As mentioned in last weeks telegram messages, I haven’t forgot anyone who had Marsha Hunt last week, well done all of you. The points have been updated accordingly; and talking about points, I scored again! With the assisted suicide of Jean-Luc Godard, I scored 59 points! Go me! 

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Jean-Luc Godard, 91, French-Swiss film director (Breathless, Bande à part, Pierrot le Fou), screenwriter and film critic, assisted suicide. 
• Harry Landis, 90, British actor (EastEnders, Friday Night Dinner, Bitter Victory) and stage director.  
• Gwyneth Powell, 76, English actress (Grange Hill, Man Down, The Guardians), complications from colon surgery.
• Ken Starr, 76, American lawyer (Whitewater controversy), complications from surgery. 
• Irene Papas, 93, Greek actress (Zorba the Greek, The Guns of Navarone, Z) and singer, complications from Alzheimer’s disease.  
• Henry Silva, 95, American actor (Ocean’s 11, The Manchurian Candidate, Ghost Dog: The Way of the Samurai).  
• Eddie Butler, 65, Welsh rugby union player (British & Irish Lions, Barbarian F.C., national team), commentator and journalist. 

In Other News

Japan’s oldest man – who survived the Hiroshima atomic bombing and fought in World War II – has died at the age of 112, authorities announced. Mikizo Ueda died in a nursing home in Nara city of Japan on 9th September. The country which has one of the highest life expectancy rates in the world hit a record number of centenarians with an estimated 86,510 people aged 100 years or over last year, according to federal data. Japan has one of the most numbers of people who have been certified by Guinness World Records as the world’s oldest people alive. Mikizo was born in May 1910 in Kyoto and moved to Osaka after the death of his family. He worked in the finance division of the Wakayama Prefectural Office, according to Global Super Centenarian Forum. Mikizo served in the Navy during World War II and witnessed the atomic bombing of Hiroshima. He was passionate about the traditional Japanese way of writing poems, known as haiku, and published book under the pseudonym Morihiko Ueda. The health ministry of Japan will now announce plans to celebrate the country’s oldest living individual, Fusa Tatsum, on 16th September, according to local media reports. Ms Fusa is a 115-year-old woman who lives in Kashiwara city, 20 kilometres away from central Osaka in Japan. The woman used to work in a family orchard where she grew plums, peaches and grapes until she was about 55 years old. She learnt to play Japan’s classical musical instrument known as an Okoto and studied flower arrangement. The death of Mikizo comes as Guinness World Records holder for the oldest living person in 2019, died in April this year at the age of 119. Kane Tanaka was living at a nursing home and was in relatively good health until recently, enjoying playing board games, solving maths problems, drinking soda and eating chocolate. 

The free climber known as the “French Spiderman” has inexplicably celebrated his 60th birthday by scaling a 187-metre Paris skyscraper. Alain Robert was pictured climbing up the Tour TotalEnergies building in the La Defense business district on Saturday. Without the help of ropes or a safety harness, the idiot clung to the 48-storey tower’s window frames using only his hands, reaching the top of the building in 60 minutes. His 60th birthday was last month. The climber has conquered Tour TotalEnergies numerous times in the past. “I promised myself several years ago that when I reached 60, I would climb that tower again because 60 symbolises retirement age in France and I thought that was a nice touch,” he said. When he reached the top, he raised his arms above his head to celebrate, while those on the ground cheered. After the feat, an elated Mr Robert told the flying monkeys: “I want to send people the message that being 60 years old is nothing. You can still do sport, be active, do fabulous things.” To climb the tower, Mr Robert – who began climbing in the 1970s – had only a red jumpsuit, climbing shoes, a bottle of water, and a small bag of chalk to wipe away sweat – which could cause him to slip and fall.

On This Day

• 1879 – The Blackpool Illuminations are switched on for the first time. 
• 1906 – The 1906 Hong Kong typhoon kills an estimated 10,000 people 
• 1977 – Voyager I takes the first distant photograph of the Earth and the Moon together. 
• 2012 – Greater Manchester Police officers PC Nicola Hughes and PC Fiona Bone are murdered in a gun and grenade ambush attack in Greater Manchester, England. 

Deaths

• 1970 – Jimi Hendrix, American singer-songwriter, guitarist, and producer (b. 1942). 
• 2004 – Russ Meyer, American director, producer, and screenwriter (b. 1922). 
• 2020 – Ruth Bader Ginsburg, United States Supreme Court justice (b. 1933). 

Inside British newsrooms on the day Queen Elizabeth II died

If, like me, you are bored to death with all the royal coverage, you might be more interested in what happened behind the scenes prior to any announcement being made of HRH’s death. 

The journey towards the1 first monarchical transition in 70 years came with the passing of a note. At 12.21pm on Thursday, as new Prime Minister Liz Truss and Labour leader Keir Starmer battled at the dispatch box over Truss’s announcement on energy bills, attention focused more on what was happening behind them. 

A folded-up piece of paper was passed along both front benches, and the country knew something was up by the looks on the faces of those who read the note. “It was fucking weird because as soon as the note went round everyone kind of knew and was going: ‘She’s dead,’ right,” says one Whitehall correspondent for a national newspaper. (Like all those quoted in this story, they were given anonymity in order to speak freely.) “Then it’s been waiting and knowing without knowing, writing other stuff under the pretence it’s not all going to be scrapped.” 

The correspondent was told by editors to write on the major political stories of the day – an unfunded promise to limit energy bills, the settling in of a new prime minister and the creation of her government – that they knew would never be read.

Thirteen minutes after the note came the tweet. “Following further evaluation this morning, the Queen’s doctors are concerned for Her Majesty’s health and have recommended she remain under medical supervision,” wrote Buckingham Palace. “The Queen remains comfortable and at Balmoral.”

“When the statement dropped about her health it was obvious, and suddenly no MPs would talk,” the Whitehall correspondent says. Labour and Liberal Democrat MPs stopped responding to messages.

Across at what was once known as Fleet Street, time stopped.

Unlike the April 2021 death of the Duke of Edinburgh, which was announced out of the blue, says one BBC journalist, the announcement that the Queen was “comfortable” but doctors were “concerned” was a coded message: get ready. “She obviously didn’t look well on Tuesday with Truss,” says the BBC journalist. “No idea it was imminent though. They gave us a six-hour run up with the ‘comfortable’ announcement, which is preferable to just dropping on wires like they did with the Duke of Edinburgh.” It gave on-air correspondents time to switch into black ties, a formal rule that broadcasters follow after controversy when one of their predecessors announced the death of the Queen Mother in 2002 wearing a maroon tie and was castigated for it. (Huw Edwards, the BBC anchor who would end up breaking the news to the nation, switched into a black tie just before 2pm.)

At another national newspaper, staff kept being pulled out of a midday meeting to work on stories around the sudden turn in the Queen’s health. Eventually, the meeting was disbanded, according to one staffer. “I checked in with other editors who took the right decision to cancel on me because they needed to tear up pages and rewrite pieces from years back with new info,” says the second newspaper journalist. A first version of a front page announcing the Queen’s death was  drawn up by mid-afternoon – based on a hunch that events would move quickly. Push notifications were disabled for fear of saying the wrong thing at the wrong moment (a consideration The Times forgot about for their banner advertising a flash sale).

At The Times, things were more chaotic. Old stories, pre-written in preparation for the day, were being dusted off in anticipation of the worst. One journalist with knowledge of the newsroom says the tech team was assembled into making sure the website didn’t fall over at a key moment; the paper prepared an obituary that was published with the wrong date of the Queen’s death, marking it as 9 September, not the 8th.

For The Guardian, one story, first published in 2017, became a huge driver of traffic. ‘London Bridge is down‘ details the meticulous preparations for the Queen’s death, and how the country’s institutions would react. At its peak on Thursday, the story was being viewed 8,000 times a minute, according to internal Guardian data. Search terms that drove traffic to the page included “London bridge is down”, “London bridge has fallen”, and “what happens when the queen dies”.  At a major commercial radio station, one producer described events as “chaos”. “We had to do our show as usual just waiting for the official announcement,” they told me in the late afternoon, “which still hasn’t come.” The producers were caught in limbo, covering issues with the Queen’s health while also paying lip service to the massive energy announcement unveiled just hours earlier. They were “just waiting for the official palace announcement which then means we can drop everything and go all guns blazing.”

At 1.15pm, radio stations were half-heartedly planning non-royal news for later that night. I was contacted by a broadcast producer asking to talk on the radio around 5.30pm about this week’s new iPhone announcements. I joked that I’d very lightly pencil it in – and wouldn’t be offended when they inevitably cancelled. They laughed before hanging up, recognising what was coming.

That the announcement would come felt inevitable. “We saw Truss and Starmer get handed notes,” says the commercial radio producer. “When I saw that, my heart sank. I knew straight away. We all did.” 

It’s a sentiment many journalists have. Potentially the biggest news story of their lives, it’s also the one that no one wants to be carrying the can for. “I feel like I’ve had a couple of close calls when I’ve been off-shift amid rumour and fears she’d die in the recent past,” says one producer at an international TV station. “It broke with pinging, angry shouting and the urgent need to get royal voices onto the air to fill the on-screen void the story created.” For hours, royal biographers, historians and experts were in demand. “They’re tough booking,” admits the TV producer. “Their phones were ringing off the hook; the higher profile ones are locked out and retained in deals done years ago. My channel had a plan and so far so good.”

Yet for all the hard work, theirs is not the channel most people turn to for major events. “I feel violently sick,” one broadcast journalist working for the BBC told me, mid-afternoon, after it was known Elizabeth was gravely ill, but before her death was announced. The BBC’s bullpen newsroom, which takes up an entire floor at Broadcasting House and acts as the live-action backdrop for news programmes, was becoming crowded.

It wasn’t just journalists booked for shifts that day. Flagship presenters from BBC Radio 4’s Today programme were called in to cover the news that was expected. Bosses who are rarely seen in the office suddenly felt the need to be there and steer the coverage.

Some staff were lucky to stay away, having dodged the bullet of being on shift on the day the Queen died. “It’s very weird watching something play out that we’ve all been preparing and rehearsing for pretty much our entire careers,” says a third BBC journalist. “I know the protocol and sequence of events almost instinctively from obit rehearsals and briefings that have happened with increased regularity over the years.” (There’s usually one every three to six months; the journalist says the most recent run-through was relatively recently. Scripts are pre-written and carefully defined, and set up on autocues to read in the event of a royal death.) “But actually watching it, it’s sort of an out of body experience. God knows how Huw [Edwards] must feel in the middle of all this.”

It was through another tweet from Buckingham Palace, and a special broadcast that blocked out many BBC TV channels, that most people learned of the Queen’s death at 6.30pm. BBC2 interrupted athletics coverage; Channel 4 butted into a standoff on Hollyoaks. Like all of us, Buckingham Palace’s tweet is how many journalists found out about the epoch-changing news. The commercial radio producer saw the Palace’s tweet and shared it with around half a dozen colleagues sitting in the studio, who had been broadcasting conjecture about the news for nearly six hours by then.

And still, they waited. It’s not the sort of thing you can afford to get wrong – though plenty did, with a flurry of tweets around 3.07pm from the likes of the BBC’s Yalda Hakim, Sky News’s Inzamam Rashid and Guido Fawkes, all announcing the Queen’s death prematurely.

They checked with the editor of the programme that they were OK to announce the news. They flicked a switch, turning the lighting black and went into “obit mode”. A pre-recorded obituary was played after the announcement was made. “Now we’re just rolling,” they say.

Last Week’s Birthdays

Jason Sudeikis (47), Jada Pinkett Smith (51), Keeley Hazell (36), Tim McInnerny (66), Cassandra Peterson (71), Mickey Rourke (70), Jennifer Tilly (64), Madeline Zima (37), Amy Poehler (51), Danny John-Jules (62), Tom Hardy (45), John Bradley (34), Tommy Lee Jones (76), Oliver Stone (76), Brendan O’Carroll (67), Prince Harry (38), Jimmy Carr (50), Sam Neill (75), Andrew Lincoln (49), Walter Koenig (86), Alfie Allen (36), and Linda Gray (82).

There you go folks, an end to an era. With great sadness  we say goodbye to HRH Queen Elizabeth II, a figure of enduring stability in all our lives. 

However, this game takes no prisoners, so points must be awarded to the following: 154 points go to Nickie, Ceri, Iwan, Lee, Gwenan, and Julia as they listed her majesty as either a Cert or their Woman, and 54 points go to Trish, Shân, Millie, Laura, Scott, Liz, Debbie, and Paula. Well done everyone, certainly mixed up the league table. 

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Queen Elizabeth II, 96, British monarch and head of the Commonwealth (since 1952). 
• Marsha Hunt, 104, American actress (Pride and Prejudice, Blossoms in the Dust, The Human Comedy). 
• Just Jaeckin, 82, French film director (Emmanuelle, Story of O, Lady Chatterley’s Lover), photographer and sculptor.  

In Other Royal News

With the death of Queen Elizabeth II, many iconic goods, symbols and titles will have to change. Coins, stamps and medals will no longer bear the Queen’s distinctive side profile, but that of her son and heir King Charles III. A new flag and coat of arms will be designed for the new monarch and the most famous anthem of all will, of course, have to be tweaked. Even senior barristers – known as Queen’s Counsel (QC) for 70 years – will have to adapt to the new moniker of King’s Counsel (KC).

Here is a breakdown of some of the iconic changes that will happen.    

Historically, coins played a significant role in spreading the fame of kings. This is because, for many people, the image of the king on coins was the only likeness of the monarch they were likely to see in their lifetimes. During Queen Elizabeth II’s reign there were five representations of the monarch on coins in circulation. The original coin portrait of the Queen was by Mary Gillick and was adopted at the beginning of her reign in 1952. She was later photographed by Arnold Machin OBE, and an approved portrait entered circulation in 1968. A third portrait, by Raphael Maklouf was adopted in 1985, followed by a portrait by Ian Rank-Broadly in 1998. The final portrait was introduced in 2015 and was created by Jody Clark. It shows the Queen wearing the diamond diadem, as she did when travelling to the state opening of parliament. But what will happen to stamps, coins and notes when Charles becomes king? Here’s what we know. 

Following in his mother’s footsteps, it is believed Charles will sit for a new portrait to be used on all new coins, notes and stamps that enter circulation after he takes the throne. Coins bearing the portrait of the Queen will likely continue to be issued in the immediate future, and all currency bearing her portrait will still be valid for use. The switch to new currency and stamps will be a gradual process, with banks and post offices gradually collecting the old designs. It is likely that many people will be keen to hold onto their coins as a keepsake of the Queen. Since the 1600s, during the reign of Charles II, royal tradition has dictated that monarchs should be represented on coins facing in the opposite direction to their predecessor. This means that when Charles becomes king, his portrait will face left, as the Queen’s faced towards the right. 

What will change for King Charles III himself? Charles’s signature will change. Before it was simply “Charles”. Now it will be the name he has taken as king with an additional R for Rex – Latin for king – at the end. In criminal court cases, the R to denote the Crown now stands for Rex rather than Regina (queen). Charles will also  need a new personal flag as King. In 1960, the Queen adopted a personal flag – a gold E with the royal crown surrounded by a chaplet of roses on a blue background – to be flown on any building, ship, car or aircraft in which she was staying or travelling. It was often used when she visited Commonwealth countries. While the royal standard represents the sovereign and the United Kingdom, the Queen’s own flag was personal to her alone and could be flown by no one other than the Queen. 

The royal coat of arms, adopted at the start of Queen Victoria’s reign in 1837, will remain the same. But just as when the Queen became monarch, it is likely that new artwork will be issued early in Charles’s reign by the College of Arms for use by public service bodies such as the civil service and the armed forces. The “very light rebranding” will be hard to spot, but it signifies the opportunity to replace old images, which have been in use for many decades, with newer, differently stylised ones.  

A lookalike of Queen Elizabeth II has said she is quitting the job after 34 years “out of respect” following the monarch’s death, but will still keep her outfits in memory of a woman who “felt like part of the family”. Mary Reynolds, 89, who lives in Epping, Essex, first became a lookalike in 1988 but was first told she looked like the late monarch when she was 17. She has appeared in television and film, with some of her standout moments including starring in the 1990 comedy film Bullseye with the late Sir Roger Moore, as well as an episode in the 25th anniversary series of Doctor Who in 1988. Ms Reynolds told the Flying Monkeys she felt “lucky” to look like the Queen, but that her days as a doppelgänger are to come to an end. “It’s been a great privilege to look like her because I think she’s so incredible,” Ms Reynolds said. “I mean, it’s a change of an era now, it’s all going to be very weird. I was watching the television the day before and felt that there was going to be some bad news, which of course eventually came and it makes you feel very, very, very sad. And then you do sort of realise that will be the end as far as I’m concerned… out of respect, I don’t think one should do anything.” Ms Reynolds said she had been approached by a Russian television company after the Queen’s death on Thursday asking her to don her impersonator outfit. “There was something about a Russian television company wanting to do something with me and they wanted to see me dressed up and I said, the only way I would dress up as the Queen would be in a black dress,” she said. The decision to leave her role as a lookalike has made Ms Reynolds “very sad”. “I’ve just moved home… and I’ve got two boxes full of hats and I’ve just found somewhere to put them and I thought: I’m not really going to need them any more,” she said. “It makes you feel very sad. I’ve had all these years of doing the work and it has helped me earn some money, but at the same time it was a pleasure for people to see you and say: ‘It’s the Queen.’ Wherever you went in the world, it was the Queen – not Queen Elizabeth, not the Queen of England, it was the Queen. There will never be anyone like her.”

On This Day

• 1826 – Captain William Morgan, an ex-freemason is arrested in Batavia, New York for debt after declaring that he would publish The Mysteries of Free Masonry, a book against Freemasonry. This sets into motion the events that led to his mysterious disappearance.
• 1941 – Construction begins on The Pentagon.
• 1997 – After a nationwide referendum, Scotland votes to establish a devolved parliament within the United Kingdom.
• 2001 – The September 11 attacks, a series of coordinated terrorist attacks killing 2,996 people using four aircraft hijacked by 19 members of al-Qaeda. Two aircraft crash into the World Trade Centre in New York City, a third crashes into The Pentagon in Arlington County, Virginia, and a fourth into a field near Shanksville, Pennsylvania.
• 2007 – Russia tests the largest conventional weapon ever, the Father of All Bombs.
• 2015 – A crane collapses onto the Masjid al-Haram mosque in Saudi Arabia, killing 111 people and injuring 394 others.

Deaths

• 1957 – Mary Proctor, American astronomer (b. 1862)
• 1971 – Nikita Khrushchev, Russian general and politician (b. 1894)
• 1987 – Lorne Greene, Canadian actor (b. 1915)
• 1988 – Roger Hargreaves, English author and illustrator (b. 1935)
• 1994 – Jessica Tandy, English-American actress (b. 1909)
• 2002 – Kim Hunter, American actress (b. 1922)
• 2003 – John Ritter, American actor (b. 1948)
• 2011 – Andy Whitfield, Welsh actor and model (b. 1971)
• 2014 – Donald Sinden, English actor (b. 1923)

Last Week’s Birthdays

Tyler Hoechlin (35), Virginia Madsen (61), Roxann Dawson (64), Elizabeth Henstridge (35), Johnny Vegas (51), Guy Ritchie (54), Colin Firth (62), Adam Sandler (56), Hugh Grant (62), Henry Thomas (51), Jeffrey Combs (68), Eric Stonestreet (51), Michael Bublé (47), Gaten Matarazzo (20), Martin Freeman (51), Heather Thomas (65), Pink (43), Rachel Hunter (53), Miles Jupp (43), Evan Rachel Wood (35), Shannon Elizabeth (49), Toby Jones (56), Doug Bradley (68), Julie Kavner (72), Leslie Jones (55), Chrissie Hynde (71), Idris Elba (50), Freya Allan (21), Paddy Considine (49), Carice van Houten (46), Michael Keaton (71), Raquel Welch (82), Rose McGowan (49), Bob Newhart (93), and George Lazenby (83).

Let’s begin with awarding the points! 59 points to Martin and Lee for correctly guessing  Gorbachev, and again to Martin for also guessing Bill Turnbull, along with Mark, Chrissie and myself, finally breaking my duck! 84 points each! 

We also have a guest writer today, thanks Neil for the excellent essay below. If anybody would like to contribute, just email your work to the usual address. 

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Mikhail Gorbachev, 91, Russian politician, president of the Soviet Union (1990–1991). 
• Mark Shreeve, 65, British electronic music composer (Redshift) and songwriter (“Touch Me (I Want Your Body)”). 
• Bill Turnbull, 66, British journalist and presenter (BBC Breakfast, Songs of Praise, Think Tank), prostate cancer.  
• Diane Noomin, 75, American underground cartoonist and editor (Wimmen’s Comix, Twisted Sisters). 
• Frank Drake, 92, American astronomer and astrophysicist (Drake equation), designer of the Arecibo message. 
• Drummie Zeb, 62, English reggae musician (Aswad) and record producer. 

In Other News

Hairy Bikers star Dave Myers has said he “misses” his beard after losing it while undergoing chemotherapy. The TV personality and chef shared an update on his cancer diagnosis during a chat with on-screen partner Si King. “It’s the beard I miss, though,” Myers said during an episode of his podcast Agony Uncles, adding: “I was born with that beard.” He added: ”I just miss having my beard – the feeling of it, because your skin’s different and all peachy. No, I want my beard back. I’m alright with my hair – I think the bald head and beard’s the way to go for a biker.” He added that he’s “doing OK under the circumstances”. Myers first revealed his diagnosis on the podcast in May, telling listeners he would be taking a step back from filming and attending food festivals throughout the summer. “Anyway Kingy, I’ve got to come clean now,” he said. “I haven’t been too well recently and basically, I’ve got to have some chemo, you know all this anyway, so this year is going to be a bit quiet for me. I’m not going to be filming, some of the festivals I’m not going to be able to go to, some I may be OK but this year’s a bit of a write off for us.” The 64-year-old continued: “I would love it if people respected my privacy and just let me get on with it and give Si and our team all the support they need, that would be great.  

Argentina’s vice-president, Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner, survived an assassination attempt late on Thursday after a man with a loaded gun tried and failed to shoot her. Video footage of the incident showed a man holding a pistol inches away from the vice president’s head as she greeted supporters. Ms Fernandez de Kirchner was unharmed in the incident. On Thursday, President Alberto Fernandez confirmed in a televised address that a man attempted to kill the vice-president while she was surrounded by hordes of supporters outside her Buenos Aires home. “A man pointed a firearm at her head and pulled the trigger. Cristina is still alive because – for some reason we can’t technically confirm at this moment – the weapon, which was armed with five bullets, did not shoot although the trigger was pulled,” he explained, before adding: “We must eradicate hate and violence from our media and political discourse.” Mr Fernandez declared Friday a national holiday in an effort to show support for the vice-president. A suspect was arrested seconds after the attempted attack and Argentina’s official news agency, Telam, identified the man as 35-year-old Brazilian national Fernando Andre Sabag Montiel. The Argentine Ministry of Security also reportedly confirmed the weapon was a .380 firearm with cartridges inside. The attack on the vice-president comes amid rising political tension in the country and the region that has put politicians on edge from Colombia to Brazil.   

Just when you thought that executives jumping out of windows was a thing of the past… A man jumped to his death from the 18th floor of the famous ‘Jenga’ tower in lower Manhattan’s Tribeca neighbourhood on Friday. He’s been identified as a Bed Bath & Beyond executive. Gustavo Arnal, 52, was the Chief Financial Officer of Bed Bath & Beyond, a company that has been going through struggles of late due to high inflation and a sagging economy. The company announced plans to close 150 stores, of its roughly 900, and lay off 20 percent of staff just two days before Arnal’s death. He reportedly sold over 42,000 shares in the company, oft-identified as a ‘meme stock’, for $1million just over two weeks ago. At the time, he still owned 267,896 shares in the company, valued at just under $6.5million.  Arnal moved to Bed Bath & Beyond in 2020 – when the company was already struggling due to the coronavirus pandemic – from London-based cosmetics giant Avon, where he was also CFO, and had spent 20 years at Proctor & Gamble. When Arnal was brought to Bed Bath & Beyond in April 2020 a company spokesman said in a statement they were ‘bringing in world class talent to offer new perspectives, expertise and experience as we rebuild our business.’ Little did they know that said perspective was from a high rise window. So, with the world going to shit, perhaps a few powerful businessmen might be worth listing next year. 

On This Day

• 1693 – Date traditionally ascribed to Dom Perignon‘s invention of champagne; it is not clear whether he actually invented champagne, however he has been credited as an innovator who developed the techniques used to perfect sparkling wine.
• 1892 – The father and stepmother of Lizzie Borden are found murdered in their Fall River, Massachusetts home. She will be tried and acquitted for the crimes a year later.
• 1944 – The Holocaust: A tip from a Dutch informer leads the Gestapo to a sealed-off area in an Amsterdam warehouse, where they find and arrest Jewish diarist Anne Frank, her family, and four others.
• 2020 – At least 220 people are killed and over 5,000 are wounded when 2,700 tons of ammonium nitrate explodes in Beirut, Lebanon.

Deaths

• 1875 – Hans Christian Andersen, Danish novelist, short story writer, and poet (b. 1805)
• 1962 – Marilyn Monroe, American model and actress (b. 1926)
• 1996 – Geoff Hamilton, English gardener, author, and television host (b. 1936)
• 1997 – Jeanne Calment, French super-centenarian; holds records for the world’s substantiated longest-lived person (b. 1875)
• 1999 – Victor Mature, American actor (b. 1913)

Death by Food by Neil G

I know when putting together my annual list of the damned, I usually hit up Dr. Google with “Celebrity ill health” or some such search term.

Predictably, most celebrities can afford the top medical interventions on offer, so my list often gets repeated year after year until the stubborn bastards finally succumb.

The blood of so many unicorns gone to waste.

However, this coming Christmas as I disregard buying presents for loved ones, and instead cram in my usual 25 minutes of research into noted humans, who I hope will die and furnish me with my maiden win in this despicable competition. Perhaps it would be prudent to pick those who we know like to eat things they probably shouldn’t…

10^th of July 1850, one Millard Fillmore was inaugurated as the 13^th President of the United States. Millard probably wasn’t expecting to become President if we’re honest, but for the rather odd death of his predecessor Zachary Taylor.

Taylor was particularly warm after participating in Independence Day activities at the Washington Monument, so he did what many of us do: He came home and raided the fridge (or icebox, in his case) for something cool to snack on. After enjoying some iced milk and cherries, Taylor fell sick almost immediately. He was dead five days later. Some historians believe the milk carried deadly bacteria; others suspected the massive quantities of acidic cherries mixed with the milk was too much for Taylor’s delicate stomach. Still others wonder if Taylor was poisoned. Probably should have played safe and gone a beer over the cherries. Let this be a lesson.

Here are nine other notables who have died due to eating oddities:

1) Steve Peregrin Took – Musician

Cherries, man, they’re such a menace. In 1980, Steve Peregrin Took, of the band Tyrannosaurus Rex, was pretty excited when the band’s manager managed to get the guys some back royalties they were owed. Took, who was no longer a member of the band at the time, celebrated by basically blowing the money on a huge bash that included magic mushrooms, morphine, and booze. After taking a magical mixture of all of those things, Took’s mouth went numb, making conditions just right for a cocktail cherry (and its pit) to slip into his throat unnoticed, and that was him done at the tender age of 31.

2) Adolf Frederick – King of Sweden

On February 12, 1771, the King of Sweden gorged himself on a feast that could have fed a whole crew of men: lobster, caviar, sauerkraut, herring, and champagne. To cap off his meal, King Adolf Frederick enjoyed 14 servings of semla served in hot milk. He died the same day, apparently of digestion problems. Semla, by the way, is a flour bun filled with almond paste and topped with whipped cream. It shouldn’t come as much of a shock to learn that Adolf is now known as “the king who ate himself to death.” A glutton for punishment?

3) Sherwood Anderson – Novelist

Novelist and short-story writer Sherwood Anderson was on a cruise with his wife in 1941 when he started to experience severe stomach cramps. He died a few days later at a hospital in Panama, where a doctor discovered that he had swallowed a whole toothpick that had likely speared an olive in a martini glass. The toothpick damaged Anderson’s internal organs, which then became infected.

4) George M. Prior – Navy Lieutenant

In other “don’t put things in your mouth that don’t belong there” news, we have the surprising demise of Navy Lieutenant George M. Prior. Prior had a few days’ leave from work and decided to spend every day playing golf at the Army-Navy Country Club in Arlington, Virginia. He felt nauseated by the end of the first day. By the end of the third day, he had a rash and a fever of 40°C and admitted himself to the hospital. Blisters the size of baseballs cropped up shortly thereafter, and a week and a half later, he was dead, with 80 percent of his skin burned and blistered. It was later determined that the golf tee he habitually stuck in his mouth after every hole had been covered in the fungicide the golf course used to keep their grounds beautiful. Prior’s allergic reaction to a chemical in the fungicide burned his skin from the inside out and caused the failure of several of his major organs.

5) Bando Mitsugoro VIII – Kabuki Actor

Remember that episode of The Simpsons (“One Fish, Two Fish, Blowfish, Blue Fish”) when Homer thinks he accidentally ate some poisonous fugu fish and would likely die by the time the sun rises? (Spoiler alert: He was fine.) In real life, certain parts of the fugu fish are extremely toxic, especially the liver. Ingesting too much of it will render the victim completely paralysed but totally conscious. Eventually, the paralysis even hits major organs. Basically, the victim ends up asphyxiating.

This is exactly what happened to Japan’s “Living National Treasure,” Bando Mitsugoro VIII, a Kabuki actor. In 1975, the actor insisted that he was strong enough to survive the toxin and ordered a large—and probably illegal—portion of fugu livers. Turns out Mitsugoro wasn’t strong enough to survive the toxin. Fugu you Mitsugoro, ya bloody drongo.

6) Basil Brown – Health Food Nut

As the saying goes, “all things in moderation.” That includes even the most nutritious food, believe it or not, which health nut Basil Brown learned the hard way in 1974. He was known to drink a 4.5 litres of carrot juice every day and would take excessive amounts of vitamin A pills to stay in tip-top shape. In the end, though, he wound up dying from “hypervitaminosis A,” a massive overdose of vitamin A that essentially shut down his liver. The doctor who performed the autopsy said the end result was indistinguishable from alcohol poisoning (that’s also my story and I’m sticking to it).

7) Edward Archbold – Wanted to Win a Python

Any way you can imagine it, death by roaches sounds pretty horrific. In the case of Edward Archbold, a Florida man, it wasn’t a weird Kafkaesque situation that did him in—he was actually ingesting the cockroaches. Along with about 30 other people, Archbold was consuming insects for the chance to win a free python in 2012. (“Eat like a python, win a python,” after all.) After eating a large number of roaches, two ounces of mealworms, and 35 horn worms, Archbold collapsed, his airway obstructed by roach body parts. He was pronounced dead at the hospital.

WTF?

8) Henry Hall – Lighthouse Keeper

Being a lighthouse keeper certainly has its hazards, but you probably never thought ingesting molten lead was one of them. Henry Hall probably didn’t, either. Hall was the lighthouse keeper for the Eddystone Lighthouse in Devon, England, when it caught on fire in 1755. As he looked up at the burning tower of the lighthouse, some melted lead from the reflector dripped onto his face and down his throat. The 94-year-old lasted 12 days before succumbing to his injuries; upon his death, his doctor removed a chunk of lead from his stomach that weighed nearly half a pound.

9) Vladimir Likhonos – Chemistry Student

Exploding bubble gum may sound like one of those tricks a clown may pull on you, but to chemistry student Vladimir Likhonos, it was no joke. Likhonos, who was studying at the Kyiv Polytechnic Institute in Ukraine, had developed a penchant for dunking his gum in citric acid before chewing to give it a sour pop. Sadly, a “pop” is what he got when he accidentally dipped his gum in an explosive substance he had been working with instead of the citric acid. The combination of his saliva with the powder was powerful enough to blow off most of his lower face. Paramedics were unable to save him.

Last Week’s Birthdays

Michael Berryman (74), Beyoncé (41), Iman Vellani (20), Charlie Sheen (57), Pauline Collins (82), Keanu Reeves (58), Salma Hayek (56), Keith Allen (69), Zendaya (26), Burn Gorman (48), Lily Tomlin (83), Gloria Estefan (65), Steve Pemberton (55), Barry Gibb (76), Richard Gere (73), Leem Lubany (25), Chris Tucker (51), Jessica Henwick (30), Cameron Diaz (50), Michael Chiklis (59), Warren Buffett (92), Carla Gugino (51), Emily Hampshire (41), Lenny Henry (64), Rebecca De Mornay (63), and Elliott Gould (84).

Alas, notable deaths have been a bit thin on the ground last week, maybe we’re saving them up for an extravaganza next week! 

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Stuart Anstis, 48, British guitarist (Cradle of Filth).  
• Vincent Gil, 83, Australian actor (Mad Max, Stone, Prisoner). 
• Jerry Allison, 82, American drummer (The Crickets) and songwriter (“That’ll Be the Day“, “Peggy Sue“). 
• Robert LuPone, 76, American actor (Jesus Christ Superstar, The Sopranos, A Chorus Line), pancreatic cancer. 
• Virginia Patton, 97, American actress (It’s a Wonderful Life, Black Eagle, The Lucky Stiff). 

In Other News

Brenda Fisher, famous for her record setting crossing of the English Channel, died on August 2nd at the age of 95. Fisher is famous for her victory in the 1951 Channel Race. She crossed Cap Gris-Nez, France to Dover, England in 12 hours and 42 minutes, taking 32 seconds off the existing world record. In 1954, Fisher became only the second woman in history to complete two swims of the Channel. In 1956, Fisher continued her marathon swimming career by earning the top women’s spot in that year’s 29 mile River Nile Race. Four months later she completed a solo 32 mile swim of Lake Ontario with a time of 18 hours and 51 minutes, breaking the existing record by more than 2 hours. Fisher’s feats made her both a local and international celebrity. She made an appearance on the Ed Sullivan show and later received the British Medal of Freedom in the Queen’s New Year Honours. Locally, she swam with the Grimsby’s Mermaid club where she trained under Herbert McNally. She was introduced to open water racing through her older siblings, who both completed the River Humber swim. Her 1951 Channel swim was done in memory of her brother Buster, who was a pilot in World War II. The Channel Swimming Association has described Fisher as “without a doubt one of the true open-water pioneer swimmers of the 20th century”. After retirement, Fisher remained heavily involved in the sport as she became a local swim instructor at her home club in Grimsby, England.     

A Scottish mountain bike champion has died aged just 37 –two days after winning a major championship. Rab Wardell won the men’s title at the Scottish MTB XC Championships at the weekend. Mr Wardell, who was the partner of Olympic gold medal-winning cyclist Katie Archibald, had been riding bikes from a young age but did not take up cycling or mountain biking as a sport until he was 15. His win at Kirroughtree Forest near Newton Stewart, Wigtownshire, on Sunday was described as a ‘show of incredible resilience’ by British Cycling after Mr Wardell managed to catch the early race leaders to take the win. During the race he recovered from three punctures to take the gold medal. Last night the Scottish Cross Country Association (SXC), which runs the mountain bike race series, said it was ‘devastated’ to announce that Mr Wardell had died overnight in his sleep. A statement from SXC said: ‘We are devastated to relay to you the tragic news that our friend, our Champion Rab Wardell, has died overnight. He will be truly missed by our community and his determination, talent and friendship will live on in all our hearts and memories. RIP Rab. Our Champion, Our Inspiration, Our Friend.’ In 2020 Mr Wardell, who lived in Glasgow, set the fastest known time for mountain biking the West Highland Way, completing it in nine hours, 14 minutes and 32 seconds. He represented Scotland in the Commonwealth Games and competed in the UCI Mountain Bike World Cup series. On Monday night he appeared on BBC Scotland show The Nine to talk about his championship win.  

Scientists have reported finding the worlds unluckiest man, being the first known case of a person testing positive for monkeypox, Covid-19 and HIV at the same time. The patient, a 36-year-old Italian male, developed a series of symptoms – including fatigue, fever, and a sore throat – nine days after returning from a trip to Spain, where he engaged in unprotected bum sex. He first tested positive for Covid on 2nd July, according to a case study report published in the Journal of Infection. The following day small, painful vesicles surrounded a rash appeared on the man’s torso, lower limbs, face and glutes. By 5th July, the vesicles had further spread and evolved into pustules, small bumps on the skin, at which point the man took himself to a hospital in Palermo. There, he was tested for monkeypox and subsequently returned a positive result. The patient was also screened for multiple STIs. He tested positive for HIV-1, and the researchers said that “given his preserved CD4 count, we could assume that the infection was relatively recent.” The patient had taken an HIV test in September of last year and returned a negative result. After recovering from Covid-19 and monkeypox, the patient was discharged from hospital on 11th July to home isolation. By this stage, his skin lesions had healed, after crusting over, leaving small scars. “This case highlights how monkeypox and Covid-19 symptoms may overlap, and corroborates how in case of co-infection, anamnestic collection and sexual habits are crucial to perform the correct diagnosis,” the researchers said in their case report. “To note, the monkeypox oropharyngeal swab was still positive after 20 days, suggesting that these individuals may still be contagious for several days after clinical remission,” the report said. “Consequently, physicians should encourage appropriate precautions.” 

On This Day

• 1859 – The Carrington event is the strongest geomagnetic storm on record to strike the Earth. Electrical telegraph service is widely disrupted.
• 1898 – Caleb Bradham‘s beverage “Brad’s Drink” is renamed “Pepsi-Cola”.
• 1957 – U.S. Senator Strom Thurmond begins a filibuster to prevent the United States Senate from voting on the Civil Rights Act of 1957; he stopped speaking 24 hours and 18 minutes later, the longest filibuster ever conducted by a single Senator.
• 1963 – March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom: Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. gives his I Have a Dream speech.
• 1988 – Ramstein air show disaster: Three aircraft of the Frecce Tricolori demonstration team collide and the wreckage falls into the crowd. Seventy-five are killed and 346 seriously injured.

Deaths

• 1978 – Robert Shaw, English actor (b. 1927)
• 1987 – John Huston, Irish actor, director, and screenwriter (b. 1906)
• 2020 – Chadwick Boseman, American actor and playwright (b. 1976)

True Love, Even After Death

Carl Tanzler was a German-born radiology technologist at the Marine-Hospital Service in Key West, Florida. He developed an obsession for a young Cuban-American tuberculosis patient, Elena “Helen” Milagro de Hoyos, that carried on well after her death. In 1933, almost two years after her death, Tanzler removed Hoyos’ body from its tomb, and lived with the corpse at his home for seven years until its discovery by Hoyos’ relatives and authorities in 1940. 

Tanzler grew up in Imperial Germany and later while traveling briefly in Genoa, Italy, Tanzler claimed to have been visited by visions of a dead, purported ancestor, Countess Anna Constantia von Cosel, who revealed the face of his true love, an exotic dark-haired woman, to him. 

However, he ignored this vision and around 1920 Tanzler married Doris Schäfer. Together they had two children: Ayesha, and Clarista. By 1926 they had emigrated to Florida. 

On April 22nd, 1930, while working at the Marine Hospital in Key West, Tanzler met Maria Elena “Helen” Milagro de Hoyos, a local Cuban-American woman who had been brought to the hospital by her mother for an examination. Tanzler immediately recognised her as the beautiful dark-haired woman that had been revealed to him in his earlier “visions.” By all accounts, Hoyos was viewed as a local beauty in Key West.

Elena was eventually diagnosed with tuberculosis, a typically fatal disease at the time, that eventually claimed the lives of almost all of her immediate family. Tanzler, with his self-professed medical knowledge, attempted to treat and cure Elena with a variety of medicines, as well as X-ray and electrical equipment, that were brought to the Hoyos’ home. Tanzler showered Elena with gifts of jewellery and clothing, and allegedly professed his love to her, but no evidence has surfaced to show that any of his affection was reciprocated by Elena. 

Despite Tanzler’s best efforts, Elena died of tuberculosis at her parents’ home in Key West on October 25th 1931. Tanzler paid for her funeral, and with the permission of her family, he then commissioned the construction of an above ground mausoleum in the Key West Cemetery, which he visited almost every night. 

One evening in April 1933, Tanzler crept through the cemetery where Elena was buried and removed her body from the mausoleum, carting it through the cemetery after dark on a toy wagon, and transporting it to his home. He reportedly said that Elena’s spirit would come to him when he would sit by her grave and serenade her corpse with a favourite Spanish song. He also said that she would often tell him to take her from the grave.

Tanzler attached the corpse’s bones together with piano wire and fitted the face with glass eyes. As the skin of the corpse decomposed, Tanzler replaced it with silk cloth soaked in wax and plaster of paris. As the hair fell out of Elena’s decomposing scalp, Tanzler fashioned a wig from her hair, which he had previously obtained from her mother. Tanzler filled the corpse’s abdominal and chest cavity with rags to keep the original form, dressed Elena’s remains in stockings, jewellery, and gloves, and kept the body in his bed. Tanzler also used copious amounts of perfume, disinfectants, and preserving agents to mask the odour and forestall the effects of the corpse’s decomposition.

By October 1940, Elena’s sister Florinda heard rumours of Tanzler sleeping with the disinterred body of her sister and confronted Tanzler at his home, where Elena’s body was eventually discovered (he was also caught dancing with her corpse in front of an open window). Florinda notified the authorities, and Tanzler was arrested and detained. Tanzler was psychiatrically examined and found mentally competent to stand trial on the charge of “wantonly and maliciously destroying a grave and removing a body without authorisation.” After a preliminary hearing on October 9th 1940 at the Monroe County Courthouse in Key West, Tanzler was held to answer on the charge, but the case was eventually dropped, and he was released, as the statute of limitations for the crime had expired.

Shortly after the corpse’s discovery by authorities, Elena’s body was examined by physicians and pathologists, and put on public display at the Dean-Lopez Funeral Home, where it was viewed by as many as 6,800 people! Elena’s body was eventually returned to the Key West Cemetery where the remains were buried in an unmarked grave, in a secret location, to prevent further tampering.

The facts underlying the case and the preliminary hearing drew much interest from the media at the time, and created a sensation among the public, both regionally and nationwide. The public mood was generally sympathetic to Tanzler, whom many viewed as an eccentric “romantic”.

Though not reported contemporaneously, research has revealed evidence of Tanzler’s necrophilia with Elena’s corpse. Two physicians who attended the 1940 autopsy of Elena’s remains recalled in 1972 that a vaginal tube had been inserted in the vaginal area of the corpse that allowed for intercourse. Others contend that since no evidence of necrophilia was presented at the 1940 preliminary hearing, and because the physicians’ “proof” surfaced in 1972, over 30 years after the case had been dismissed, the necrophilia allegation is questionable. While no existing contemporary photographs of the autopsy or photographs taken at the public display show a tube. 

In 1944, Tanzler moved to Pasco County, Florida, close to Zephyrhills, where he wrote an autobiography that appeared in the pulp publication, Fantastic Adventures, in 1947. His home was near his wife Doris, who apparently helped to support Tanzler in his later years. 

Separated from his obsession, Tanzler used a death mask to create a life-sized effigy of Elena, and lived with it until his death at age 75 in 1952. His body was discovered on the floor of his home three weeks after his death.

It has been recounted that Tanzler was found in the arms of Elena’s effigy upon discovery of his corpse, but his obituary reported that he died on the floor behind one of his organs. The obituary recounted: “a metal cylinder on a shelf above a table in it wrapped in silken cloth and a robe was a waxen image”.

It has been written that Tanzler had the bodies switched (or that Elena’s remains were secretly returned to him), and that he died with the real body of Elena.

Last Week’s Birthdays

Luis Guzmán (66), Armie Hammer (36), Jack Black (53), Brian Thompson (63), Shania Twain (57), Jason Priestley (53), Billy Boyd (54), Barbara Bach (76), David Soul (79), Peter Stormare (69), Aaron Paul (43), Paul Reubens (70), Peter Mensah (63), Reece Shearsmith (53), Chris Pine (42), Melissa McCarthy (52), Macaulay Culkin (42), Alexander Skarsgård (46), Tim Burton (64), Blake Lively (35), Rachel Bilson (41), Tom Skerritt (89), Gene Simmons (73), Billy Ray Cyrus (61), Claudia Schiffer (52), Stephen Fry (65), Jared Harris (61), Rupert Grint (34), Steve Guttenberg (64), Park Chan-wook (59), Ray Park (48), Charley Boorman (56), Richard Armitage (51), Kristen Wiig (49), Ty Burrell (55), Mark Williams (63), Dua Lipa (27), and for the love of god, why wont James Corden (44) die!?!

Sadly no points this week, however the newsletter has grown into a bit of a monster, so best get on with it. 

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Darius Campbell Danesh, 41, Scottish singer-songwriter (“Colourblind“, “Rushes“, “Incredible (What I Meant to Say)“)
• Steve Grimmett, 62, English heavy metal singer (Grim Reaper, Onslaught, Lionsheart). 
• Nicholas Evans, 72, English writer (The Horse Whisperer), heart attack. 
• Lenny Johnrose, 52, English footballer (Bury, Blackburn Rovers, Burnley), complications from motor neurone disease. 
• Duggie Brown, 82, English comedian and actor (Coronation Street, The Final Cut, Kes).
• Joseph Delaney, 77, British author (Spook’s).  
• Bruce Montague, 83, English actor (Butterflies, The Link Men, Hollyoaks). 
• Herbert Mullin, 75, American serial killer.  
• Josephine Tewson, 91, British actress (Keeping Up Appearances, Last of the Summer Wine).  
• Ioane King, 49, New Zealand actor (Spartacus), cancer. 
• Leon Vitali, 74, English actor (Barry Lyndon, Eyes Wide Shut, Romeo & Juliet).

In Other News

Buffy the Vampire Slayer actor Nicholas Brendon is in hospital after a “cardiac incident”. The star, 51, who played Xander in the hit Nineties series, was taken to A&E for treatment and is now resting. The news was shared in a statement on his Instagram. It was posted alongside photos of Brendon on a stretcher, in a wheelchair and on a hospital bed. The statement reads: “Nicky sends his love and wanted me to apologise that he hasn’t been going live as much lately and to give everyone an update. “Nicky is doing fine now but he had to be rushed to emergency about two weeks ago because of a cardiac incident (tachycardia/arrhythmia).” It continues: “Some of you might remember he had a similar incident after his second spinal surgery last year (for Cauda Equina) but this time he is trying to get a little more rest and has been concentrating on medical appointments.” In October last year, Brendon’s manager said that the actor was withdrawing from all promotion for his film Wanton Want after suffering paralysis in his legs and genitals. The symptoms are understood to be caused by Cauda equina syndrome, a rare condition in which the end of the spinal cord is compressed, causing severe swelling and cutting off movement and sensation of the genitals, bladder and bowel. In August that year, Brendon was arrested for using a false identity to try to purchase drugs. He was officially charged with the crime of “prescription fraud of a controlled substance and for refusing to identify himself when stopped for an infraction” in Indiana. In recent years, the actor has had numerous legal issues including a 2017 case for domestic violence. He has also previously been in rehab for substance abuse, depression and alcoholism.  

A TikTok user who claims to be a ‘time traveller’ from the year 2082 has claimed they know when the Queen will die and have warned that Big Ben will collapse. The user who posts as @timetraveller_2082 warned that the monarch will die later this year, while giving a list of other alleged events to come over the next 23 years. In the video, they wrote: “I am a real time traveller. In 2023, Big Ben collapses due to an unexpected earthquake. In 2030 GTA 7 is released. “Queen Elizabeth went in 2022, October 4th. In 2046, Niagara Falls has a huge blockage and water levels start to rise. Be warned.” TikTok users took to the comments in shock over the warning as one user wrote: “WhT?!” However, the user doubled down on their predictions as they replied: “You can trust me.” Other people took to the comments to try to gather more information from them about the future. One user asked: “Does Tottenham win trophy?” The alleged ‘time traveller’ shocked users with the answer, writing: “In 4 years yes! Then get bankrupt in 2030.” The news comes after a woman accurately predicted 10 major events of 2022, and was compared to famed mystic Baba Vanga who believes the Queen will die this year. In January, Hannah Carroll, 19, wrote down 28 predictions for 2022 and has already seen eight major events come true. Hannah has 18 more predictions yet to come true including the death of the Queen. She said: “I still think all of my predictions will come true, but maybe I was off a bit on the timing and some will happen in the next few years rather than this year.” She is already banned from playing The Dead Pool.  

An Alabama death row inmate was subjected to three hours of pain during his execution, the longest recorded lethal injection process in US history, according to a report by a human rights organisation. Joe Nathan James Jr., 50, was convicted and sentenced to death for the 1994 fatal shooting of his girlfriend, Faith Hall, 26, in Birmingham. Examination by Reprieve US estimates that officials at the Atmore, Alabama, correctional facility took between three and three and half hours to carry out James’ lethal injection. They set James’ execution for 6pm on July 28th, though media were barred from entering until 8:57pm Then, James was pronounced dead at 9:27pm. Evaluation of the autopsy reveals that officials unsuccessfully tried for more than three hours to insert an IV line. The execution team then attempted a cut-down procedure, according to Reprieve US, which would have caused James to struggle and leave him with injuries on his hands and wrists. ‘Subjecting a prisoner to three hours of pain and suffering is the definition of cruel and unusual punishment,’ said Maya Foa, director of Reprieve US. ‘States cannot continue to pretend that the abhorrent practice of lethal injection is in any way humane.’ Alabama state officials did not answer questions in reference to the execution’s three-hour delay and said ‘there was nothing out of the ordinary. I can’t over emphasise this process,’ said John Hamm, Alabama Department of Corrections commissioner, in a statement. ‘We’re carrying out the ultimate punishment … and we have protocols and we are very deliberate in our process and making sure everything goes according to plan. So, if that takes a few minutes or a few hours, that’s what we do.’ Hamm did not clarify what part of the procedure resulted in the delay and added that they ‘took their deliberate time, if the veins are such that intravenous access cannot be provided, the team will perform a central line procedure. Fortunately, this was not necessary and with adequate time, intravenous access was established.’ James’ eyes were closed for the entirety of the procedure and he did not respond to the warden when asked if he had any last words. Witnesses saw his arm move with some slight movement at 9.05pm followed by some indications of breathing one minute later. His breathing lasted until 9.10pm when a correctional officer performed a consciousness check, to which James only responded to an arm pinch by moving his head side-to-side. James’ breathing appeared to stop at 9.12pm, with curtains to the room being closed to witnesses at 9.18pm. His time of death was recorded nine minutes later at 9.27 pm. ‘Something terrible had been done to James while he was strapped to a gurney behind closed doors without so much as a lawyer present to protest his treatment or an advocate to observe it, yet the state insisted that nothing unusual had taken place.’ The report by Reprieve US claim that, because of the long process to establish an IV line, the execution team would have sedated James before media arrived. This would cause James to be visibly unconscious at 9pm. ‘First, it was a torturous procedure behind closed doors, then a theatrical performance for witnesses,’ Foa said.    

EastEnders actor Anna Karen is said to have left the majority of her fortune to one of her co-stars. The actor, who also appeared in sitcom On the Buses, died in a house fire in February 2022, aged 85. It’s now been reported by the Flying Monkeys that Karen left 65 per cent of her estate to Sophie Lawrence, who played Diane Butcher in the BBC soap. Lawrence first appeared in the soap from 1988 to 1991, but has returned numerous times over the years. Her most recent appearance was in 2012. Karen played Aunt Sal in the series. Karen and Lawrence remained friends, with the pair also starring together in comedy show Bazaar & Rummage, which is based on the Sue Townsend book. Elsewhere, the documents reveal Karen split the remainder of her fortune to her step-daughter, Gloria Gill, two friends and the Actors’ Benevolent Fund. The actor married Terry Duggan in 1967 and helped bring up his daughter, Gloria, from a previous relationship. An EastEnders spokesperson said of her death in February: “We are deeply saddened to hear that Anna Karen has passed away. Anna created a sharp, quick-witted and extremely popular character in Aunt Sal that the audience will never forget, just as those who worked with her at EastEnders will never forget her warmth, kindness, fun and good humour. Our love and thoughts are with Anna’s family and friends.” 

Derek Draper’s long struggle with Covid-19 has taken another turn for the worse after he was rushed back to hospital for a “serious” medical procedure on Friday. Draper, 55, who is married to Good Morning Britain star Kate Garraway, first fell seriously ill in March 2020 after contracting the virus. Despite now being Covid- free, he continues to suffer from long-lasting damage to his organs and requires daily care. According to the Flying Monkeys, yesterday’s knock-back saw Garraway stay by her husband’s bedside following the operation on his kidneys. Last night, a source told us: “This is another hammer blow for poor Derek. He is giving the fight against covid his absolute all, but his kidneys have suffered some pretty serious damage. Doctors explained there was no alternative but to operate. Of course Kate and the family are worried but she’s been reassured the procedure itself is routine. Everyone has everything crossed, and Kate is being her usual stoical self and keeping everything running, business as usual, on the home front.” Draper, a formal political advisor and psychotherapist, was hospitalised for a year with the virus, making him the longest serving hospital in-patient with Covid-19. In July, Garraway was forced to temporarily step back from her GMB and Smooth FM roles to care for her husband after Draper suffered a “frightening turn for the worse.” She has since returned to both jobs.

On This Day

• 1770 – James Cook formally claims eastern Australia for Great Britain, naming it New South Wales.
• 1945 – Physicist Harry Daghlian is fatally irradiated in a criticality accident during an experiment with the Demon core at Los Alamos National Laboratory.
• 1957 – The Soviet Union successfully conducts a long-range test flight of the R-7 Semyorka, the first intercontinental ballistic missile.
• 1986 – Carbon dioxide gas erupts from volcanic Lake Nyos in Cameroon, killing up to 1,800 people within a 20 Km range.

Deaths

• 1614 – Elizabeth Báthory, Hungarian countess and purported serial killer (b. 1560)
• 1940 – Leon Trotsky, Russian theorist and politician, founded the Red Army (b. 1879)
• 2013 – Sid Bernstein, American record producer (b. 1918)

Stuntman David Lea dies from lung cancer aged 67

Friends and family have revealed how the late Hollywood stuntman David Lea, friends with Sylvester Stallone and Jackie Chan, took a knife wound down to the bone on camera but didn’t flinch until the scene was over. Lea died from lung cancer on August 6th at the age of 67. He doubled for Michael Keaton in Batman movies, braved brutal fight scenes with Sylvester Stallone in Tango & Cash, and worked with a host of other A-listers.

Stallone is said to be distraught over the stuntman’s death and sent the family condolences, as did John Wick movie director Chad Stahelski, Day Shift director JJ Perry, Mortal Kombat actor Lewis Tan and Bruce Lee’s protégé Dan Insanto.

In an exclusive interview with the Flying Monkeys, his daughter, friends and colleagues revealed how British-born Lea was tough as nails and totally committed to his work, even encouraging Stallone to smash his head repeatedly into a metal table to get the perfect shot.

His daredevil stunts – including for the actual 2003 movie Daredevil – ranged from being hit and driven over by cars, diving from moving vehicles, being thrown ten feet across a room, smashing through thick wooden doors, to breaking two bricks over his hand. 

He performed stunts in Will Smith’s 1999 movie Wild Wild West, 1997 movies Batman & Robin and Con Air, and most recently was a double for Mickey Rourke in the 2022 movie The Commando. 

Friends say that  Lea was still taking heavy hits to get great footage even late into his 60s. ‘He seemed to become really good friends with any celeb he worked with. He might see them as a role model, but he wasn’t star struck,’ Lea’s daughter Angel Lea-Seagreen told the Flying Monkeys. He was a very generous, time-giving person who always wanted to help people. I think he’s gained a lot of love and respect for that.’

Lea’s mentee, trainee stuntwoman Nora Perez, revealed how Lea would brush off severe injuries to get the perfect take on set. While working as a stunt double for Michael Keaton in the 1989 Batman movie, Perez said Lea was cut for real in a staged knife fight. ‘He said ”I felt the knife hitting my bone but I just pushed through it, I just kept going through the scene until they yelled cut.” He would say ”until they say cut, I don’t break character”,’ Perez said.

‘He was always happy and joking around. There was not a day where he wasn’t joking around. But when he came to work, he was all about work. ‘He was very graceful, he would think of others before himself. He was a great mentor for me as far as being a better person.’ 

Lea’s lifelong friend and fellow stunt coordinator Phil Tan, who got him the Batman job as his first big Hollywood break, said Lea forged a close bond with Stallone and would go the extra mile in fight scenes with the Rocky star.

‘Sly loves fighting Dave. He was very hurt when we had to tell him Dave passed away,’ Tan said. Lea choreographed a brutal brawl with Stallone in 1989 movie Tango & Cash – and made it shockingly real. ‘Dave told Sly, ”I want to make this look good. So when you smash my head into the table, I want you to do it for real. Beat the shit out of me, and it’s going to look fucking real and you’re going to look great”,’ Tan said. ‘He slammed his head over and over, like five or six times. And that was just one take. He did a bunch of takes.’ 

Tan, who helped produce Mickey Rourke movie The Commando released in January this year, said Lea was still taking heavy hits to get great footage even late into his 60s. 

‘Dave had to get kicked through a door. Because of the budget  we couldn’t get a balsa wood door where you can just kick it and he’ll go straight through. So we got a real door. ‘I said, “it’s only going to be one take and it is going to hurt like a mofo. Are you okay with that?” He said “Bring it Phil. Let’s go.” So he got kicked by Michael Jai White, who’s huge, 240 pounds of muscle. He kicked him straight through the freaking door. It was amazing. But because it was a real door, it cut him. He was bleeding, but he said ‘I’m good, do you want to do another one?’ He never complained. He is one of the toughest guys I know. The toughest guy on the street, the toughest guy on the set.’ 

Lea was trained in six types of Kung Fu, Shotokan karate, the Philippines martial art Escrima and kickboxing. He worked with stars including Stallone, Smith, Ashley Judd, Ben Affleck, Colin Farrell, Tom Cruise, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Ewan McGregor, Scarlett Johansson, Sandra Bullock, Michelle Pfeiffer, Famke Janssen, Dennis Quaid and David Boreanaz. 

Angel, an elementary school assistant in Essex, England, said Lea was working until just a few weeks ago, and that his lung cancer moved swiftly. ‘My head has been in such a spin the last couple of weeks,’ she said. ‘His decline was quite rapid. It was fast, and it was aggressive. ‘He was working until just a couple of months ago. He was doing what he loved, so he kept going as long as his legs would hold him.’ She said her fondest memories were messing around on London’s Oxford Street and Chinatown, taking pictures and making comedic videos with her father. 

‘He didn’t come from a privileged background in any way,’ she said. ‘He worked damn hard. And he appreciated everybody in his life.’

His family held a memorial for Lea at a Los Angeles church on Monday.

Last Week’s Birthdays

RJ Mitte (30), Laura Haddock (37), Alicia Witt (47), Kim Cattrall (66), Hayden Panettiere (33), Carrie-Anne Moss (55), Paul Chowdhry (48), Andrew Garfield (39), Amy Adams (48), Ke Huy Quan (51), Ben Barnes (41), James Marsters (60), John Noble (74), Demi Lovato (30), Misha Collins (48), Joan Allen (66), Ray Wise (75), Sylvester McCoy (79), David Walliams (51), Diana Muldaur (84), Matthew Perry (53), Jonathan Frakes (70), Jim Carter (74), Jill St. John (82), Ian McElhinney (74), Simon Bird (38), Edward Norton (53), Robert Redford (86), Christian Slater (53), Madeleine Stowe (64), Roman Polanski (89), Denis Leary (65), Robert De Niro (79), Sean Penn (62), Belinda Carlisle (64), Taika Waititi (47), Steve Carell (60), James Cameron (68), Julie Newmar (89), Madonna (64), Ben Affleck (50), Jennifer Lawrence (32), Natasha Henstridge (48), Debra Messing (54), David Zayas (60), Joe Jonas (33), Tony Robinson (76), and Jim Dale (87).