Dead Pool 25th March 2018

Not good news for Eurovision fans, two related deaths this week, perhaps this is the tip of the iceberg for shit singers to perish. However, you are forgiven for not knowing anyone on the list this week. Obviously nil points to award this week.

Look Who You Could Have Had:

  • Yann Arnaud, 38, French Cirque du Soleil acrobat (Totem, Volta), fall.
  • Sudan, 45, Kenyan northern white rhinoceros, last known male of his subspecies, euthanised.
  • Katie Boyle, 91, Italian-born British actress, television personality and game-show panelist.
  • Fergus Anckorn, 99, British magician, longest-serving member of The Magic Circle.
  • Charles Lazarus, 94, American toy store executive (Toys “R” Us), respiratory failure.
  • Debbie Lee Carrington, 58, American actress and stuntwoman (Return of the Jedi, Total Recall, Bride of Chucky).
  • Lys Assia, 94, Swiss singer, winner of the first Eurovision Song Contest (1956).

In Other News

TV presenter Ant McPartlin has been charged with drink driving, the Metropolitan Police have confirmed. It follows his arrest after a collision on Sunday involving three vehicles in south-west London, where minor injuries were recorded. Mr McPartlin attended Kingston police station on Wednesday, where he was interviewed under caution. The presenter will appear at Wimbledon Magistrates’ Court on 4th April. The TV star could face up to six months in prison, an unlimited fine and a minimum driving ban of a year, if found guilty. Police said a 42-year-old man was arrested at the scene of the incident after failing a roadside breathalyser test. Mr McPartlin’s publicist subsequently confirmed the presenter would be taking time off from his TV commitments “for the foreseeable future” and would seek further treatment. He entered rehab in June 2017, after developing an addiction to prescription painkillers following a knee operation in 2015. He later said he was “overwhelmed” by the public support. Meanwhile, ITV confirmed on Wednesday that Declan Donnelly will present Saturday Night Takeaway on his own for the rest of this series. This Saturday’s show was cancelled after Mr McPartlin’s arrest, but the following two episodes, which will air on 31st March and 7th April, will now be presented solo by Donnelly.

Having cheated death five times, Colonel Gaddafi’s son is reportedly planning to run for the Libyan presidency. Saif al-Islam Gaddafi has already survived being sentenced to death by firing squad for alleged crimes that included incitement to murder and rape. The dictator’s son also appears to have been lucky to survive a Nato airstrike that wounded but didn’t kill him a month before his capture. Before that, in August 2011 he had been absent when a Nato airstrike flattened the country mansion near Tripoli where he kept and played with white tigers. He also seems to have counted himself lucky to have avoided the fate of his father, who in October 2011 after the fall of Tripoli was dragged from a drainage pipe near Sirte, sodomised with a bayonet and shot. Now his spokesman has reportedly announced he will be standing as presidential candidate on the ticket of the Popular Front for the Liberation of Libya, a party formed in December 2016 with a promise to liberate the country “from control of terrorist organisations”. If he were elected it would represent yet another turn in the fortunes of the 45-year-old who as a young man was regarded as “the Prince of Libya”, his father’s designated successor.

Another week passes, another snake charmer nearly dies after his python tried to strangle him during a live performance in Mau, a town in the northern Indian state of Uttar Pradesh. The man, whose name is not know, passed out in front of an audience after the snake wrapped itself around his neck. Those watching were unaware it was not part of the man’s act until he failed to get up. Onlookers then managed to wake the snake charmer with water while moving the snake away. He was taken to hospital in the nearby city of Varanasi. As you may remember, earlier this month, a Malaysian man famous for handling snakes died after being bitten by a cobra.

On This Day

  • 1199 – Richard I is wounded by a crossbow bolt while fighting France, leading to his death on April 6th.
  • 1306 – Robert the Bruce becomes King of Scots (Scotland).
  • 1655 – Saturn’s largest moon, Titan, is discovered by Christiaan Huygens.
  • 1807 – The Swansea and Mumbles Railway, then known as the Oystermouth Railway, becomes the first passenger-carrying railway in the world.


What would happen if an astronaut took off their helmet in space? 

Hint: it’s not good news… If an astronaut’s helmet was to accidentally come loose or come off completely in space, then obviously, this would be very bad news indeed. Remember that space is a vacuum, meaning that there are no particles floating around. When you are exposed to this, the air in your lungs has no choice but to be forced out through your mouth. Not too long after, your breathing motions will seem fairly normal despite their being no air to breathe until you die of oxygen deprivation. Contrary to popular science fiction, you won’t freeze instantly and your eyeballs won’t explode but you will become aware of the spit on your tongue boiling away, as well as your sweat. On the whole, you’ll experience a kind of fizzy feeling – almost like drinking a carbonated drink. Slightly more boring than what Hollywood would like you to believe.

 Last Week’s Birthdays

Jessica Chastain (41). Lara Flynn Boyle (48), Alyson Hannigan (44), Jim Parsons (45), Kelly LeBrock (58), The Undertaker (53), Mary Berry (83), Amanda Plummer (61), Joanna Page (40), Chaka Khan (65), Reese Witherspoon (42), William Shatner (87), M. Emmet Walsh (83), Andrew Lloyd Webber (70), Gary Oldman (60), Sonequa Martin-Green (33), Matthew Broderick (56), Timothy Dalton (72), Jaye Davidson (50), Rosie O’Donnell (56), Ruby Rose (32), David Thewlis (55), Holly Hunter (60), Spike Lee (61), William Hurt (68), Freema Agyeman (39), Carl Reiner (96), John de Lancie (70), Bruce Willis (63), Harvey ‘The Rapist’ Weinstein (66), Glenn Close (71), Ursula Andress (82), Brad Dourif (68), Luc Besson (59) and Irene Cara (59).

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