Last week we sent out the flying monkeys, and they didn’t disappoint. The second they took to the skies the news of Aretha Franklin’s impending death was sent to Dead Pool Towers. We were hoping to lead with the story of her illness, however she didn’t last the week. What is most surprising, none of you listed her. NOBODY!!!! If you only knew how much it costs to feed these flying monkeys and keep their wings supple with Nivea Cream, you’d try harder! Anyhow, a short newsletter this week, the news was slightly overrun by Ms Franklin’s death to notice anyone else. 

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Jill Janus, 42, American rock and roll singer (Huntress), suicide.  
• Aretha Franklin, 76, American Hall of Fame soul singer (“Respect”, “Chain of Fools”, “A Natural Woman”), pianist and songwriter, pancreatic cancer.   
• Sir Peter Tapsell, 88, British politician, MP (1959–1964, 1966–2015) and Father of the House of Commons (2010–2015).
• Kofi Annan, 80, Ghanaian diplomat, Secretary-General of the United Nations (1997–2006), Nobel Prize laureate (2001).

In Other News

Tesla shares have plunged after founder Elon Musk revealed to the New York Times he works “120 hour weeks” and takes sedatives. In the interview, Mr Musk also said he was not “on weed” when he controversially tweeted about taking the company private. “This past year has been the most difficult and painful year of my career,” he said. “It was excruciating.” At times during the interview he stopped speaking, seemingly overcome by emotion – and that he spent the full 24 hours of his birthday on 28th June working. “All night – no friends, nothing,” he said. Mr Musk also said that he took the sedative Ambien to help him sleep when he was not working: “It is often a choice of no sleep, or Ambien.” According to the paper, his use of the drug has concerned some board members. Just goes to show, money doesn’t make you happy and that Rosanne was right, Ambien does turn you into a knob.    

Whitney Houston was found dead in a bathtub in 2012 — and three years later, her daughter died in tragically similar circumstances. Now another death is a final tragic twist. The friend who discovered Whitney Houston’s daughter Bobbi Kristina Brown in her bathtub has died of an apparent drug overdose. Max Lomas was discovered unconscious in a friend’s bathroom with a syringe near his body after his pal grew concerned when he didn’t come out for a long time. Lomas was reportedly rushed to a nearby Mississippi hospital, where he later passed away. Lomas was the one who pulled Brown out of the bathtub and administered CPR with her partner, Nick Gordon, until help arrived. No charges were ever filed against Lomas, though Brown’s family won a $36 million wrongful death civil suit against Gordon for her death. Perhaps we should put Gordon up as a Maverick, everyone he comes into contact with dies, maybe it’s his turn next! 

On This Day

• 1612 – The “Samlesbury witches”, three women from the Lancashire village of Samlesbury, England, are put on trial, accused of practicing witchcraft, one of the most famous witch trials in British history.  
• 1692 – Salem witch trials: In Salem, Province of Massachusetts Bay, five people, one woman and four men, including a clergyman, are executed after being convicted of witchcraft.  
• 1839 – The French government announces that Louis Daguerre’s photographic process is a gift “free to the world” This is the day that the selfie was born.   
• 1987 – Hungerford massacre: In the United Kingdom, Michael Ryan kills sixteen people with a semi-automatic rifle and then commits suicide.

Deaths

• AD 14 – Augustus, Roman emperor (b. 63 BC)  
• 1977 – Groucho Marx, American comedian and actor (b. 1890)  
• 2005 – Mo Mowlam, English academic and politician, Chancellor of the Duchy of Lancaster (b. 1949)  
• 2012 – Tony Scott, English-American director and producer (b. 1944)

Last Week’s Birthdays

Robert Redford (82), Edward Norton (49), Christian Slater (49), Madeleine Stowe (60), Roman Polanski (85), Denis Leary (61), Robert De Niro (75), Sean Penn (58), Donnie Wahlberg (49), Belinda Carlisle (60), Steve Carell (56), James Cameron (64), Julie Newmar  (85), Evanna Lynch (27), Madonna (60), Jennifer Lawrence (28), Ben Affleck (46), Natasha Henstridge (44), Debra Messing (50), Jim Dale (83), Tony Robinson (72), Mila Kunis (35), Halle Berry (52), Steve Martin (73), Joseph Marcell (70) and Sarah Brightman (58).

Another relatively quiet week, I think we should send out the flying monkeys again, we could do with the demise of a high ranking Dead Pool star to spice things up.

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Charlotte Rae, 92, American actress (The Facts of Life, Diff’rent Strokes, 101 Dalmatians: The Series), bone cancer.  
• Joël Robuchon, 73, French chef and cookbook author, Meilleur Ouvrier de France winner 1976, complications from pancreatic cancer.  
• Nicholas Bett, 28, Kenyan hurdler, world champion (2015), traffic collision. 
• V. S. Naipaul, 85, Trinidadian-born British writer (A House for Mr Biswas), Nobel Prize laureate (2001).

In Other News 

Friends star Matthew Perry has undergone surgery after suffering a ruptured bowel, according to reports. A representative for the actor said that he was taken to an LA hospital to repair the perforation. Perry has been a vocal advocate of addiction recovery after struggling with alcohol abuse himself during his time on the show, admitting he has little memory of shooting three seasons. In 1997 and 2001 he completed time in rehab to recover from his use of Vicodin, methadone, amphetamines and alcohol. In 2013 he told ABC News: “Mostly it was drinking, you know, and opiates. I think I was pretty good at hiding it, but eventually people were aware. I honestly recoil. It’s scary to look at that. I was a sick guy.” 

Ant and Dec have postponed next year’s Saturday Night Takeaway, with the show not set to return until 2020. Dec Donnelly will also front November’s I’m A Celebrity…Get Me Out Of Here!’ alone, while Ant McPartlin continues to take a break from all TV presenting until 2019. They said it was a joint decision to postpone a new series of Takeaway. Ant stepped down from his TV work in March following his arrest on drink driving following a car crash. He was fined £86,000 and given a 20-month driving ban after pleading guilty to drink driving and announced he would immediately be taking time out from presenting and seeking treatment for addiction. In a statement Ant said his recovery is going “very well” and “for that to continue, having spoken to Dec and ITV, I have made the decision to take the rest of the year off”. He added: “I’d like to thank both Dec and ITV for their continued support and I look forward to getting back to work in the new year.”    

A coroner has ruled Superman actress Margot Kidder’s death was suicide. The 69-year-old actress was found dead at her home in Montana on 13th May. Park County Coroner’s office said she died “as a result of a self-inflicted drug and alcohol overdose”. A joint statement from the coroner’s office and her family urged “those suffering from mental illnesses, addiction and/or suicidal thoughts to seek appropriate counselling and treatment”. The actress found fame starring as Lois Lane alongside Christopher Reeve in the Superman films of the 1970s and 1980s. The actress, who had bipolar disorder, told People magazine in 1996 about her mental health problems and revealed that she had taken an overdose at 14 and suffered badly from mood swings. She gave the interview following her high-profile disappearance for several days in 1996 where she ended up living on the streets, paranoid that people were out to get her. 

On This Day

• 1865 – Joseph Lister, British surgeon and scientist, performs 1st antiseptic surgery.  
• 1883 – The last quagga dies at the Natura Artis Magistra, a zoo in Amsterdam, Netherlands.  
• 1953 – The first testing of a real thermonuclear weapon (not test devices): The Soviet atomic bomb project continues with the detonation of “RDS-6s” (Joe 4), the first Soviet thermonuclear bomb.  
• 1981 – The IBM Personal Computer is released.  
• 1985 – Japan Airlines Flight 123 crashes into Osutaka ridge in Gunma Prefecture, Japan, killing 520, to become the worst single-plane air disaster.

Deaths

• 30 BC– Cleopatra, Egyptian queen (b. 69 BC)  
• 1964 – Ian Fleming, English spy, journalist, and author (b. 1908)  
• 1982 – Henry Fonda, American actor (b. 1905)  
• 2009 – Les Paul, American guitarist and songwriter (b. 1915)  
• 2014 – Lauren Bacall, American model, actress, and singer (b. 1924)

Last Week’s Birthdays

Cara Delevingne (26), Sam J. Jones (64), Jim Beaver (68), Pete Sampras (47), Chris Hemsworth (35), Anna Gunn (50), Ian McDiarmid (74), Hulk Hogan (65), Antonio Banderas (58), Rosanna Arquette (59), Rhona Mitra (42), Anna Kendrick (33), Gillian Anderson (50), Sam Elliott (74), Eric Bana (50), Melanie Griffith (61), Audrey Tautou (42), McG (50), Dustin Hoffman (81), Charlize Theron (43), Abbie Cornish (36), Michael Shannon (44), David Duchovny (58), Tobin Bell (76), M. Night Shyamalan (48), Michelle Yeoh (56), Barbara Windsor (81) and Geri Horner (46).

Welcome fellow poolers, ’tis a sad day indeed where we can no longer  say “To me, to you.”  It’s now ‘To me, to… um…’ It’s been a terrible week if you’re a fan of wrestling too, they seem to be falling like flies. Anyhow, no points this week, better luck next time! 

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Brickhouse Brown, 57, American professional wrestler (SCW, WCWA, USWA), prostate cancer.  
• Brian Christopher, 46, American professional wrestler (WWF, TNA, USWA), suicide by hanging.   
• Nikolai Volkoff, 70, Yugoslav-born American Hall of Fame professional wrestler (WWF).  
• Tony Bullimore, 79, British sailor and nightclub owner, stomach cancer.  
• Sir Alex Fergusson, 69, British politician, Presiding Officer of the Scottish Parliament (2007–2011).   
• Mary Carlisle, 104, American actress (College Humor, Doctor Rhythm, Dead Men Walk).
• Rick Genest, 32, Canadian fashion model and actor (47 Ronin), suicide.  
• Barry Chuckle, 73, English children’s entertainer (ChuckleVision).

In Other News

Venezuelan President Nicolás Maduro says he has survived an assassination attempt involving explosive drones!!! Mr Maduro was speaking at a military event in Caracas when the alleged attack occurred. Live footage of his speech shows the president suddenly looking upwards – startled – and dozens of soldiers running away. Mr Maduro has blamed Colombia for the attack – something denied by Bogota as a “baseless” accusation. Seven soldiers were injured, and several people were later arrested, the Venezuelan authorities said. The incident happened when Mr Maduro was speaking at an event to mark the 81st anniversary of the national army. Two drones loaded with explosives went off near the president’s stand, Communications Minister Jorge Rodriguez said. Mr Maduro later said in a national address: “A flying object exploded near me, a big explosion. Seconds later there was a second explosion.” Photos on social media showed bodyguards protecting Mr Maduro with bulletproof shields after the alleged attack. To add further to the confusion, firefighters at the scene disputed the government’s version of events. Speaking on condition of anonymity, three of them said the incident was actually a gas tank explosion inside an apartment, but did not provide further details.       

Three-time Formula 1 world champion Niki Lauda is recovering in hospital after a lung transplant. The 69-year-old Austrian had been suffering from “severe lung disease”, Vienna General Hospital said in a statement. “The transplant was successfully carried out,” the statement added. Lauda won three world drivers’ titles in 1975, 1977 and 1984 with Ferrari and McLaren. He had cut short a holiday in Ibiza last week and returned to Vienna after developing a lung infection. Lauda was appointed as Mercedes’ non-executive chairman in 2012 and was involved in the signing of Lewis Hamilton to the team. In 1976, Lauda crashed into an embankment at the Nurburgring circuit in Germany. As flames engulfed his car, Lauda had to be rescued by his fellow drivers but despite suffering horrific burns and being given the last rites, he returned behind the wheel six weeks later.    

The coroner investigating the death of TV presenter Dale Winton has found he died of natural causes, the late star’s agent has revealed. The Supermarket Sweep and Hole in the Wall host was found dead in April at his north London home. He was 62. Scotland Yard previously said the star’s death was being treated as unexplained but not suspicious. 

On This Day

• 1305 – William Wallace, who led the Scottish resistance against England, is captured by the English near Glasgow and transported to London where he is put on trial and executed.   
• 1620 – The Mayflower departs from Southampton, England on its first attempt to reach North America.   
• 1926 – Harry Houdini performs his greatest feat, spending 91 minutes underwater in a sealed tank before escaping.

Deaths

• 1063 – Gruffydd ap Llywelyn, King of Gwynedd    
• 1955 – Carmen Miranda, Portuguese-Brazilian actress and singer (b. 1909)   
• 1962 – Marilyn Monroe, American model and actress (b. 1926)   
• 1984 – Richard Burton, Welsh-Swiss actor and producer (b. 1925)  
• 2000 – Alec Guinness, English actor (b. 1914)

Last Week’s Birthdays

Meghan Markle (37), Billy Bob Thornton (63), Barack Obama (57), Evangeline Lilly (39), Martin Sheen (78), John C. McGinley (59), Stephen Graham (45), John Landis (68), Steven Berkoff (81), Martha Stewart (77), Tony Bennett (92), Kevin Smith (48), Sam Worthington (42), Edward Furlong (41), Jason Momoa (39), Michael Biehn (62), Wesley Snipes (56), Dean Cain (52), Emilia Fox (44), J.K. Rowling (53), Christopher Nolan (48), Arnold Schwarzenegger (71), Lisa Kudrow (55), Hilary Swank (44), Laurence Fishburne (57), Jean Reno (70), Carel Struycken (70), Frances de la Tour (74), Wil Wheaton (46), David Warner (77), Elizabeth Berkley (46), Taylor Schilling (34) and Jonathan Rhys Meyers (41).

A surprised welcome to this weeks issue. Surprised because nobody had listed the world’s oldest living person, now dead. Never mind, she’d have only scored you 33 points anyway and she only became the oldest person on April, so maybe I’ll forgive you.

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Chiyo Miyako, 117, Japanese supercentenarian, world’s oldest living person.  
• Lucy Ferry, 58, British model and socialite, apparent suicide by gunshot.  
• Mary Ellis, 101, British WWII era transport pilot (R.A.F., A.T.A.).  
• Ellie Soutter, 18, British snowboarder (Team GB), suicide.   
• Alastair Yates, 66, British news anchor (BBC News, Sky News, About Anglia).

In Other News

Pop singer Demi Lovato is being treated in a Los Angeles hospital after a suspected drug overdose. The Los Angeles Police Department responded on Tuesday to a medical emergency in the Hollywood Hills, where the Sorry Not Sorry singer lives. The 25-year-old was reportedly found unconscious and treated at the scene with naloxone, an anti-opioid medicine. She is awake and breathing at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center, a family spokesman has said. “Demi is awake and with her family who want to express thanks to everyone for the love, prayers and support,” the spokesman told us at Dead Pool Towers. Lovato has struggled with substance abuse for years, and was feared to have relapsed in recent weeks. Her fans say the singer’s battles with bipolar disorder, bulimia and addiction – often documented in her music – have helped them with their own entitled little struggles. It is unclear what drugs Lovato overdosed on. Early reports said it was heroin but this was later contradicted.      

Former Manchester United manager Sir Alex Ferguson says he would “not be sitting here today” without the “great care” of hospital staff after his surgery for a brain haemorrhage in May. Ferguson, 76, has spoken publicly for the first time since going home from hospital in a video on social media. The Scot also thanked well wishers “for the support you have given me”. “It has made me feel so humble, as have all the messages I have received from all over the world,” he added. Ferguson had emergency surgery on 5th May and was in intensive care for several days at Salford Royal Hospital. If any of you  give a  shit, Ferguson retired as United manager in May 2013 after winning 38 trophies during 26 years in charge. The most successful manager in the history of the British game, his trophy haul at Old Trafford included 13 Premier League titles, two Champions League crowns, five FA Cups and four League Cups.    

Lightning strikes have forced Sir Tom Jones to cancel his comeback concert in York. The 78-year-old star had been due to return to performing on Friday, with a show at York Racecourse after a series of cancelled concerts due to illness. York Racecourse apologised and said it took the decision to cancel “given the atrocious weather conditions”. Singer James Arthur also had to cancel his open-air gig in Scarborough on Thursday because of lightning. Perhaps Mother Nature has a good music taste  after all…. Sir Tom pulled out of five shows this month after a bacterial infection, for which he was admitted to hospital. York Racecourse said it “shares the disappointment of the thousands of fans” for the last-minute cancellation and offered a “50% refund”. Fans took to social media to voice their frustrations over the cancellation and “poor” repayment offer. 

On This Day

• 1921 – Adolf Hitler becomes leader of the National Socialist German Workers Party. We all know that went well…. 
• 1967 – During the fourth day of celebrating its 400th anniversary, the city of Caracas, Venezuela is shaken by an earthquake, leaving approximately 500 dead. 
• 1981 – A worldwide television audience of over 700 million people watch the wedding of Charles, Prince of Wales, and Lady Diana Spencer at St Paul’s Cathedral in London. We all know that went well… 

Deaths

• 796 – Offa of Mercia (b. 730) 
• 1890 – Vincent van Gogh, Dutch painter and illustrator (b. 1853)  
• 1982 – Harold Sakata, American wrestler and actor (b. 1920)  
• 1983 – David Niven, English military officer and actor (b. 1910)  
• 2007 – Mike Reid, English comedian, actor, and author, Rrrrrriccccckey!!! (b. 1940)    

Last Week’s Birthdays

Daniel Radcliffe (29), Woody Harrelson (57), Charisma Carpenter (48), Ronny Cox (80), Slash (53), Jo Brand (61), Selena Gomez (26), Willem Dafoe (63), Rhys Ifans (51), Terence Stamp (80), Danny Glover (72), Louise Fletcher (84), Kate Beckinsale (45), Jason Statham (51), Sandra Bullock (54), Helen Mirren (73), Kevin Spacey (59), Eve Myles (40), Nana Visitor (61), Mick Jagger (75), Matt LeBlanc (51), Iman (63), Tera Patrick (42), Lynda Carter (67), Jennifer Lopez (49), Anna Paquin (36), Summer Glau (37), Danny Dyer (41), Nikolaj Coster-Waldau (48), Taylor Schilling (34) and Donnie Yen (55).

Afternoon Poolers. Let’s begin with some housekeeping. It was brought to my attention that I had forgotten to award some points last week when Peter Carrington died, luckily for Abi, Shan and Trish that Doug was on the ball and spotted my omission, so 51 points each!! It’s a bit of a slow week to be honest, so you are forgiven for not knowing who the hell these people are!    

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Gary Beach, 70, American actor (The Producers, Beauty and the Beast, La Cage aux Folles), Tony winner (2001).  
• Shinobu Hashimoto, 100, Japanese screenwriter (Seven Samurai, Rashomon, I Live in Fear), pneumonia.
• Adrian Cronauer, 79, American disc jockey (AFN), subject of Good Morning, Vietnam.
• Brickhouse Brown, 57, American professional wrestler (CWA, AWA, USWA), prostate cancer.  
• Jon Schnepp, 51, American animator, filmmaker and voice actor (Metalocalypse, Space Ghost Coast to Coast, The Death of “Superman Lives”), complications from a stroke.

In Other News

Sir Tom Jones has told fans he is “determined” to return to performing after being treated in hospital when he fell ill. The 78-year-old has called off four shows this week – three in the UK – due to a “bacterial infection”. Sir Tom has apologised to fans, and a Twitter  statement says he is in “good spirits” and the condition is being “well managed under doctor’s orders”. “Appropriate recovery time and rest is advised,” the statement added. The Grammy and Brit award-winning superstar – a judge on The Voice UK Saturday night TV show – was due to perform at Stansted Park near Portsmouth on Wednesday and Chester Racecourse on Thursday. The It’s Not Unusual singer cancelled his US tour last September, five days before it was due to start. Sir Tom later revealed he had had to have a hip replacement.  

Television and radio presenter Richard Bacon has paid tribute to his wife Rebecca ahead of his expected release from hospital. The 42-year-old, who lives in Los Angeles, became ill on a flight from the US with suspected pneumonia. He was later put into a coma to allow his body to fight the infection. Bacon tweeted: “Last full day in hospital. Every facet of my life would be worse without Rebecca in it. How will I ever thank her?” The message continued: “I was in a coma for nine or ten nights (I just learned). That’s a lot of staring at your husband and his pipes. And a lot of worry. Former Blue Peter presenter Bacon, who was born in Mansfield, Nottinghamshire, said he had been diagnosed with an “unidentified double chest infection”. On Monday he posted on social media saying he had “nearly died”. “At one point, as I was run down a hallway to ICU (an intensive care unit) at midnight, with a massive needle jammed in my chest – bit like Pulp Fiction – I thought, ‘This is it.’”   

Former Emmerdale star Roxanne Pallett is said to be “lucky to be alive” after crashing into a concrete wall at high speed. The actor, 35, was airlifted to hospital after losing consciousness for 30 seconds at a stock race in Hunmanby Raceway near Scarborough. Pallett was rescued by firefighters who spent two hours cutting her from the wreckage before a helicopter transported her to Hull Royal Infirmary 41 miles away. The star – who was racing her Minister FM breakfast show co-host Ben Fry – is reportedly awaiting results of a CT scan and has suffered severe bruising. They were racing to promote the Outlaw Gold Top Shootout event scheduled to take place on 11th August. Pallett starred in Emmerdale as Jo Stiles nee Sugden on the ITV soap between 2005-08. More recently, she starred in BBC series Waterloo Road and will star in forthcoming horror film Habit.   

And just when you thought most people were normal, thousands of people have signed a petition to drink the red liquid found in a 2000-year-old  sarcophagus. Speculation and mystery has surrounded the strange black granite box since it was found in Alexandria earlier this month and some even suggested that it should not be opened, for fear that it could unleash a hideous curse. Upon finally being opened archaeologists found it was filled with dirty water and three skeletons, according to Egypt’s Ministry of Antiquities. The water probably found its way into the box from a sewage trench, the ministry said. It may have caused the mummies to decompose and leave only their skeletons. The bodies are probably those of warriors. One of them appears to have a wound that is the result of being hit by an arrow. Should you feel the need to drink this unholy juice, please feel free to sign the petition and fuck off out of my life. 

On This Day

• 1797 – Battle of Santa Cruz de Tenerife: Battle between Spanish and British naval forces during the French Revolutionary Wars. During the Battle, Rear-Admiral Nelson is wounded in the arm and the arm had to be partially amputated.
• 1942 – The Holocaust in Poland: The systematic deportation of Jews from the Warsaw ghetto begins.
• 2005 – Jean Charles de Menezes is killed by police as the hunt begins for the London Bombers responsible for the 7 July 2005 London bombings and the 21 July 2005 London bombings.

Deaths

• 2004 – Sacha Distel, French singer and guitarist (b. 1933)  
• 2008 – Estelle Getty, American actress (b. 1923)

Last Week’s Birthdays

Paloma Faith (37), John Woodvine (89), Ross Kemp (54), Diana Rigg (80), John Francis Daley (33), Gisele Bündchen (38), Benedict Cumberbatch (42), Jared Padalecki (36), Ramin Djawadi (44), Brian May (71), Kristen Bell (38), Vin Diesel (51), Donald Sutherland (83), Alex Winter (53), David Hasselhoff (66), Will Ferrell (51), Phoebe Cates (55), Corey Feldman (47), Travis Fimmel (39), Diane Kruger (42), Forest Whitaker (57), Jan-Michael Vincent (74), Brigitte Nielsen (55), Celia Imrie (66) and Jesse Ventura (67).