Dead Pool 27th September 2015
Welcome to the bumper two week edition of The Dead Pool Newsletter, which isn’t as bumper as I would have liked as not many celebs have died in the last two weeks. However, we have plenty of news to get through and I have a good feeling about next week!
Look Who You Could Have Had:
- Max Beauvoir, 79, Haitian houngan and biochemist.
- Fred DeLuca, 67, American businessman, co-founder of Subway, leukemia.
- Jackie Collins, 77, British-American novelist, breast cancer.
- Brian Sewell, 84, British art critic.
- Jack Larson, 87, American playwright and actor (Adventures of Superman).
In Other News
The Who have been forced to postpone all 50 dates on their north American tour because frontman Roger Daltrey, 71, has viral meningitis. A statement on the Who’s website said the shows would be rescheduled for spring 2016 and added: “The band apologise to fans and realise that the postponement will cause an inconvenience for ticketholders. It wasn’t a decision taken lightly – the Who always give their fans 100% and were never going to compromise the show, but ultimately we had no alternative but to postpone.” Daltrey said: “I am now on the mend and feeling a lot better but I am going to need a considerable time to recover. The doctors tell me I will make a complete recovery, but that I should not do any touring this year.” Paedophile Pete Townshend added: “We are rescheduling all the shows for next spring 2016. Once Roger is completely well, we will come back stronger than ever and Roger and I will give you all a show to remember.”
The Dalai Lama cancelled his US appearances for October after doctors at Minnesota’s Mayo clinic advised him to rest, his office said on Friday. The 80-year-old Tibetan Buddhist leader was at the clinic in Rochester this week for what was described as a ‘routine check-up’. “The doctors have advised His Holiness to rest for the next several weeks,” his office said on its website Friday. “We deeply regret the inconvenience caused by this decision and apologise to all the people who have worked so hard in organising the visit as well as to the public.” The statement gave no more details about the Dalai Lama’s condition and representatives did not immediately respond to an email seeking additional comment.
In what some would call a Dead Pool meeting of giants, Pope Francis met Cuba’s former President, Fidel Castro, after celebrating Mass in front of tens of thousands of people in Havana. The two men discussed world affairs, religion and who would die first, in what the Vatican called an “informal and friendly” encounter. Vatican spokesman Father Federico Lombardi described the meeting between Pope Francis and Fidel Castro, which took place at the former Cuban leader’s home, as low-key with no flying monkeys seen anywhere. Shame that…
Following the last-minute cancellation of live dates last week, the Libertines have issued an official statement explaining that Pete Doherty had suffered a serious anxiety attack before their London show. The band’s scheduled gig at the Electric Ballroom in London on 10th September was called off two hours after the band were meant to be on stage, with a Manchester gig and an appearance on BBC Radio 1 also scrapped. In a statement published on Doherty’s website Albion Rooms, the band say that the decision to cancel the shows came from management “who felt it important to ensure Peter’s welfare is a priority in line with any other ongoing treatment”.
Former Tory cabinet minister Lord Parkinson has retired from the House of Lords. Cecil Parkinson, 84, was first elected as MP for Enfield West in 1970 and served as secretary of state for trade and industry under Margaret Thatcher, who’s thankfully already dead. He was forced to resign as trade secretary in 1983 after revelations that his former secretary, Sara Keays, was pregnant with his child, but went on to serve as secretary of state for energy and transport in later years. He became a member of the House of Lords in 1992 and is the latest to take advantage of new rules allowing peers to retire from the house. And we all know what happens to men who retire!
Northern Ireland’s Democratic Unionist party (DUP) leader has been discharged from hospital. Peter Robinson, 66, was admitted to Belfast’s Royal Victoria hospital on Saturday after suffering an adverse reaction to prescribed medication. A DUP spokesman confirmed Robinson would be fit enough to attend crucial talks to resolve the political crisis engulfing the powersharing political institutions at Stormont on Monday. In May, Robinson spent four nights at the hospital after suffering a suspected heart attack and had three stents fitted to help the flow of blood. At the time, he blamed his illness on a diet of fast food and lack of exercise, rather than the stress of his job.
The billionaire founder of Phones4U has revealed that his whole family have been struck down by the potentially deadly Lyme disease. Earlier this month John Caudwell told the media of his 20-year-old son Rufus’s long struggle with the disease, which started with “panic attacks, serious agoraphobia and a terror of sickness” before being correctly diagnosed in February. Now Mr Caudwell has admitted that he, his former wife, Kate McFarlane, and their two daughters, Rebekah, 35, and Rhiannon, 27, have all tested positive for Lyme disease as well. Lyme disease is a bacterial infection that can spread to humans through ticks. There are around 2,000 to 3,000 new cases in England and Wales every year. His estimated £2bn fortune has allowed him to pay for private treatment, which he acknowledges others cannot afford, but his billions still didn’t stop a tick biting him on the arse.
And finally, unsurprisingly there have been more ‘selfie’ related fatalities than shark attack deaths this year. Which begs the question, why are we not culling anyone who pouts into an iPhone? That seemed to be the answer towards the shark problem… This years count now stands at 12 deaths due to Darwinian intervention. One man was mangled in Spain after trying to snap a pic during a bull run, and two Russian men met their demise while photographing themselves with a live grenade. A woman even managed to shoot herself in the head while posing with a gun. Let’s hope the trend continues…
On This Day
- 1066 – William the Conqueror and his army set sail from the mouth of the River Somme, beginning the Norman conquest of England.
- 1822 – Jean-François Champollion announces that he has deciphered the Rosetta stone.
- 1905 – The physics journal Annalen der Physik received Albert Einstein‘s paper “Does the Inertia of a Body Depend Upon Its Energy Content?”, introducing the equation E=mc².
- 1998 – The Google internet search engine retrospectively claims this as its birthday.
- 2005 – After 162 episodes, Tom and Jerry airs its final episode titled, The Karate Guard.
- 1979 – Gracie Fields, English-Italian actress and singer (b. 1898)
- 1979 – Jimmy McCulloch, Scottish singer-songwriter and guitarist (One in a Million, Small Faces, Wings, Thunderclap Newman, and The Dukes) (b. 1953)
Last Week’s Birthdays
Sophia Loren (81), Stephen King (68), Bill Murray (65), Faith Hill (48), Ricki Lake (47), Alfonso Ribeiro (44), Liam Gallagher (43), Nick Cave (58), Joan Jett (57), Andrea Bocelli (44), Tom Felton (28), Julio Iglesias (72), Bruce Springsteen (66), Michael Douglas (71), Mark Hamill (64), Michael Madsen (57), Heather Locklear (54), Will Smith (47), Catherine Zeta-Jones (46), Bryan Ferry (70), Olivia Newton-John (67) and Serena Williams (34).
Next Week peeps!
Leave a Reply