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Dead Pool 11th September 2016

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Bit thin on the ground again this week. So I wont warble on too much. But if any of you amazing readers would like a go at guest editing or supplying a few articles, please do have a go!

Look Who You Could Have Had:

In Other News

anneThe Princess Royal has cancelled her public engagements next week as she  recovers from a bad chest infection, Buckingham Palace has said. A spokesman said: “On doctors’ orders she has cancelled her engagements for the coming week. She is resting privately at home.” Anne was treated at Aberdeen Royal infirmary on Wednesday before being discharged and returning to Balmoral. Last weekend, she joined the Queen, the Duke of Edinburgh and the Prince of Wales at the Braemar Highland Games, which are held a short distance from the royal family’s summer retreat in Aberdeenshire. The 66-year-old also spent time in Brazil at the Olympic Games as a member of the International Olympic Committee. Could it be some kind of Zika virus variant??

dinoireA death we all missed back in April was that of the first-ever person to have a face transplant, Frenchwoman Isabelle Dinoire. In 2005, surgeons  gave her a new nose and mouth after she was disfigured by her pet dog. But heavy use of immunosuppressant drugs weakened her and she succumbed to cancer in April at the age of 49. News of her death, announced by a hospital in Amiens, was delayed to respect her family’s privacy. She told the BBC in 2009 that when she looked in the mirror she saw a mixture of herself and the donor. “The donor is always with me,” she said. Figaro newspaper said she had suffered another transplant rejection. The strong anti-rejection treatment she was receiving led to two cancers, it added. In her BBC interview she said her disfigurement by her dog had come as a result of an attempt to end her life. After taking an overdose of sleeping pills, she awoke lying beside a pool of blood, with her pet Labrador at her side. The dog had apparently found her unconscious, and desperate to rouse her, had gnawed away at her face. The injuries to her mouth, nose and chin were so extreme that doctors ruled out a routine face reconstruction. Instead they proposed a ground-breaking face transplant. She was happy with the surgery but expressed distress at the attention from the media and passers-by that the operation brought her.

john-hinckley-jrLook out all potential presidential candidates because the man who shot US President Ronald Reagan in 1981 has been released from a psychiatric hospital in Washington, DC, 35 years after his assassination attempt stunned the world. John Hinckley Jr, who is now 61, was released from St Elizabeth’s hospital on Saturday morning and returned to his mother’s home in Virginia. Mr Reagan and three others were injured in the shooting outside a Washington hotel on 30 March 1981, weeks into his first White House term. Mr Hinckley, who was obsessed with the movie Taxi Driver and its young star Jodie Foster, is thought to have been trying to impress the actress. He was later found not guilty by reason of insanity. In July, after several decades of treatment at St Elizabeth’s, a judge ruled that Mr Hinckley posed no further danger to himself or to the public. In recent years, he had been spending 17 days a month at his 90-year-old mother’s home, on a golf course in the gated community of Kingsmill, where his bedroom is reportedly decorated with his paintings of houses and cats. Under the conditions of his release, Mr Hinckley will be forbidden to speak to the media and from having any social media accounts. He is banned from contacting Ms Foster or any of his other victims and their families. He must see a psychiatrist regularly and will be permitted to drive no further than 30 miles from the home unaccompanied – or 50 miles if accompanied.

On This Day

Deaths

Last Week’s Birthdays

Beyonce (35), Bob Newhart (88), Raquel Welch (76), Michael Keaton (65), Rose McGowan (43), Roger Waters (73), Delores O’Riordan (45), Pippa Middleton (33), Idris Elba (44), Gloria Gaynor (67), Chrissie Hynde (65), Julie Kavner (66), Shannon Elizabeth (43), Evan Rachel Wood (29), Heather Thomas (59), Martin Freeman (45), Hugh Grant (56), Adam Sandler (50), Eric Stonestreet (45), Michael Buble (41), Joe Perry (66), Colin Firth (56), Guy Richie (48) and Karl Lagerfeld (83).

The Last Word

“I cannot.” – Louis Pasteur – His response when he was offered a cup of milk.

Next week peeps!

Dead Pool 4th September 2016

Dead Pool BackgroundUnsurprisingly, nobody listed Gene Wilder. Often is the case that well loved celebrities never make the list. Remember, if you want to win it, you have to be unscrupulous and harsh.

Look Who You Could Have Had:

In Other News

islam-karimovWe were going to lead this week with the Uzbek President/Dictator, Islam Karimov, having a stroke. Alas he died. So that put a big spanner in the works for us at Death Towers, but we’ll lead with the story anyway.

It does leave central Asia’s most populous country in a state of turmoil and political uncertainty. The Uzbek government did not confirm the reports at first but played funeral music on state channels. Later on Friday the government eventually released a statement saying the 78-year-old president had died. Karimov has no official successor. The most likely candidate to replace him appears to be Uzbekistan’s long-time prime minister, Shavkat Mirziyoyev. There is little prospect that the country of 31 million will democratise, after a quarter of a century characterised by repression, the boiling of prisoners and unflinching authoritarian rule. Even by the standards of the region, Karimov treated manifestations of dissent harshly. The upheaval has sparked much uncertainty for the Karimov family, his daughter, Gulnara Karimova, was for a long time considered a potential successor to her father and was a highly public figure has disappeared. Perhaps we should be looking at listing a few Uzbek elites in the near future.

jeremy-vineJeremy Vine almost got run over by an irate woman in a car as he was cycling home. The lady involved in the alleged road-rage incident has said his “dangerous” cycling provoked her foul-mouthed response. Vine shared the footage of the alleged road rage incident with his Facebook and Twitter followers on Tuesday. The 51-year-old filmed the “horrible moment” on a helmet-mounted camera while cycling home in Kensington, London after hosting his show on Friday 26th August. Have a look at the video yourself and make up your own mind. One thing is for sure, don’t have a wobbly at a cyclist when they work for the BBC.

And finally, an emergency response was initiated at a school in Ohio after around 40 children ingested Bhut Jolokia peppers – one of the hottest species in existence. An unidentified student brought the peppers into Milton Union Middle School, West Milton, and apparently shared them among other students aged 11 to 14. Police and emergency responders were contacted on Friday after the students began to exhibit symptoms such as blotchy skin, hives, sweating, watering eyes and general discomfort. Five students had to be hospitalised. The students “took these peppers voluntarily”, according to a police investigation. “We all drank like 10 cartons of milk,” eighth grade student Cody Schmidt told the newspaper, adding that the pepper was “really hot”. The school’s superintendent, Brad Ritchey, said: “The response of emergency services was amazing, deputies and help from surrounding paramedics. Research conducted in 1980 found a 68 kilogram human would need to eat at least 1.3 kilograms of the hottest chillies in one sitting for the peppers to have a lethal effect.

On This Day

Deaths

Last Week’s Birthdays

Paul Rubens (64), Daniel Stern (59), Shania Twain (51), Jack Black (47), Jason Priestley (47), LeAnne Rimes (34), Florence Welch (30), Elliott Gould (78), Rebecca DeMornay (57), John McCain (80), Michael Chiklis (53), Cameron Diaz (44), Warren Buffett (86), Van Morrison (71), Richard Gere (67), Chris Tucker (45), Lily Tomlin (77), Barry Gibb (70), Gloria Estefan (59), Keanu Reeves (51), Salma Hayek (50), Jimmy Connors (64), Lennox Lewis (51) and Charlie Sheen (51).

The Last Word

Now I can cross the Shifting Sands. – L. Frank Baum, author of The Wizard of Oz.

  • Note: Baum was referring to the Shifting Sands, the impassable desert surrounding the Land of Oz.

Next week peeps!

Dead Pool 28th August 2016

Dead Pool Background

No points to award this week, but we do have the joy of reading about Richard Branson falling on his face. If that’s not enough for you, then please take a moment to find a piece of your soul that cares, as the Storm Trooper who hit his head on a door frame has passed away. We’re not sure if he’s actually dead, he might come back as a ghost in subsequent sequels.

Look Who You Could Have Had:

In Other News

Virgin-1Sir Richard Branson says he thought he was “going to die” after crashing his bike on Caribbean island Virgin Gorda. The businessman said he was “extremely fortunate” only to have suffered a cracked cheek and torn ligaments. Sir Richard said he was cycling down a hill when he hit a speed bump, and “the next thing I knew, I was being hurled over the handlebars and my life was literally flashing before my eyes.” His bicycle “went flying off the cliff and disappeared”, he said. In a post on the Virgin website, the 66-year-old said: “I was heading down a hill towards Leverick Bay when it suddenly got really dark and I managed to hit a sleeping policeman hump in the road head on. “I really thought I was going to die. I went flying head-first towards the concrete road, but fortunately my shoulder and cheek took the brunt of the impact, and I was wearing a helmet that saved my life. “We’ve since recovered the crumpled bicycle, completely destroyed. My cheek has been badly damaged and my knee, chin, shoulder and body severely cut.” Sir Richard said his assistant, Helen Clarke, was first on the scene as he was “lying prostrate on the road” and then another member of his team, George, “sprinted from the bottom of the hill” to assist. The accident happened on the fifth anniversary of a fire which destroyed his luxury home on Necker Island.

CollinsPhil Collins has addressed his former alcohol addiction and said he came close to nearly dying due to heavy drinking. The 65-year-old grammy-award winning singer explained he started drinking more after his third marriage broke up and his family moved away to Miami. Collins said he was in turn left with an emotional vacuum and began drinking excessively. “There’s a chapter in it about the drinking, which escalated when my third marriage broke up, and I retired,” he told The New York Times while talking about his new memoir I’m Not Dead Yet. “I was left with this huge void. I didn’t want to work because I wanted to be with the kids, but the kids weren’t there anymore, because they moved to Miami, and I was still in Switzerland.” “You start drinking, and then you start drinking too much. Then it physically hurts you. I came very close to dying at that point. I’m being honest about that. The book is honest, it’s self-deprecating. I’m not shirking my responsibilities. I apologise when I need to.” Collins has spoken about his struggle with alcohol in the past, explaining that heavy drinking nearly cost him his life and he would open a bottle of wine at 11am in the morning at the height of his drinking. Once a drinker, always a drinker.

Lee Hsien LoongSingapore prime minister Lee Hsien Loong caused a scare when he fainted briefly while delivering a lengthy televised speech on Sunday, but he resumed speaking after resting. The 64-year-old cancer survivor, son of the city-state’s late founding leader Lee Kuan Yew, suddenly stopped speaking more than two hours into his speech and had to be helped off the stage. When he returned about an hour and 20 minutes later, the crowd in the packed auditorium gave him a standing ovation and thousands of well-wishers expressed relief on social media. Aides blamed fatigue and dehydration and ruled out a stroke. “Thank you for waiting for me. I gave everybody a scare,” said Lee, who has been in power since 2004. He said he fainted during the speech, part of celebrations linked to Singapore’s 51st anniversary as a republic on August 9th. “I think that’s what happened. I’ve never had so many doctors look at me all at once, they think I’m all right. But anyway I’m going to have a full check-up after this.” Lee had been on his feet for more than two hours when he stunned the audience as he slouched over the lectern before cameras cut away to his listeners during a live broadcast. Lee underwent surgery for prostate cancer last year and has received the all-clear from doctors. He survived a bout of lymphoma, a form of cancer, in 1992.

ly-thi-nA Vietnamese woman has admitted to paying for her foot and part of her arm to be cut off in order to claim an insurance payout, police say. In May, the 30-year-old woman, named as “Ly Thi N”, pretended she had been hit by a train, the People’s Police Newspaper of Vietnam reports. But she has now reportedly admitted to having paid a friend $2,200 (£1,660) to sever her limbs. The aim was to claim more than $150,000 from her insurance company. A supposed bystander, “Doan Van D”, the same person who did the cutting, had called an ambulance after “finding” the injured woman on a Hanoi railroad. Pictures published by the official police newspaper showed the woman three months later, with her wounds healed. She is believed to run a struggling business, according to local media. Police have dropped the criminal investigation against both suspects, the Tuoi Tre newspaper reports, after all, she’s a bit armless and can’t run anywhere…

mbah-gothoAnd finally, the world’s oldest man has been named as Indonesian Mbah Gotho, who is 145 years old, with documentation that says he was born in 1870. Mr Gotho said he began preparing for his death in 1992, even having a gravestone made, but 24 years later he is still alive. He has now outlived all 10 of his siblings, his four wives and his children. Though his age is impressive, Mr Gotho told a regional news network: “What I want is to die.” For the past three months he has needed to bathed and spoon-fed, and is becoming increasingly frail. Mr Gotho has official documentation which shows his age, and the Indonesian records office says it has confirmed his birth date as December 31 1870. If this is correct, this would earn him the title of the oldest person ever, a title currently held by French centenarian Jeanne Calment, who was 122 when she died – 23 years younger than Mr Gotho. If the documents cannot be independently verified, however, Mr Gotho will not go down in the record books. There are a number of people who claim to have broken Jeanne Calment’s record, such as Nigerian James Olofintuyi, who claims to be 171, and Dhaqabo Ebba from Ethiopia, who claims to be 163, but without verifiable documents they cannot be given her title. The centenarian, from Central Java, says he spends his time listening to the radio, as his eyesight is no longer good enough to watch television. When asked the secret to a long life, he said: “The recipe is just patience”.

On This Day

Deaths

  • 1978 – Robert Shaw, English actor, screenwriter, and author (b. 1927)
  • 1987John Huston, American actor, director, and screenwriter (b. 1906)

Last Week’s Birthdays

Kenny Rogers (78), Carrie-Anne Moss (49), Alecia Witt (41), Hayden Panettiere (27), RJ Mitte (24), Usain Bolt (30), Tori Amos (53), Ty Burrell (49), Kirsten Wiig (43), Barbara Eden (85), Shelley Long (67), Steve Guttenberg (58), Dave Chappelle (43), Rupert Grint (28), Stephen Fry (59), Sean Connery (86), Tom Skerritt (83), Gene Simmons (67), Elvis Costello (62), Tim Burton (58), Billy Ray Cyrus (55), Claudia Schiffer (46), Rachel Bilson (35), Alexander Skarsgard (40), Melissa McCarthy (46) and Macauley Culkin (36).

The Last Word

“Oh, what’s the bloody point?”

  • Kenneth Williams, British actor and raconteur. This was the final entry in his diary.

Next week peeps!

Dead Pool 21st August 2016

Dead Pool Background

Finally we’ve had a notable  death at long last! Shân, Dave, Alex & Eliza all correctly guessed that João Havelange, the Brazilian football executive, would kick the bucket this year. 50 points each. We’re pretty much three quarters of the way through the year and the leader board is quite tight at the top so anything could happen!

Look Who You Could Have Had:

In Other News

charlie-websterTelevision presenter Charlie Webster “nearly died” after falling ill with a rare strain of malaria at the opening ceremony of the Olympics, according to her mother, shortly after completing a 3,000 mile charity ride to make it to the games. At first, doctors treating the 33-year-old from Sheffield thought she was suffering from exhaustion and dehydration when she felt unwell and started vomiting at the event a fortnight ago. But over the following few days, Webster’s health sharply deteriorated and her family said that she fell unconscious last Thursday, although news of the seriousness of her condition only publicly emerged a week later. The presenter – who has worked for Sky Sports and ITV – remains seriously ill with kidney failure, but has been taken out of an induced coma and can speak to family members by her bedside, according to a family statement. On Thursday, doctors said they are “very happy” with her “neurological results” suggesting she has not suffered any brain damage. However they cautioned that her kidneys were “still not responding to treatment and she remains on dialysis.”

british-nurse-pauline-cafferkeyPauline Cafferkey, the nurse who nearly died after contracting Ebola as a volunteer in west Africa, has been charged by a regulatory body with concealing her high temperature when she returned to the UK. Cafferkey, hailed as a hero for her work in the Ebola treatment units of Sierra Leone, could be struck off by the Nursing and Midwifery Council if the charges are proved against her. The NMC alleged that the Scottish nurse “allowed an incorrect temperature to be recorded” on 29th December 2014 and “intended to conceal from Public Health England staff that you had a temperature higher than 38˚C”. A high temperature is one of the first symptoms of Ebola haemorrhagic fever. NHS workers who returned from volunteering were all supposed to fill in questionnaires about their exposure to the virus in their patients and have their temperatures taken by PHE staff at Heathrow airport. Cafferkey nearly died twice – the first time after being diagnosed in Scotland. She was flown to London to be treated in a special tented Ebola isolation unit at the Royal Free hospital. Last October she developed meningitis as a result of the Ebola virus and had to be transferred to the Royal Free once more. Her condition became critical but she pulled through.

footPolice have renewed a public appeal for information after three human feet were discovered within a few hundred yards of each other. The first foot was found in Weston Park East in Bath, Somerset, in February, the second was discovered in the garden of a property in Weston Park in July, and the third in the garden of a property in Cranwells Park earlier this month. Avon and Somerset police said the first foot was more than likely to be an exhibit from a medical or educational establishment and was not the result of a crime. The force said it anticipated that inquiries into the second and third feet, which are still undergoing tests, are likely to come to the same conclusion. Temporary DI Paul Catton said: “We are confident no crime has been committed and strongly believe the feet have come from an old private collection. “All three feet show signs they have come into contact with animals and it is likely that they have been moved to the locations they were found from a specific source. Dare I quote Arthur Conan Doyle? “Come, Watson, come!’ he cried. ‘The game is afoot!”

kiteAnd finally, three people, including two children, have died after their throats were slit by glass-coated strings used for flying kites on India’s Independence Day. Saanchi Goyal, 3, and Harry, 4, were looking out through the sunroof of their cars in different parts of Delhi when sharp strings slit their throats. Zafar Khan, 22, died in the same manner when he was riding his motorbike. Glass-coated strings are used to bring down competitors’ kites, but they also end up injuring and killing people. Many Indians fly kites to celebrate festivals and important occasions like the Independence Day, which is celebrated on 15th August. But every year, there are reports of people dying or getting wounded from the kite strings – locally known as manja – treated with powdered glass or metal to sharpen them. The Delhi government has now banned the use of sharpened manja to fly kites and promised to run campaigns to educate people about the dangers of using such strings.

On This Day

Deaths

Last Weeks Birthdays

Steve Martin (71), Halle Berry (50), Mila Kunis (33), Magic Johnson (57), Ben Affleck (44), Natasha Henstridge (42), Jennifer Lawrence (26), Princess Anne (66), Julie Newmar (83), James Cameron (62), Madonna (58), Steve Carell (54), Ulrika Jonsson (49), Belinda Carlisle (58), Sean Penn (56), Donnie Wahlberg (48), Robert Redford (80), Denis Leary (59), Madeleine Stowe (58), Christian Slater (47), Edward Norton (47), Jim Carter (68), Matthew Perry (47), Bill Clinton (70), Robert Plant (68), Andrew Garfield (33) and Amy Adams (42).

The Last Word

“Let it be known that homosexuals are not cowards.” – Willem Arondeus, Dutch artist and writer, member of the Anti-Nazi resistance.

  • He led a group in bombing the Amsterdam Public Records Office, destroying thousands of files to prevent the Nazis from identifying Jews. Within a week, Arondeus and the other members of the group were arrested. Twelve, including Arondeus, were executed by firing squad.

Next week peeps!

Dead Pool 14th August 2016

Dead Pool Background

As yet another pointless edition of the Dead Pool lands in your inbox, we can only hope that next week brings in the names we need. Although this week did have people that we have actually heard of on the list, which makes a refreshing change!

Look Who You Could Have Had:

In Other News

RipperThe Yorkshire Ripper Peter Sutcliffe is set to move out of Broadmoor psychiatric hospital and back into jail after a mental health tribunal ruled him sane enough to do so, sources said. The serial killer, 70, has spent 32 years inside the high-security institution in Berkshire after murdering 13 women and attempting to murder seven more between 1976 and 1981. Sutcliffe, a former lorry driver from Bradford, now calls himself Peter Coonan. Most of his victims were prostitutes who were mutilated and beaten to death. The decision of the tribunal has been referred to the Ministry of Justice, which still needs to confirm the move. Sutcliffe was given 20 life terms for the murders and was caught when police found him with a prostitute in his car. A Ministry of Justice spokesman said: “Peter Coonan will remain locked up and will never be released for his evil crimes. ”Decisions over whether prisoners are to be sent back to prison from secure hospitals are based on clinical assessments made by independent medical staff. And I bet their assessment was, why waste more money on him, let the prison population deal with him once and for all.

CigarThe former Cuban leader Fidel Castro has made a rare public appearance at an event to mark his 90th birthday. He appeared at a gala in Havana’s Karl Marx Theatre with his brother, President Raul Castro, and Cuba’s ally, Venezuelan President Nicolas Maduro. In his first public appearance since April, he appeared frail and remained seated during the event. Too frail to smoke the 90 meter cigar rolled in his honour! The masterpiece took 10 days to create with the help of several assistants who worked 12 hours a day to roll the extraordinary cigar. It was presented on long tables in an old colonial fort overlooking the harbour of Havana.

PopePope Francis has surprised 20 former prostitutes by popping in for a visit at their house in Rome. The women had been rescued from their pimps and are being given shelter and protection at an apartment run by a Catholic charity in Italy’s capital. The pontiff ‘chatted’ to the women, some trafficked from Africa and elsewhere in Europe, for more than an hour! The 79-year-old cleric has repeatedly described human trafficking as a “crime against humanity”. The prostitutes were all aged about 30 and had “suffered serious physical abuse” and now lived under “Vatican protection”. Pope Francis encouraged the former sex workers “to be strong” as they started their new lives with the help of the Pope John XXIII Community. Sounds like our newish pontiff has plenty of spunk for a man of his age!

On This Day

Deaths

Last Week’s Birthdays

David Duchovny (56), Charlize Theron (41), Abbie Cornish (34), Dustin Hoffman (79), Roger Federer (35), Sam Elliott (72), Melanie Griffith (59), Gillian Anderson (48), Eric Bana (48), Anna Kendrick (31), Audrey Tautou (40), Rosanna Arquette (57), Antonio Banderas (56), Hulk Hogan (63), Chris Hemsworth (33), George Hamilton (77), Mark Knopfler (67), Bruce Greenwood (60) and Pete Sampras (45).

The Last Word

“The bastards tried to come over me last night. I guess they didn’t know I was a Marine”. – Private First Class Edward H. Ahrens

  • During the Battle of Tulagi, Private Ahrens was mortally wounded while single-handedly fighting back a group of Japanese soldiers attempting to infiltrate Allied lines. After his superior officer discovered Ahrens the next morning surrounded by dead Japanese troops, he whispered these words and died.

Next week peeps!