Points!!! Dave correctly guessed that the world’s oldest man would die this year and scores himself a whopping 37 points!! But kudos to Abi who’s bagged a second Death Row inmate this year! With the demise of John Battaglia she scores 88 points plus nobody will miss the evil twat who killed both his daughters as an act of revenge against his estranged wife. The world is truly a better place without him.

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Jerry Butler, 58, American pornographic actor
• Francisco Núñez Olivera, 113, Spanish supercentenarian, world’s oldest known living man.
• Mark Salling, 35, American actor (Glee) and musician, suicide by hanging.
• Leah LaBelle, 31, Canadian-born American singer (American Idol), traffic collision.
• Rasual Butler, 38, American basketball player (Miami Heat, New Orleans Hornets, Los Angeles Clippers), traffic collision.
• John Battaglia, 62, American convicted murderer, execution by lethal injection.
• Fidel Castro Díaz-Balart, 68, Cuban nuclear physicist and scientific adviser, ‘suicide’.
• Dennis Edwards, 74, American Hall of Fame soul and R&B singer (The Contours, The Temptations), complications from meningitis.

In Other News

The recent death of an actor known for his roles in Maid Marian And Her Merry Men and Brush Strokes is being investigated by police. Howard Lew Lewis, who also appeared in Blackadder, died on 20th January in an Edinburgh hospital, aged 76. His daughter Debora Milazzo claims he had been placed on a regime of high-dose sedatives and maximum-strength opiate painkillers. Police Scotland confirmed it was investigating the complaint. The death is being treated as “unexplained”. The actor, known as Lewy, died in Ellen’s Glen House, a community hospital in Edinburgh just over a week ago. He was being treated for dementia. Ms Milazzo told the BBC Scotland News website: “I’m trying to get justice for my dad. She claims Mr Lewis had been needlessly placed on the kind of treatment plan that would be prescribed for the terminal phase of a malignant disease. Ms Milazzo insisted her father had not received a terminal diagnosis. “They suddenly just changed his medication and it was the new medication that killed him.”

Lady Gaga has cancelled the last 10 dates of the European leg of her world tour due to “severe pain”. In a statement posted on Twitter, the pop star apologised to fans and said she was “devastated”, but needed to put “myself and my well-being” first. The Grammy award-winning singer has fibromyalgia, a long-term condition which can cause pain all over the body. Shows in London and Manchester are among those affected. In the statement, it said the “tough decision” had been made on Friday night with “strong support from her medical team”. Ticket holders can apply for a refund from 6th February. “I’m so devastated I don’t know how to describe it,” Lady Gaga, 31, wrote. “All I know is that if I don’t do this, I am not standing by the words or meaning of my music.” The announcement comes after she started the UK leg of her tour at Birmingham Arena, so it’s no wonder she decided not to carry on afterwards.

US police investigating the mysterious death of film star Natalie Wood say her husband Robert Wagner is now a person of interest. Investigators in Los Angeles say Wagner has “constantly changed his story”, adding that his version of events does not “add up”. Wood was found drowned in 1981 during a California boat trip with Wagner and the actor Christopher Walken. Her death was ruled to have been an accident but questions have lingered. “As we’ve investigated the case over the last six years, I think [Wagner] is more of a person of interest now,” Lt John Corina of the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s office told CBS News. “We know now that he was the last person to be with Natalie before she disappeared,” he said. “I haven’t seen him tell the details that match all the other witnesses in this case”. Conflicting versions of what happened on the yacht have contributed to the mystery of how the actress died in November 1981. Wood, who starred in West Side Story and Rebel Without a Cause, had been partying the night before her death. The coroner’s investigation ruled she had been drinking and may have slipped trying to board a dinghy. But police say two new witnesses have corroborated accounts of a fight between Wagner and Wood on the night she disappeared. They say it appears the actress was the victim of an assault. The post-mortem report said Wood had bruises on her body and arms as well as a facial abrasion on her left cheek. TV star Wagner, 87, has not commented on the latest developments but acknowledged in his memoir that he had argued with his wife before she disappeared.

A much-celebrated gannet, the only one of its kind living on an island off the coast of New Zealand, has been found dead surrounded by concrete replicas of birds it is believed he thought were his friends and family. Nigel “no mates”, as he was affectionately known, lived his life on the edge of a desolate cliff on the almost-uninhabited Mana Island, with only 80 fake gannets for company. His body was found alongside one particular concrete gannet replica conservationists say he believed was his partner. Nigel had attempted to woo the replica in 2013 in an act of courtship, which led to him building a nest from seaweed, mud and twigs for the bird. “No mates” Nigel was lured to the island five years ago by wildlife officials, who first placed the concrete replicas on the cliff side in December 1997, broadcasting their calls through a sound system in hopes of establishing a new colony. He was the first gannet to settle on Mana Island in 40 years and conservationists hoped there would be many more, but none followed and he developed a moniker among his fans of “the world’s loneliest bird”.  In a cruel twist of fate, three new gannets were spotted on the island last year on Christmas Eve, marking 20 years since the concrete colony was first established, and it was thought that Nigel would finally have some flesh-and-blood company. Nigel’s body has now been sent to the Massey University to determine a cause of death.  It is unknown where he will be laid to rest but one fan suggested on the Friends of Mana Island group that he be cremated and his ashes stored in a concrete urn made to look like him. Great work conservationists!

On This Day

• 1703 – In Edo (now Tokyo), 46 of the Forty-seven Ronin commit seppuku (ritual suicide) as recompense for avenging their master’s death.
• 1789 – George Washington is unanimously elected as the first President of the United States by the U.S. Electoral College.
• 1974 – The Symbionese Liberation Army kidnaps Patty Hearst in Berkeley, California.
• 1976 – In Guatemala and Honduras an earthquake kills more than 22,000.
• 1977 – A Chicago Transit Authority elevated train rear-ends another and derails, killing 11 and injuring 180, the worst accident in the agency’s history.
• 1998 – The 5.9 M_w Afghanistan earthquake shakes the Takhar Province with a maximum Mercalli intensity of VII (Very strong). With 2,323 killed, and 818 injured, damage is considered extreme.
• 2004 – Facebook, a mainstream online social networking site, is founded by Mark Zuckerberg.

Deaths

• 1983 – Karen Carpenter, American singer (b. 1950)
• 1987 – Liberace, American singer-songwriter and pianist, (b. 1919)

Last Week’s Birthdays

Isla Fisher (42), Warwick Davis (48), Morgan Fairchild (68), Gemma Arterton (32), Brent Spiner (69), David Jason (78), Shakira (41), Jonathan Banks (71), Justin Timberlake (37), Minnie Driver (48), Dexter Fletcher (52), Christian Bale (44), Olivia Colman (44), Gene Hackman (88), Vanessa Redgrave (81), Phil Collins (67), Heather Graham (48), Katharine Ross (78), Tom Selleck (73), Oprah Winfrey (64), Marc Singer (70), Tim Healy (66), Elijah Wood (37), Ariel Winter (20), Alan Alda (82) and Frank Darabont (59).

Crematorium Fun! 

Ever wondered what makes a crematorium fun to work at? Well, wonder no more. Staff have revealed what keeps them on their toes, like the time when a coconut that was placed inside a coffin “sent fear” through staff at a crematorium when it exploded. Boom!

Apparently it’s quite a problem. Bolton Council has urged mourners to abide by crematorium rules and not “slip” items into coffins. Donna Ball, Assistant Director of Community Services, said a “hell of an explosion can sometimes occur”. Other items of concern include mobile phones, TV remotes, e-cigarettes and bottles of alcohol.

Ms Ball told us at Dead Pool Towers: “We are asking people to be considerate regarding the items they place into coffins before the cremation process. “We have seen a rise in things like e-cigarettes, bottles of whisky and vodka, golf balls, sometimes golf clubs, and mobile phones. Mobile phones in particular are a real issue for us”. Ms Ball said: “Usually the funeral director will pick them up but sometimes things  are slid inside peoples’ pockets and they are just not picked up during the process, then when they go through the cremation process a hell of an explosion can sometimes occur”. She added that electrical items with batteries also push crematorium emissions up to “unacceptable levels”.

Louise Walch-Grognet, of Fred Hamer Funeral Services, said they check the coffins to make sure contraband items are not slipped in. “They’ve asked can they put love letters in, cigarettes, ashes of their pets,” she said. “I’ve had a biker whose family wanted him to wear his leathers. Obviously we couldn’t do that”. The funeral director said on one occasion she was even asked if an extra set of underwear could be placed with the deceased. Ms Walch-Grognet said it was her procedure to “look under the lining of the coffin” after the service due to mourners trying to sneak items in.

I bet it’s a laugh a minute there!

Unsurprisingly, nobody scored this week, however we all know a few people on the list below. Without further ado, let’s get on with it!

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Howard Lew Lewis, 76, English comedian and actor (Brush Strokes, Maid Marian and Her Merry Men, Chelmsford 123).
• Jim Rodford, 76, English bassist (Argent, The Kinks, The Zombies), injuries from a fall.
• Connie Sawyer, 105, American actress (Dumb and Dumber, Pineapple Express, When Harry Met Sally…).
• Simon Shelton, 52, British actor (Teletubbies, Incredible Games).
• Ursula K. Le Guin, 88, American science fiction writer (A Wizard of Earthsea, The Left Hand of Darkness, The Dispossessed).
• Lari White, 52, American country singer (“Now I Know”, “That’s My Baby”) and actress (Cast Away), peritoneal cancer.
• Mark E. Smith, 60, English singer and songwriter (The Fall).
• Stacey Young, 52, British fashion model, brain cancer.
• Mort Walker, 94, American comics artist (Beetle Bailey, Hi and Lois), complications from pneumonia.
• Ingvar Kamprad, 91, Swedish businessman, founder of IKEA.

In Other News

Neil Diamond has officially announced his retirement from touring due to his recent Parkinson’s diagnosis. The third leg of his 50th Anniversary tour, which was set to launch in March across Australia and New Zealand, has been cancelled as was medically recommended by his doctor. Fans who already purchased tickets will be refunded in full. “I plan to remain active in writing, recording and other projects for a long time to come,” the singer wrote in a statement Monday on his website. “My thanks goes out to my loyal and devoted audiences around the world. You will always have my appreciation for your support and encouragement. This ride has been ‘so good, so good, so good’ thanks to you.” Diamond will be presented with the Lifetime Achievement Award by the Recording Academy at the Grammy Awards on Sunday, thus assuring his death as soon as possible.

Sir Ken Dodd has pulled no punches in attacking the sick individuals behind a fake news report that claimed he had died. In an exclusive interview with the The Dead Pool editorial team, and speaking from his hospital bed, the national treasure told us he is on the road to recovery. This story of his demise was spread across the nation via social media. The veteran entertainer said: “These monstrous evil trolls – people – should go back to the hell they came from. I wish them a reverse curse.” Dodd, who celebrated his 90th birthday in November, was admitted to the Liverpool Heart and Chest Hospital a week last Friday with a severe chest infection. And having dismissed the sad people who caused such upset on Monday night, he said: “I’ve had a good day today (Tuesday) and I’m really starting to get some kind of recovery, but it is going to take some time. “According to the medical people here, millions of people all over Britain are suffering from the same complaint – and it takes a long time to get rid of it.”

Julian Assange’s long stay in the Ecuadorian embassy in London is having a “dangerous” impact on his physical and mental health, according to clinicians who carried out the most recent assessments of him. They renewed calls for the WikiLeaks publisher to be granted safe passage to a London hospital. Sondra Crosby, a doctor and associate professor at the Boston University’s school of medicine and public health, and Brock Chisholm, a London-based consultant clinical psychologist, examined Assange for 20 hours over three days in October. Although the two did not go into details, Assange’s health appears to be deteriorating significantly after more than five years holed up in the embassy. Since he sought refuge in the embassy in June 2012, following an extradition request from Sweden over allegations of sexual assault, there have been various reports that he has a serious shoulder issue that requires an MRI scan, which would be near impossible to organise inside the embassy. He is also said to have a lung problem. They added, “Our assessment reveals that he has had no access to sunlight, appropriate ventilation or outside space for over five and a half years. This has taken a considerable physical as well as psychological toll.”

Sir Elton John has announced he will stop touring in order to prioritise his family. Speaking in New York, the star said he would say goodbye to fans with a series of 300 dates spanning three years. “I always thought I was going to be like Ray Charles, BB King – on the road forever,” he said. “My priorities have changed. We had children and it changed our lives. That doesn’t mean to say I’m not going to be creative. But I’m not going to travel.” The star denied reports in the press that he was retiring due to ill health. “Last year I picked up an infection and I was very ill and it knocked me sideways,” he admitted. But I still did 96 shows. “Believe me – if you ever do 300 shows, you’re not in ill health.” Isn’t that what Michael Jackson said???

Fiften To One quiz show host William G. Stewart left more than £2.4 million in his will – but nothing to his eldest son, The Dead Pool can reveal. Stewart died aged 84 in September last year after a short illness. He left most of his fortune and his Surrey mansion to third wife Laura, 60, and four of his five children will inherit the estate once Laura passes away. But his first child, Nick, a media consultant, will not receive a penny, according to official records. Stewart produced and directed a string of programmes including Bless This House, Love Thy Neighbour and The Price Is Right before going on to pose the questions on Fifteen To One from 1988 to 2003. He initially wanted Jonathan Ross to host it but stepped into the limelight himself when Ross turned down the role. Last night, Nick’s wife Christine said he was not aware he had been left out of his father’s will. Stewart’s family declined to comment yesterday.

On This Day

• 814 – Charlemagne dies of pleurisy in Aachen as the first Holy Roman Emperor. He is succeeded by his son Louis the Pious as king of the Frankish Empire.
• 1393 – King Charles VI of France is nearly killed when several dancers’ costumes catch fire during a masquerade ball.
• 1547 – Henry VIII dies. His nine-year-old son, Edward VI, becomes king.
• 1896 – Walter Arnold of East Peckham, Kent, becomes the first person to be convicted of speeding. He was fined one shilling, plus costs, for speeding at 8 mph (13 km/h), thereby exceeding the contemporary speed limit of 2 mph (3.2 km/h).
• 1956 – Elvis Presley makes his first American television appearance.
• 1958 – The Lego company patents the design of its Lego bricks, still compatible with bricks produced today.
• 1985 – Supergroup USA for Africa (United Support of Artists for Africa) records the hit single We Are the World, to help raise funds for Ethiopian famine relief.
• 1986 – Space Shuttle program: STS-51-L mission: Space Shuttle Challenger explodes after liftoff, killing all seven astronauts on board.

Deaths

• 814 – Charlemagne, Holy Roman emperor (b. 742)
• 1547 – Henry VIII, king of England (b. 1491)
• 1939 – W. B. Yeats, Irish poet and playwright, Nobel Prize laureate (b. 1865)
• 1986 – crew of Space Shuttle Challenger
• 1996 – Jerry Siegel, American author and illustrator, co-created Superman (b. 1914)

Last Week’s Birthdays

Bridget Fonda (54), Patton Oswalt (49), Alan Cumming  (53), James Cromwell (78), Mimi Rogers (62), Frank Miller (61), Scott Glenn (77), Ellen DeGeneres (60), Eddie Van Halen (63), Alicia Keys (37), John Terry (68), Kristen Schaal (40), Mischa Barton (32), Nastassja Kinski (57),  Ade Edmondson (61), Neil Diamond (77), Rutger Hauer (74), Gil Gerard (75), Olivia d’Abo (49), Linda Blair (59), Piper Laurie (86), Geena Davis (62), Martin Shaw (73), and Emma Bunton (42).

We have some winners people! Laura and Abi both correctly guessed that the powers that be would go ahead and execute Anthony Allen Shore by poking him with a deadly cocktail of chemicals. Can’t say we’ll be missing that guy. Well done to Laura and Abi, 95 points each!

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Cyrille Regis, 59, English footballer (West Bromwich Albion, Coventry City, Aston Villa), cardiac arrest.
• Dolores O’Riordan, 46, Irish singer and musician (The Cranberries, D.A.R.K.).
• Peter Wyngarde, 90, British actor (Department S, Jason King, Flash Gordon).
• Charles Burnett III, 61, British-born American investor and land-speed record holder (Inspiration), helicopter crash.
• Jessica Falkholt, 29, Australian actress (Home and Away), injuries from a traffic collision.
• John Barton, 89, British theatre director, co-founder of the Royal Shakespeare Company.
• Peter Mayle, 78, British author (A Year in Provence).
• Anthony Allen Shore, 55, American serial killer and rapist, execution by lethal injection.
• Jim Rodford, 76, English musician (The Kinks, The Swinging Blue Jeans, Argent)

In Other News

Sir Ken Dodd, 90, is in hospital battling for his life!! The goofy comedian is reportedly under the weather with a severe chest infection after catching the flu. Dodd’s hospital dash was apparently made by an ambulance in his hometown of Liverpool nearly a week ago. It’s been claimed he was struggling to breathe when paramedics were called on Friday. Ken caught the flu whilst performing a gig at the Liverpool Echo Arena in December. However, a spokesman for Sir Ken said that the comedy legend is expected to make a full recovery. “He went in for a check on Friday because with everything that has been going around and Ken’s age, it’s better to be safe than sorry. They are just keeping a close watch on him and making sure all is well. His wife is reportedly at his bedside with him.  Sir Ken rose to fame with his Diddy Men characters who appeared with him on stage and TV. He also had a radio and recording career, with his signature tune Happiness released in 1964. Dodd also made it into the Guinness Book of Records for telling 1,500 jokes in three and a half hours, none of which made anyone laugh.

BBC newsreader George Alagiah is to undergo medical treatment for bowel cancer for the second time. The news was confirmed by the 62-year-old’s agent, who added: “He is in discussions with his medical team about treatment options and the way forward.” Alagiah was previously treated in April 2014, returning to the screen 18 months later. In a statement, the BBC said: “Everyone sends George and his family their best wishes as he undergoes treatment.” Alagiah said: “My brilliant doctors are determined to get me back to a disease-free state and I know they have the skill to do just that. “I learned last time around how important the support of family and friends is and I am blessed in that department. I genuinely feel positive as I prepare for this new challenge.” Alagiah found out he had stage four bowel cancer in 2014 after complaining of blood in his stools. He had to undergo three operations to remove eight tumours in his liver as well as having chemotherapy.

Brazil legend Pele is resting at home according to his spokesperson, who dismissed reports he had been taken to hospital with exhaustion. The 77-year-old was due to travel to London this weekend for a dinner held in his honour by the Football Writers Association. Pele – the only player to win three World Cups – withdrew and the FWA said he was being monitored by doctors. But his spokesperson called reports of his hospitalisation “fake news”. “He just didn’t want to make a long and stressful trip to London, in and out of who knows how many planes and airports,” said Jose Fornos Rodrigues. “That’s all.” Pele has been taken to hospital for kidney and prostate problems in recent years.

Motor racing legend Sir Stirling Moss has decided to retire  from public life following a long illness. A statement from his son said Moss had made the decision because of his “slow recovery” from health problems. The 88-year-old spent 134 days in hospital after suffering a chest infection while on holiday in Singapore in December 2016. Moss and his wife will now “spend more time with each other and the rest of the family”, said the statement. Moss is widely regarded as one of the greatest Formula 1 drivers of all time, even though he did not win the World Championship. Moss was effectively forced to retire from top-level motorsport in 1962 after a crash at Goodwood left him in a coma for a month and partially paralysed for six months.

Radio host and TV presenter Chris Tarrant was found to be over the drink-drive limit after he was reported to police by a fellow pub-goer. The star had been served four brandy and ports at the Bladebone Inn in Bucklebury, Berkshire, before driving home, Reading Magistrates Court heard. Tarrant, who admitted drink-driving, was banned from driving for a year. After the hearing, he told reporters: “I made a mistake and I paid for it. I shouldn’t have driven.” The Who Wants to be a Millionaire host was found to have 50 microgrammes of alcohol per 100 millilitres of breath. The legal limit is 35 microgrammes.  The 71-year-old said he “honestly didn’t think” he had been over the legal limit when he got in his Mercedes to drive the short journey home, on 16th December. Prosecutor Hasrat Ali told the hearing that staff and drinkers at the pub were “concerned that he had decided to drive home”. “One member of the public had noticed that Mr Tarrant had stumbled near the bar area,” she said. As a result of a discussion in the pub, a member of the public phoned the police. Thirteen minutes after the call was made, officers arrived at Tarrant’s home in Osgoods Gully, Bucklebury. Tarrant’s counsel Simon Ray said the drinks that were bought in the pub were not all consumed by his client. He added that the TV presenter had a knee condition that explained the stumble. District Judge Shomon Khan said despite the “relatively low reading” nothing he could say would “reduce the seriousness of the offence”. He also fined Tarrant £6,000. He should have phoned a friend….

On This Day

• 1793 – After being found guilty of treason by the French National Convention, Louis XVI of France is executed by guillotine.
• 1961 – Four hundred thirty-five workers are buried alive when a mine in Coalbrook, Free State, South Africa collapses.
• 1968 – A B-52 bomber crashes near Thule Air Base, contaminating the area after its nuclear payload ruptures. One of the four bombs remains unaccounted for after the cleanup operation is complete.

Deaths

• 1793 – Louis XVI of France (b. 1754)
• 1924 – Vladimir Lenin, Russian lawyer and politician (b. 1870)
• 1938 – Georges Méliès, French actor, director, and producer (b. 1861)
• 1950 – George Orwell, British novelist, essayist, and critic (b. 1903)
• 1959 – Cecil B. DeMille, American director, producer, and screenwriter (b. 1881)
• 1998 – Jack Lord, American actor, director, and producer (b. 1920)
• 2013 – Michael Winner, English director, producer, and screenwriter (b. 1935)
• 2015 – Leon Brittan, English lawyer and politician (b. 1939)

Last Week’s Birthdays

Rainn Wilson (52), David Lynch (72), Tom Baker (84), Bill Maher (62), Buzz Aldrin (88), Katey Sagal (64), Dolly Parton (72), Tippi Hedren (88), Rob Delaney (41), Michael Crawford (76), Dave Bautista (49), Kevin Costner (63), Mark Rylance (58), Jason Segel (38),  Jane Horrocks (54), John Boorman (85), Samantha Mumba (35), Sharon Mitchell (61), Jim Carrey (56), Zooey Deschanel (38), Betty White (96), James Earl Jones (87), Sophie Dee (34), Naveen Andrews (49), Denis O’Hare (56), Kid Rock (47), Michelle Obama (54), Caroline Munro (69), John Carpenter (70), Kate Moss (44), James May (55), Eva Habermann (42), Sade (59), James Nesbitt (53), Mario Van Peebles (61), DJ Jazzy Jeff (52), Claudia Winkleman (46), Jason Bateman (49), Faye Dunaway (77), Carl Weathers (70), Mark Addy (54), LL Cool J (50) and Dave Grohl (49).

We have a winner! The first death of the season falls to Nickie who correctly guessed that the great Bella Emberg would meet her maker. Not only does she get the extra 50 points for the first death of the season, Nickie also listed her as her Woman, so a whopping 220 points awarded in total!! She’s now become the one to beat! Well done Nickie!!

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Thomas Bopp, 68, American astronomer, co-discoverer of Comet Hale–Bopp, liver failure.
• Eddie Clarke, 67, British guitarist (Motörhead, Fastway), pneumonia.
• Edgar Ray Killen, 92, American Ku Klux Klan leader and convicted murderer.
• Bella Emberg, 80, British actress (The Russ Abbot Show, The Benny Hill Show, Bear Behaving Badly).
• Doreen Tracey, 74, English-born American actress (The Mickey Mouse Club), pneumonia.
• Keith Jackson, 89, American sportscaster (ABC Sports, Wide World of Sports)
• Ray Thomas, 76, English singer-songwriter (“Veteran Cosmic Rocker”, “For My Lady”) and Hall of Fame musician (The Moody Blues), prostate cancer.

In Other News

As you may have heard, Big Brother star Rebekah Shelton is not dead after a social media ‘hack’. A tweet from her verified account said she had died unexpectedly, however a video apparently posted by the transgender Big Brother star says she is not dead and was the victim of a Twitter hoax. The 32-year-old was on Big Brother in 2009 where – as Rodrigo Lopes – she finished fifth. A later tweet from the account said although the hoax was a “horrible experience”, the positive thing was that “I realise that I’m loved and so many people cared about me”.  Sadly, we at Dead Pool Towers don’t give a shit about her.

Olympic BMX silver medallist Jelle van Gorkom is in a coma after a training accident on Tuesday. The Royal Dutch Cycling Union said the 27-year-old had “broken ribs, a fracture in the face, a tear in the skull and damage to the liver, spleen and kidneys”. The incident occurred at the National Sports Centre Papendal in Arnhem. Van Gorkom won silver medals at the 2015 World Championships and the 2016 Rio Games. Bas de Bever, the Dutch national BMX coach, asked that the rider, his girlfriend and his family be given “peace and privacy”, while Jochem Schellens, director at the National Sports Centre Papendal, added: “It is a terrible accident and… we wish them all the strength in the coming period.” Who said cycling was fun and safe?

Andy Murray has survived hip surgery in Melbourne and says he hopes to be playing again in time for this summer’s grass-court season. The former world number one, 30, has not played a competitive match since he was knocked out of Wimbledon in July. The ongoing problem forced the Scot to pull out of the Australian Open, which begins on 15th January. “I’m not finished playing tennis yet. I’m going to be competing at the highest level again,” he said. “I’m very optimistic about the future – the surgeon is very happy about how it went.” Murray, a three-time Grand Slam champion, believes if he can return to 95% of his best, that will be enough for him to compete again at the top level. However, we know that 95% of ‘his best’ isn’t anywhere good enough. Murray, who has fallen to 19th in the world, said he is not “interested in coming back for a specific tournament”. Which is fair enough, we don’t want to watch him either.

On This Day

• 1907 – An earthquake in Kingston, Jamaica kills more than 1,000 people.
• 1969 – An accidental explosion aboard the USS Enterprise near Hawaii kills 27 people.

Deaths

• 1742 – Edmond Halley, English astronomer, geophysicist, mathematician, meteorologist, and physicist (b. 1656)
• 1898 – Lewis Carroll, English novelist, poet, and mathematician (b. 1832)
• 1957 – Humphrey Bogart, American actor (b. 1899)
• 1977 – Anthony Eden, English soldier and politician, Prime Minister of the United Kingdom (b. 1897)
• 2006 – Shelley Winters, American actress (b. 1920)
• 2009 – Ricardo Montalbán, Mexican actor (b. 1920)
• 2016 – Alan Rickman, English actor (b. 1946)

Last Week’s Birthdays

Orlando Bloom (41), Liam Hemsworth (28), Michael Peña (42), William B. Davis (80), Bill Bailey (53), Kirstie Alley (67), Rachael Harris (50), Rob Zombie (53), Zayn Malik (25), Howard Stern (64), Pixie Lott (27), Melanie C (44), Jeff Bezos (54), Jason Connery (55), Mary J. Blige (47), Rachel Riley (32), John Sessions (65), Jemaine Clement (44), Evan Handler (57), George Foreman (69), Fran Walsh (59), Rod Stewart (73), Pat Benatar (65), Joely Richardson (53), Imelda Staunton (62), Catherine Duchess of Cambridge (36), Jimmy Page (74), Michelle Forbes (53), Stephen Hawking (76), Amber Benson (41), Nicolas Cage (54), Jeremy Renner (47), Linda Kozlowski (60), Erin Gray (68), Lewis Hamilton (33),  Helen Worth (67) and Kenny Loggins (70).

Welcome to the first official newsletter of the season. Attached to this weeks email is a list of each competitors email address, can you all please double check yours and update your outgoing list so we don’t annoy anyone who has dropped out. If you’re reading this on the website and didn’t get an email, please let me know.

Not much to report, nobody of relevance has died yet, but good news for those of you who have listed Dick Van Dyke, his younger brother has just died, so there is hope the almost-immortal Dick might soon follow his sibling. Oh, and don’t shit yourself when you see the dead Pfeiffer in the following list like I did…

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Jon Paul Steuer, 33, American actor (Grace Under Fire, Little Giants, Star Trek: The Next Generation) and musician, fire.
• Michael Pfeiffer, 92, German football player (national team) and manager (Roda JC Kerkrade, Alemannia Aachen).
• Frank Buxton, 87, American actor (What’s Up, Tiger Lily?), screenwriter and director (The Odd Couple, Happy Days).
• John Young, 87, American astronaut whose was on (Apollo 16, STS-1).
• Jerry Van Dyke, 86, American actor and comedian on My Mother the Car, The Dick Van Dyke Show and Coach. He died due to declining health from injuries in an car accident.

In Other News

Singer Sam Bailey has said she is “determined” to get back on the pantomime stage after being knocked out by a loft ladder at her home. The 40-year-old had been trying to retrieve a suitcase when she was hurt in the bizarre accident on Tuesday. The X Factor star is playing the role of the Enchantress in Beauty and the Beast at De Montfort Hall in Leicester. While recovering at her Leicester home, she thanked emergency staff and tweeted to say she was “on the mend”. Bailey, who won X Factor in 2013, posted to say she was “gutted” not to be performing after the accident. Martin Ballard, a BBC Radio Leicester presenter and the dame in the pantomime, said the cast was “shocked” to hear the news. “Sam’s singing is irreplaceable and she drives the whole story,” he said.

After taking some time out from the spotlight, Robbie Williams has now revealed he spent seven days in intensive care after doctors discovered ‘abnormalities’ on his brain. The former Take That star was forced to cancel his Russian tour dates back in September due to a ‘mystery illness’ which left him in ICU, but so far hasn’t given specific details why. Now, Robbie has opened up about his health scare, revealing he was rushed to hospital after he became seriously ill while backstage at a gig in Zurich. ‘My left arm went numb and I couldn’t stop dribbling out of the side of my mouth’, he told our roving Dead Pool reporter. ‘I had a headache and I was also having trouble breathing. I couldn’t get a full breath.’ When a doctor examined the 43-year-old star, Robbie was told he could still perform the show as he doesn’t normally use his brain, but later flew to London for emergency tests where doctors found what looked like blood on his brain. ‘That was obviously very scary, but everyone kept telling me not to worry as I had nothing to lose’ he continued. ‘I was confused and scared, but I knew I was in the right place. And, maybe naively, I felt like I knew I was going to be OK,’ he added. Sadly, Robbie revealed that after seven days in intensive care, he was declared fit to leave and then spent two months recovering back at his home in LA.

‘Jeopardy!’ host Alex Trebek is on a leave of absence from the show after undergoing brain surgery for blood clots — medically known as subdural hematoma — that were “caused by a fall I endured two months ago.” Wearing a yellow sweater, jeans and a blue “Jeopardy!” hat, the 77-year-old wryly addressed our reporter, calling the procedure “a slight medical problem.” “Surgery was performed. After two days in the hospital, I came home to start recovery,” he said. “The prognosis is excellent, and I expect to be back in the studio taping more ‘Jeopardy!’ programs very, very soon.” Nothing quite like that American optimism.

On This Day

• 1782 – The first American commercial bank, the Bank of North America, opens.
• 1927 – The first transatlantic telephone service is established from New York City to London.
• 1928 – A disastrous flood of the River Thames kills 14 people and causes extensive damage to much of riverside London.
• 1948 – Kentucky Air National Guard pilot Thomas Mantell crashes while in pursuit of a supposed UFO.
• 2015 – Two gunmen commit mass murder at the offices of Charlie Hebdo in Paris, shooting twelve people execution style, and wounding eleven others.

Deaths

• 1536 – Catherine of Aragon (b. 1485)
• 1943 – Nikola Tesla, Serbian-American physicist and engineer (b. 1856)
• 1989 – Hirohito, Japanese emperor (b. 1901)
• 2007 – Magnus Magnusson, Icelandic journalist, author, and academic (b. 1929)

Last Week’s Birthdays

Eddie Redmayne (36), Rowan Atkinson (63), Norman Reedus (49), Nigella Lawson (58), January Jones (40), Bradley Cooper (43), Diane Keaton (72), Clancy Brown (59), Robert Duvall (87), Hayao Miyazaki (77), Marilyn Manson (49), Vinnie Jones (53), Julia Ormond (53), Matt Frewer (60), Julian Sands (60), Michael Stipe (58), Mel Gibson (62), Victoria Principal (68), Tia Carrere (51), Cuba Gooding Jr. (50), Verne Troyer (49) and Frank Langella (80).