Dead Pool 27th December 2015

How’s this for commitment eh? A not-so-special post-Boxing Day edition of the Dead Pool. Yup, I spent half my Crimbo writing up this piece of tat just to keep you happy. Don’t worry though, I had plenty of time spare as they overlooked my space at the dining table and I had next to no presents to open, so here we are. I hope you all got to see The Queen looking as doddery as her husband at 3pm, surely 2016 is the year for both of them, but there’s only one way to find out, list them and send your deadly thirteen to me!

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Patricia Elliott, 77, American actress (A Little Night Music, One Life to Live), Tony Award winner (1973), leiomyosarcoma.
• Carol Burns, 68, Australian actress (Prisoner), cancer.
• Brooke McCarter, 52, American model and actor (The Lost Boys, Thrashin’), alpha 1-antitrypsin deficiency.
• Don Howe, 80, English football player (West Bromwich Albion, Arsenal, national team) and coach.

In Other News

Singer Janet Jackson has put her Unbreakable world tour on hold until spring to have surgery. Jackson said her doctors told her she needs an operation “soon”. “Please pray for me, my family and our entire company during this difficult time,” the 49-year-old asked fans. She said she would not be giving any details of her health condition. In 2008, Jackson cancelled a string of concert dates after developing migraine-associated vertigo, which might suggest that she’s got a brain bubble. “It breaks my heart to tell you that I am forced to postpone the Unbreakable Tour,” she said, adding that fans should hold on to their tickets. “They will be honoured in a special way when the new schedule is announced.” Would that be your funeral Janet?

Former Newcastle goalkeeper Pavel Srnicek is in a critical  condition in hospital after suffering cardiac arrest in the Czech Republic. According to information received by his agent Steve Wraith, the 47-year-old collapsed while out jogging in Ostrava on Sunday, which doesn’t surprise anyone. “I spoke to his family in the Czech Republic who said his heart had stopped,” Wraith told BBC Sport. “He is in a critical condition in hospital and remains unconscious.” Srnicek became a fans’ favourite during his first spell with the Magpies between 1991 and 1998. He was signed by manager Jim Smith and played under Ossie Ardiles, Kevin Keegan and latterly Kenny Dalglish, all of which are amazing names for your list!

The downhill skiing champion Marcel Hirscher escaped unharmed after a drone carrying a camera fell from the sky and narrowly missed him on his way down the slope during a race in Italy. The Austrian, who has won the overall World Cup title for the past four seasons, was on his second run of the slalom event at Madonna di Campiglio in Italy when the machinery smashed into the snow metres behind him. Hirscher appeared not to notice and continued his run, but afterwards he said: “This is horrible. This can never happen again. This can be a serious injury.” But we’re all hoping that it will!

And finally, a Montana man has been arrested on suspicion of threatening to shoot a student for divulging a plot line from the newly released Star Wars epic. Police say Arthur Roy, of Helena, got “angry” with a student he had befriended on Facebook after the boy gave up a subplot to Star Wars: The Force Awakens during an online conversation last week. During the online fight that ensued, Roy is alleged to have posted a photo of himself in which he appears to brandish a gun, which he indicates is a Colt 1911 with a “hair trigger”, according to a probable cause affidavit. The affidavit also says the boy was fearful Roy was going to come to “shoot him”. Roy also said he was “coming to find” the boy, whose school was placed on security “lockdown” after officials saw the exchange. Roy was arrested on Friday on suspicion of assault with a weapon, a felony. He made an initial appearance in Lewis and Clark county justice court on Monday, after which he was ordered held on $10,000 (£6,750) bail. Such a waste of resources, I could have easily told you that Chewy dies and Yoda’s babies have infiltrated the Imperial HQ as green larvae that need seeding by Luke’s special sauce, Oh, jesus turns up with a light sabre too!! Seriously, the film is that shit!

Oh… Michael Schumacher is still alive, just about. Whatever you have heard is false.

On This Day

• 1799 – Four thousand people attend George Washington‘s funeral where Henry Lee III declares him as “first in war, first in peace and first in the hearts of his countrymen.”
• 1846 – Trapped in snow in the Sierra Nevadas and without food, members of the Donner Party resort to cannibalism.
• 1862 – The largest mass-hanging in U.S. history took place in Mankato, Minnesota, 38 Native Americans died.
• 1898 – Marie and Pierre Curie announce the isolation of radium.
• 1982 – Time‘s Man of the Year is for the first time a non-human, the personal computer.
• 2004 – A 9.3 magnitude earthquake creates a tsunami causing devastation in Sri Lanka, India, Indonesia, Thailand, Malaysia, the Maldives and many other areas around the rim of the Indian Ocean, killing over 230,000.

Deaths

• 1972 – Harry S. Truman, American colonel and politician, 33rd President of the United States (b. 1884)
• 1977 – Howard Hawks, American director and screenwriter (b. 1896)
• 2001 – Nigel Hawthorne, English actor and producer (b. 1929)
• 2005 – Vincent Schiavelli, American actor (b. 1948)
• 2006 – Gerald Ford, American commander, lawyer, and politician, 38th President of the United States (b. 1913)
• 2012 – Gerry Anderson, English director, producer, and screenwriter (b. 1929)

Last Week’s Birthdays

Jane Fonda (78), Kit Harington (29), Samuel L. Jackson (67), Kiefer Sutherland (49), Jonah Hill (32), Sissy Spacek (66), Ricky Martin (44), Jared Leto (44), Annie Lennox (61), Phil Spector (76), Harry Shearer (72), July Delpy (46), Chris Evert (61), Phil Donohue (80), Ralph Fiennes (53), Vanessa Paradis (43), Lars Ulrich (52), He,ena Christensen (47), Dido (44), Stephenie Meyer (43) and Lemmy Kilmister (70).

End of year round up next folks!