Dead Pool 4th June 2023

A very quiet week indeed! As the continued hounding of Philip Schofield for being gay continues, I stand here quite surprised that he’s not listed! Well, there’s plenty of time for that, I doubt the media have had their pound of flesh just yet. Since no-one worthy of note has died in the last week, I’ll keep this edition very short.

Look Who You Could Have Had:

In Other News

A woman won the cheese rolling competition despite knocking herself unconscious during the event. 19-year-old Delaney Irving fell whilst pursuing a 3kg Gloucester cheese wheel down Coopers Hill in Brockworth, near Gloucester. Irving said she didn’t realise she had won the race until she woke up in the medical tent. Speaking to the Flying Monkeys, the 19-year-old said “I remember running, then bumping my head, and then I woke up in the tent. I still don’t really believe it, but it feels great.” Hundreds took part in the event during the last bank holiday, coming from all over the world. Irving, who is from Vancouver Island in Canada said that the race was “good… now that I remember it.” Matt Crolla, 28, from Manchester won the first race of the day, telling the Flying Monkeys that there is no way to “train” for the sport, saying “it’s just being an idiot.” Some viewers called participants “mad,” whilst others congratulated Irving on her win, seeing the fun side of the sport. Contestants suffered injuries including broken ankles, a concussion, a broken leg, and a suspected seizure. The Tewkesbury Borough Safety Group (SAG) said police and fire services would no longer staff the event until organisers came up with a safety plan, which sounds a bit churlish as there’s nothing safe about the event, so one could argue that they themselves put more people at risk by refusing to attend the event. Double-crewed ambulances and rapid response vehicles needed a police escort to gain access to the site, in order to clear a path through the crowds, which could have been avoided if SAG pulled their heads from their arses. “This put a strain on the resources of both Gloucestershire Constabulary and South West Ambulance Service NHS Foundation Trust for a considerable time,” the SAG added. The group, which advises on safety at events, said it had “no desire or power” to stop the event but called for organisers to come up with a decent safety plan. “In the interim, police, fire and ambulance services will not be in attendance at the event, though of course will respond to any emergencies,” the SAG statement added. The annual event attracts thousands of spectators, including some from across the world. 

Jonnie Irwin has revealed that he has been admitted to hospital as he deals with terminal cancer. The Escape to the Country presenter, 49, said in November that he “doesn’t know how long” he has left to live, after first being diagnosed with lung cancer in August 2020, which later spread to his brain. He went public with his diagnosis in November 2022, after keeping it a secret from his fans for more than two years. Since his announcement, Irwin has been keeping his social media followers up to date with his condition. In the latest update, the father-of-three revealed he has gone into hospital to be “monitored” but hopes to be released in time for a scheduled appearance at A Place In The Sun Live in London this weekend.. He wrote in an Instagram post: “In hospital this week monitoring a changeover in my pain management regime. Fingers crossed I’ll be out in time to make an appearance on Sunday for this weekends @aplaceinthesunofficial LIVE event at @olympialondon in Kensington.” If he is released from the hospital and attends the event, Irwin will be joined on stage by fellow presenters Jasmine Harman, Ben Hillman and Laura Hamilton. He concluded the post: “Hope to see you there…x.” In a new podcast OneChat released last week, Irwin said that he was living under a “dark cloud” for the two years he hid his cancer from the world, adding that he kept his condition a secret so that he could continue working and “provide” for his family. Irwin and his wife Jessica have three children; three-year-old son Rex and two-year-old twins Rafa and Cormac. Elsewhere in the interview revealed that he had been close to death’s door “at least twice”, emphasising that he prefers to think of his situation as “living with cancer, rather than dying from cancer”. Irwin explained how he began to feel “alive” again after going public with his illness, but noted that didn’t mean his journey had been easy. “I have been close to death’s door, twice at least,” he said. He added: “You lose your memory, you lose your patience. I have got a very short temper. It’s not made me a better person, that’s for sure.” In March, Irwin gave a health update, telling The Flying Monkeys: “I’m weak now, fragile and my memory is terrible… but I’m still here.”

On This Day

  • 1784 – Élisabeth Thible becomes the first woman to fly in an untethered hot air balloon. Her flight covers four kilometres in 45 minutes, and reached 1,500 metres altitude (estimated).
  • 1913 – Emily Davison, a suffragist, runs out in front of King George V‘s horse at The Derby. She is trampled, never regains consciousness, and dies four days later.
  • 1940 – World War II: The Dunkirk evacuation ends: the British Armed Forces completes evacuation of 338,000 troops from Dunkirk in France. To rally the morale of the country, Winston Churchill delivers, only to the House of Commons, his famous “We shall fight on the beaches” speech.
  • 1977 – JVC introduces its VHS videotape at the Consumer Electronics Show in Chicago. It will eventually prevail against Sony’s rival Betamax system in a format war to become the predominant home video medium.
  • 1989 – The Tiananmen Square protests are suppressed in Beijing by the People’s Liberation Army, it leaves an estimated 10,000 dead.


Last Week’s Birthdays

Angelina Jolie (48), Bruce Dern (87), Noah Wyle (52), Russell Brand (48), Sean Pertwee (59), Bradley Walsh (63), Imogen Poots (34), James Purefoy (59), Bill Paterson (78), Suzi Quatro (73), Awkwafina (35), Morena Baccarin (44), Jewel Staite (41), Justin Long (45), Wentworth Miller (51), Zachary Quinto (46), Dominic Cooper (45), Dana Carvey (68), Liam Cunningham (62), Brian Cox (77), Tom Holland (27), Morgan Freeman (86), Jonathan Pryce (76), Heidi Klum (50), Amy Schumer (42), Alanis Morissette (49), Robert Powell (79), Clint Eastwood (93), Colin Farrell (47), Brooke Shields (58), Lea Thompson (62), Tom Berenger (74), Sharon Gless (80), Colm Meaney (70), Stephen Tobolowsky (72), Keir Dullea (87), Harry Enfield (62), Ted Levine (66), Annette Bening (65), Laverne Cox (51), and Danny Elfman (70).

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