Afternoon all, a quick update on the happenings of last week, alas not a lot happened and without the death of Val Doonican, we would be in a terrible state. I’ll not waffle on, let’s get to the non-existent news!

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Chris Squire, 67, English bass guitarist (Yes), acute erythroid leukemia.
• Matti Makkonen, 63, Finnish telecommunications engineer, inventor of the SMS.
• Kauto Star, 15, French-born British-trained racehorse, dual winner of the Cheltenham Gold Cup, euthanized.
• Bruce Rowland, 74, British rock drummer (Fairport Convention).
• Edward Burnham, 98, English actor (To Sir, with Love, 10 Rillington Place, Doctor Who).
• Leonard Starr, 89, American cartoonist (ThunderCats).
• Val Doonican, 88, Irish singer and television presenter.

In Other News

Former children’s television presenter John Noakes has been found after disappearing during a walk on the island of Mallorca early on Tuesday morning in 35C heat. The former Blue Peter presenter, who has Alzheimer’s disease, was taken to hospital after he was found in a field. When located, the 81 year old was found to have a weak heartbeat and was suffering from dehydration, but is expected to recover. Noakes, who joined Blue Peter in 1965, was known for both his adventurous physical exploits, including what was at the time the longest free-fall parachute jump by a British civilian, and his association with one of the show’s resident dogs, border collie Shep, which died in 1987.

Sonia Manzano, who has played Maria on the US children’s programme Sesame Street for more than four decades, is retiring. Manzano, 65, joined the show in  1971 and became a series regular in 1974, giving helpful advice to characters like Big Bird and Elmo. She was also a writer on the show, winning 15 Emmy Awards for her work. We all know what happens when active people retire don’t we Poolers…

Joni Mitchell did have an aneurysm in March but is able to speak, a friend who acts as her conservator has said. Leslie Morris’s update on the Canadian singer’s condition follows an interview with US musician David Crosby, in which he said she was still unable to speak. “The truth is that Joni is speaking, and she’s speaking well,” said Morris on Mitchell’s official website. “She is resting comfortably in her own home and she’s getting better each day. A full recovery is expected.” Mitchell, 71, was found unconscious in her Los Angeles home on 31 March and taken to hospital.

On This Day

• 1687 – Isaac Newton publishes Philosophiæ Naturalis Principia Mathematica.
• 1841 – Thomas Cook organises the first package excursion, from Leicester to Loughborough.
• 1937 – Spam, the luncheon meat, is introduced into the market by the Hormel Foods Corporation.
• 1946 – The bikini goes on sale after debuting during an outdoor fashion show at the Molitor Pool in Paris, France.
• 1948 – National Health Service Acts creates the national public health systems in the United Kingdom.
• 1954 – The BBC broadcasts its first television news bulletin.
• 1975 – Arthur Ashe becomes the first black man to win the Wimbledon singles title.
• 1996 – Dolly the sheep becomes the first mammal cloned from an adult cell.

Deaths

For the first time ever, nobody of any importance, or I’d heard of, died on this day in the past!!!

Last Week’s Birthdays

Tom Cruise (53), Lindsey Lohan (29), John Cusack (49), Pamela Anderson (48), Mike Tyson (49), Debbie Harry (70), Dan Aykroyd (63), Mel Brooks (89), Kathy Bates (67), Katherine Jenkins (35), Gary Busey (71), Michael Phelps (30), Liv Tyler (38), Larry David (68), Ashley Tisdale (30), Cheryl Cole (32), Missy Elliott (44), Carl Lewis (54), Jerry Hall (59), Montel Williams (59) and Yardley Smith (51).

Next Week peeps!

Welcome all,  we have points to distribute!!  Well done to Julie and Liz for correctly guessing that Patrick Mcnee would die this year, 57 points each! We almost had more to hand out, but it was Dick Van Patten who died, not Dick Van Dyke! I bet you all nearly shat yourselves when you saw that! So, a slight change in the league table, with six months to go.

Now we’re at the halfway point, some of us are doing quite well, some of us not so well. I personally thought my list was the bomb this year, but seeing I’m yet to score, I’m slightly mistaken. Oh well, you never know what will happen, one minute you’re enjoying a Tunisian holiday… Too soon?

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Earl Norem, 91, American comic book artist (Silver Surfer, He-Man and the Masters of the Universe).
• Nazar Singh, 111, Indian-born British longevity claimant, unverified oldest man in Europe.
• Tony Longo, 53, American character actor (Mulholland Drive, Angels in the Outfield, Eraser).
• Carl Thompson, 33, British record holder, nation’s heaviest man.
• Don Featherstone, 79, American artist and inventor of the plastic pink flamingo, Lewy body dementia.
• James Horner, 61, American composer (Titanic, Field of Dreams, Apollo 13), Oscar winner (1998), plane crash.
• Magali Noël, 83, French actress (Amarcord, La Dolce Vita) and singer.
• Dick Van Patten, 86, American actor (Eight Is Enough, Spaceballs, Robin Hood: Men in Tights), complications from diabetes.
• Sir Chris Woodhead, 68, British educationalist, Chief Inspector for Ofsted (1994–2000), motor neurone disease.
• Patrick Macnee, 93, English-American actor (The Avengers, This Is Spinal Tap, A View to a Kill).

In Other News 

The UK’s heaviest man has been found dead in his Dover flat. Carl Thompson, who weighed 65 stone, had been housebound for more than a year. The fire brigade, police and ambulance staff took several hours to remove the 33 year old from his home. His body was removed using a small crane. Consuming 10,000 calories every day – four times the usual daily amount for a man – he reportedly spent about £200 a week on takeaways and online food shopping. Unable to walk or dress himself, Thompson was bathed and cooked for by a team of NHS carers. The owner of Thompson’s favourite takeaway – who would deliver food to his bedside using a key to his flat – spoke of sending him what may have been his final food order. Merdad Mohebbi, owner of nearby Q Pizza, told the Sun: “I can’t believe it. He had cut right down on what he was eating. He was only ordering one or two things a day. When I took the order he seemed happy enough. He was talking about how he was going to the hospital and they were going to do tests for him. He was full of life.”

The Boston bomber Dzhokhar Tsarnaev has apologised to his victims as he returned to court to be formally sentenced to death. “I am sorry for the lives I have taken, for the suffering that I have caused you,” he told the injured and bereaved. Tsarnaev and his brother killed three and injured 264 when they bombed the finish line of the marathon in 2013. What we are now concerned with is, how long will he be on Death Row? Are you confident that swift justice will be upheld? At 21 years old there’s a potential points windfall for anyone who lists him, but as with all Death Row inmates, appeals upon appeals tend to drag on over years.

Bobbi Kristina Brown’s condition has worsened and her family say she is now in a hospice to die. A statement released on behalf of the Houston family said that “despite the great medical care at numerous facilities, Bobbi Kristina Brown’s condition has continued to deteriorate, as of today, she has been moved into hospice care.” The news comes as a court case against Brown’s boyfriend, Nick Gordon is filed. The legal case accuses Gordon of only marrying Brown after she inherited a substantial amount of money and alleges that Gordon’s behaviour “caused, among other things, substantial bodily harm to Brown.” It also claimed that since Brown’s hospitalisation in January, Gordon has accessed her accounts and stole more than $11,000 (£7,000). Nice chap…

And finally, TV presenter Michelle Watt has been  found dead in her home at the age of 38, sadly she wasn’t famous enough to feature on the main list as she does not have a Wiki entry under her own name. Police discovered her body on Wednesday evening after being called to an address in Airth, near Falkirk. The former 60 Minute Makeover host had also worked on programmes including the Scottish dating show Club Cupid and STV’s The Hour. Apparently there are no suspicious circumstances to report, other than she died.

On This Day

• 1838 – Coronation of Victoria of the United Kingdom.
• 1880 – The Australian bushranger Ned Kelly is captured at Glenrowan.
• 1914 – Franz Ferdinand, Archduke of Austria and his wife Sophie are assassinated in Sarajevo by Bosnia Serb nationalist Gavrilo Princip, the casus belli of World War I.
• 1919 – The Treaty of Versailles is signed in Paris, bringing fighting to an end in between Germany and the Allies of World War I.
• 1948 – Boxer Dick Turpin beats Vince Hawkins at Villa Park in Birmingham to become the first black British boxing champion in the modern era.
• 1964 – Malcolm X forms the Organization of Afro-American Unity.
• 1969 – Stonewall Riots begin in New York City, marking the start of the Gay Rights Movement.
• 1997 – Holyfield–Tyson II: Mike Tyson is disqualified in the 3rd round for biting a piece off Evander Holyfield‘s ear.

Deaths

• 1914 – Sophie, Duchess of Hohenberg (b. 1868)
• 1914 – Archduke Franz Ferdinand of Austria (b. 1863)
• 1976 – Stanley Baker, Welsh actor and producer (b. 1927)
• 2001 – Joan Sims, English actress (b. 1930)

Last Week’s Birthdays

Bernie Kopell (82), Lana Del Rey (30), Kris Kristofferson (79), Meryl Streep (66), Cyndi Lauper (62), Randy Couture (52), Francis McDormand (58), Selma Blair (43), KT Tunstall (40), Melissa Rauch (35), Zinedine Zidane (43), Jeff Beck (71), Mick Fleetwood (68), Lionel Messi (28), Carly Simon (70), Ricky Gervais (54), George Michael (52), Chris Isaak (59), Jason Schwartzman (35), JJ Abrams (49) and Tobey Maguire (40).

Next Week peeps!

Afternoon my morbid minions, we have points to disburse! Well done Dave and Paul C. for correctly guessing that Jeralean Talley, the worlds oldest living person (now not so much), would kick the bucket this year. 34 points each. I know, not many points, but it’s still 34 more than most of us have.

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Rick Ducommun, 62, Canadian actor (The ‘Burbs, Scary Movie, Die Hard), complications from diabetes.
• Blaze Starr, 83, American stripper, burlesque comedienne and club owner, subject of Blaze.
• Ron Clarke, 78, Australian long distance runner, Olympic bronze medalist (1964), Mayor of the Gold Coast (2004–2012), kidney failure.
• Nelson Doubleday, Jr., 81, American publisher (Doubleday) and Major League Baseball team owner (New York Mets), pneumonia.
• Jeralean Talley, 116, American supercentenarian, world’s oldest living person.

In Other News

Veteran actor Sir John Hurt has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. The 75-year-old, who was Oscar-nominated for his role in 1980’s The Elephant Man, said he would continue working despite the diagnosis. “I am undergoing treatment and am more than optimistic about a satisfactory outcome, as indeed is the medical team,” he told the Press Association. “I am continuing to focus on my professional commitments and will shortly be recording Jeffrey Bernard Is Unwell (one of life’s small ironies!) for BBC Radio 4,” he said.

In the same vein, Tommy Chong, one half of the 1970s comedy duo Cheech and Chong, reveals he has rectal cancer. “I have good news and bad news. First the bad  news, the cancer came back and it is a real pain in the butt,” the 77-year-old comedian tweeted. “The good news is I now have to use more marijuana to treat the cancer.” Chong was diagnosed with prostate cancer three years ago, and cited marijuana as a key player in his recovery. It can’t have helped that much if it came back!

Leading on, we have reports of former dance-pop singer George Michael being in rehab over marijuana use. The 51-year-old has checked in to the Switzerland-based Kusnacht Practice to receive treatment for substance abuse, after having “admitted to have consumed up to 25 joints per day”. Once described as “the world’s most expensive rehab clinic”, the facility near to Zurich charges around €100,000 (£72,000) for treatment and has previously been used by other famous clients, including designer John Galliano. The clinic released a statement saying: “We can neither confirm nor deny that George Michael is a patient with us.” In March last year, Michael said he had not used cannabis for “well over a year-and-a-half”, so he must be making up for lost time…

Colin Montgomerie checked into hospital due to chest pains early on Sunday but was cleared in time to play his final round at the Senior Players Championship in Massachusetts. The Briton, considered one of the best players never to have landed a regular major title, has won three major championships in the over-50s ranks since joining the tour in 2013. The Scot said he felt discomfort at the end of his third round but returned to the course on Sunday after treatment. “I decided the prudent thing was to go in and get checked,” Montgomerie said. “I had all these CAT scans and all this stuff. I had two hours to do it this morning and the staff of the hospital was superb.”At 51 years of age, Montgomorie has at least won one major title, that of Oldest Living Scotsman. Anyone feeding him deep fried battered pizza will be disqualified.

In more golfing drama, Australian golfer Jason Day has collapsed on the final hole of his second round at the US Open Championship in Washington with a bout of vertigo! Day was walking down the ninth, his final hole of the day, when he collapsed. After a delay of several minutes, he got back to his feet and made a bogey. Day has been suffering from fatigue and dizzy spells for the better part of a year, withdrawing from last year’s World Golf Championship Bridgestone Invitational after a bout and once again having issues in 2015. The 27-year-old has taken a series of tests over the last month to try to pinpoint the problem but has yet to get an answer. Brain tumour anyone?

Writer and artist Alasdair Gray has been seriously injured after a fall at his home. An ambulance was called to the 80 year old’s house in the West End of Glasgow at around 2am on Thursday, and he was taken to hospital for treatment. He is best known as author of the novel Lanark, but is also regarded for his artwork – including a series of murals. His injuries are not believed to be life threatening at this time but we all know what a fall does to an 80 year old!!

And finally, if you go down to the woods today, you might be in for a huge surprise, like a man taking his regular morning stroll who was killed by an elephant that had escaped from a nearby circus. The 65-year-old was walking in the woods near Buchen, a town in south-west Germany, when the African elephant attacked him shortly after 5am local time. What the fuck he was doing in the woods at 5am wasn’t explained and Police declined to say what injuries the unnamed man suffered. The 34-year-old female elephant, called Baby, was captured and returned to the circus. Police are now investigating whether someone let the elephant out of its secure enclosure, and why the animal acted aggressively toward the man.

On This Day

• 1854 – The first Victoria Cross is awarded during the bombardment of Bomarsund in the Åland Islands.
• 1948 – Columbia Records introduces the long-playing record album in a public demonstration at the Waldorf-Astoria Hotel in New York, New York.
• 1982 – John Hinckley is found not guilty by reason of insanity for the attempted assassination of U.S. President Ronald Reagan.
• 2004 – SpaceShipOne becomes the first privately funded spaceplane to achieve spaceflight.

Deaths

• 1377 – Edward III of England (b. 1312)
• 1652 – Inigo Jones, English architect (b. 1573)
• 2001 – John Lee Hooker, American singer-songwriter and guitarist (b. 1916)

Last Week’s Birthdays

Donald Trump (69), Boy George (54), Steffi Graf (46), Jim Belushi (61), Helen Hunt (52), Courtney Cox (51), Ice Cube (46), Neil Patrick Harris (42), Barry Manilow (72), Newt Gingrich (72), Venus Williams (35), Paul McCartney (73), Isabella Rossellini (63), Alison Moyet (54), Richard Madden (29), Kathleen Turner (61), Paula Abdul (53), Mia Sara (48), Zoe Saldana (37), Olympia Dukakis (84), Martin Landau (87), Danny Aiello (82), Brian Wilson (73), Lionel Richie (66), John Goodman (63), Nicole Kidman (48) and Christopher Mintz-Plasse (26).

Next Week peeps!

What a week! It seemed like there was a mass extinction of celebrities, but for us here at Dead Pool Towers, the only death that mattered was Christopher Lee. Many of you had him listed, but strangely none of you saw fit to declare him a Cert, which is usually a sign of a well loved celebrity.

So, 57 points are awarded thusly: Luke, Ashley, Liz, Julie, Kirsty, Paul G, & Nickie, well done to all of you, especially those of you who have scored for the first time this year.

This week I’ve taken the liberty of adding the lists to the email so you can refresh your memory on who you and everyone else has on their lists of doom. After all, its been over six months and I bet you’re wondering why you’re still part of this abominable endeavour.

So take a quick look, correct me if I’ve gone wrong or missed a death and remember that there’s months to go yet, so if like me you’ve yet to score, all is not lost, who knows what will happen! Maybe a plane crash at the Oscars….

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Vincent Bugliosi, 80, American attorney and author (Helter Skelter), cancer.
• Ronnie Gilbert, 88, American singer-songwriter (The Weavers) and actress (Running on Empty).
• Sir Christopher Lee, 93, British actor, voice artist, and singer (Dracula, The Lord of the Rings, Star Wars), heart failure.
• James Last, 86, German composer and big band leader.
• Robert Chartoff, 81, American film producer (Rocky, Raging Bull, Ender’s Game), Oscar winner (1977), pancreatic cancer.
• Igor Kostin, 78, Romanian-born Ukrainian photographer, took first pictures of Chernobyl disaster, traffic collision.
• Ron Moody, 91, British actor (Oliver!, The Animals of Farthing Wood, EastEnders).
• Dusty Rhodes, 69, American Hall of Fame professional wrestler (NWA, WCW, WWE).

In Other News 

The Foo Fighters have cancelled two gigs after frontman Dave Grohl sustained “at least one fracture” when he fell off the stage during a concert in Gothenburg, Sweden. The band were two songs into their set at the Ullevi stadium when Grohl went to jump on a ramp but missed and fell into the security area. “I think I just broke my leg,” the singer told the crowd as he lay on the ground. “I’m going to go to hospital. I’m going to fix my leg. And then I’m going to come back.” Eyewitnesses told the media that the band continued the concert, playing cover versions whilst Grohl sought medical attention. A fan said, “He reappeared after an hour to continue the concert, sitting in a chair with his leg bandaged. It was surreal to see him perform on stage with a medic holding his leg. The crowd was just amazed that he was carrying on. He was just phenomenal. I can’t see how he will make the next gig in Holland but then he’s more of a man than I am so I wouldn’t put it past him.”

This year has seen several musicians injured on stage. Florence Welch of Florence and the Machine broke her foot leaping off stage at the Coachella Music Festival in April, while U2 guitarist The Edge misjudged his step and fell off the stage during the opening night of the band’s Innocence and Experience tour. Madonna also fell off stage during a live performance at the Brit Awards. The pop star continued her performance, but said she suffered “a little bit of whiplash”. It’s a perilous old game being a musician these days!

The former England and Tottenham striker Jimmy Greaves has left hospital just over a month after suffering a severe stroke. The 75-year-old was admitted into intensive care on 3 May but his friend and agent Terry Baker has now confirmed Greaves “has left hospital and entered a rehabilitation unit for the next few weeks”. Baker added in a statement on Facebook: “He has improved considerably but there is still a very long way to go.” Which suggests that Greavesy is now struggling with soup and incapable of wiping his own arse.

Paul Gascoigne has revealed that he is “happy in life” in a Radio 5 interview. Gascoigne, 48, knew something was wrong during his playing days and spoke of his relief at finally being diagnosed as an alcoholic and admits that he’s spent £300,000 on rehab clinics. Although he still manages to go on a bender now and again, he denied that he’s a piss addled sot and the media has totally blown up the whole situation. He still reckons he’s the best footballer ever to have played for England, which may be true, but is a sad statement about English football. 2/1 he dies during a xmas binge of sadness.

A Spanish bullfighter gored in the testicles by a bull he was fighting has left hospital. Marco Galan underwent surgery after Sunday’s incident where he was lifted into the air after black fighting bull thrust its left horn into his groin. The infirmary said in its medical report that he had suffered a “bull horn wound in the scrotum which caused bruising and evisceration of the left testicle”. Sadly the brutal bastard will survive, unlike the poor bull. At least he managed to get some kind of restitution before he was killed for ‘entertainment’.

And finally, if you think you’re having a bad day, think about this poor fucker who has survived after being stung up to 1,000 times by tens of thousands of bees near Kingman in north-western Arizona after he disturbed a large hive in a shed in his backyard. “The number of bees in the shed was unbelievable,” a spokesman said. “The deputy who arrived said it was it was like something you’d see in the movies. It was just amazing.” Authorities said the man was working on the property when he was stung and ran to his vehicle, getting help from two passersby who were also stung. A beekeeper called to the scene was also stung 23 times. He told authorities it would probably take several days to fully contain the bees. A particular strain of bee has been menacing people and animals in Arizona in recent weeks, with some being hurt badly enough to require a hospital stay. Nature is finally turning on us!

On This Day

• 1404 – Welsh rebel leader Owain Glyndŵr, having declared himself Prince of Wales, allies himself with the French against King Henry IV of England.
• 1777 – The Stars and Stripes is adopted by Congress as the Flag of the United States.
• 1789 – Mutiny on the Bounty: HMS Bounty mutiny survivors including Captain William Bligh and 18 others reach Timor after a nearly 7,400 km (4,600 mi) journey in an open boat.
• 1789 – Whiskey distilled from maize is first produced by American clergyman the Rev Elijah Craig. It is named Bourbon because Rev Craig lived in Bourbon County, Kentucky.
• 1822 – Charles Babbage proposes a difference engine in a paper to the Royal Astronomical Society entitled “Note on the application of machinery to the computation of astronomical and mathematical tables”.
• 1919 – John Alcock and Arthur Whitten Brown depart from St. John’s, Newfoundland on the first nonstop transatlantic flight.
• 1949 – Albert II, a rhesus monkey, rides a V2 rocket to an altitude of 134 km (83 mi), thereby becoming the first monkey in space.
• 1962 – The European Space Research Organisation is established in Paris – later becoming the European Space Agency.
• 1966 – The Vatican announces the abolition of the Index Librorum Prohibitorum (“index of prohibited books”), which was originally instituted in 1557.
• 1967 – The People’s Republic of China tests its first hydrogen bomb.
• 1982 – Falklands War: Argentine forces in the capital Stanley conditionally surrender to British forces.
• 2002 – Near-Earth asteroid 2002 MN misses the Earth by 75,000 miles (121,000 km), about one-third of the distance between the Earth and the Moon.

Deaths

• 1927 – Jerome K. Jerome, English author (b. 1859)
• 1928 – Emmeline Pankhurst, English activist (b. 1857)
• 1946 – John Logie Baird, Scottish-English engineer (b. 1888)

Last Week’s Birthdays

Tom Jones (75), Liam Neeson (53), Bear Grylls (41), Bill Hader (37), Michael Cera (27), Anna Kournikova (34), Jerry Stiller (88), Nancy Sinatra (75), Griffin Dunne (60), Kayne West (38), Barbara Bush (90), Michael J. Fox (54), Johnny Depp (52), Natalie Portman (34), Elizabeth Hurley (50), Gene Wilder (81), Hugh Laurie (56), Shia LeBeouf (29), George H. W. Bush (91), Malcolm McDowell (72), Tim Allen (62), Ally Sheedy (53), Steve-O (41),

Next Week peeps!

Afternoon all, another fun packed edition of the Dead Pool Newsletter to keep you amused on a sunny Sunday afternoon. Alas no listed deaths this week, but plenty of news, in fact so much news I’ve had to leave out more than I put in.

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Katherine Chappell, 29, American visual effects editor (Game of Thrones, Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Godzilla), lioness attack.
• Charles Kennedy, 55, British politician, Leader of the Liberal Democrats (1999–2006), MP (1983–2015), internal haemorrhage.
• Tiffany Two, 27, American cat, world’s oldest living cat.
• Tariq Aziz, 79, Iraqi politician, Foreign Minister (1983–1991).
• Paolo Tullio, 65, Italian-born Irish Michelin Star-winning chef (Armstrong’s Barn) and resident food critic (The Restaurant).
• Jerry Collins, 34, Samoan-born New Zealand rugby union player (national team), traffic collision.
• Richard Johnson, 87, English actor (The Amorous Adventures of Moll Flanders, Julius Caesar, The Haunting).

In Other News

The former snooker player Willie Thorne has announced he is suffering from prostate cancer. Thorne, 61, told the media that the cancer was discovered at an early stage and said he was hopeful of making a full recovery. Thorne, a former UK Championship runner-up who has forged a career as a snooker commentator with the BBC since retiring from playing, has been battling gambling problems. He said: “I feel numb with everything that has gone on. But I am determined to summon the strength and fight. “I’m scared because I’ve spent two years living a lie with the gambling, depression and debts – I do wonder if this has been brought on by the stress.” Sounds like a good bet for next year!

Nichelle Nichols, best known for her role as Lieutenant Uhura  in TV’s Star Trek, has suffered a stroke. In an updated post on Facebook, her agent reported that Nichols was “awake, eating, in good spirits and able to have full conversations.” “Her right side has shown minor signs of mobility loss but she is not showing any signs of paralyses. The 82-year-old was handpicked by Star Trek creator Gene Roddenberry to appear in the original 1960s TV series. Her casting as fourth in command of the USS Enterprise broke many racial barriers, with Nichols becoming the first black woman to share a kiss with a white man (William Shatner) on US television in 1966.

A BBC journalist is facing disciplinary action for killing off the Queen on Twitter after apparently mistaking a rehearsal of the announcement of her death for the real thing. The Corporation apologised after Ahmen Khawaja, a broadcast journalist, sent a tweet saying: “‘Queen Elizabrth has died [sic]’:@BBCWorld”. It was sent during one of the corporation’s regular rehearsals for royal deaths, but insiders said Ms Khawaja was not taking part in the exercise and appeared to have overheard the rehearsal and tweeted what she thought was breaking news. Ms Khawaja, 31,had previously sent a tweet saying: “BREAKING: Queen Elizabeth is being treated at King Edward 7th Hospital in London. Statement due shortly: @BBCWorld.” By sheer coincidence the Queen was, in fact, at the very same hospital for her annual check-up at the time, but sources said Ms Khawaja did not know that.

The former German chancellor Helmut Kohl is reported to be in a critical condition in the intensive-care unit of a German hospital. Kohl, 85, who served as chancellor between 1982 and 1998 and is known as the architect of German reunification, was admitted to the Heidelberg’s university hospital in south-west Germany following an operation on his intestines. Neither his office nor the Christian Democratic Union (CDU) has responded to requests by German media for information about his condition. The hospital said his family might release a statement.

Thailand’s King Bhumibol Adulyadej has gone back into hospital, only a few weeks after being discharged. A statement from the palace on Sunday said he was undergoing tests at the Siriraj  Hospital in Bangkok but did not say when he was likely to return to his home in the coastal city of Hua Hin. As you know, the 87-year-old monarch has been in poor health for some years and is a good shout for next years lists.

Spanish singer Enrique Iglesias has been receiving treatment after two of his fingers were injured by a drone camera during a concert in Mexico. The singer had been attempting to grab the drone, apparently in an attempt to give fans a point-of-view shot from the stage. At the time the 40 year old singer was “semi-treated” at the side of the stage to stop the bleeding, and was advised to end the show. However, he performed for another 30 minutes before seeking further treatment where he found his mangled hand was worse than expected. Following reconstructive surgery on Monday, it was announced he would need several weeks to recover.

And finally, Stephen Hawking has said he would consider ending his own life if he became a burden to others or if he had “nothing more to contribute”. But the physicist and cosmologist told a forthcoming BBC programme he knows he has much more scientific work to do, despite his advanced motor neurone disease. “To keep someone alive against their wishes is the ultimate indignity,” Hawking, 73, told his interviewer, the comedian Dara O’Briain. “I would consider assisted suicide only if I were in great pain or felt I had nothing more to contribute but was just a burden to those around me.” Let’s see what he does!

On This Day

• 1692 – Port Royal, Jamaica, was hit by a catastrophic earthquake; in just three minutes, 1,600 people were killed and 3,000 were seriously injured.
• 1832 – Asian cholera reaches Quebec, brought by Irish immigrants, and kills about 6,000 people in Lower Canada.
• 1862 – The United States and the United Kingdom agree to suppress the slave trade.
• 1893 – Mohandas Gandhi commits his first act of civil disobedience.
• 1965 – The Supreme Court of the United States hands down its decision in Griswold v. Connecticut, effectively legalizing the use of contraception by married couples.
• 1982 – Priscilla Presley opens Graceland to the public; the bathroom where Elvis Presley died five years earlier was kept off-limits.

Deaths

• 1329 – Robert the Bruce, Scottish king (b. 1274)
• 1937 – Jean Harlow, American actress and singer (b. 1911)
• 1954 – Alan Turing, English mathematician, cryptanalyst, & computer scientist (b. 1912)
• 1970 – E. M. Forster, English author (b. 1879)
• 1980 – Henry Miller, American author (b. 1891)

Last Week’s Birthdays

Angelina Jolie (40), Clint Eastwood (85), Brooke Shields (50), Mark Wahlberg (44), Heidi Klum (42), Colin Farrell (39), Alanis Morissette (41), Morgan Freeman (78), Russell Brand (40), Dana Carvey (60), Lea Thompson (54), Ronnie Wood (58), Jonathan Pryce (68), Charlie Watts (74), Paul Giamatti (48), Robert Englund (68), Bruce Dern (79), Rafael Nadal (29), Justin Long (37), Zachary Quinto (38), Tom Berenger (66), Sandra Bernhard (60) and Jason Isaacs (52).

Next Week peeps!