Dead Pool 1st May 2022

Welcome to another bank holiday special, in which nothing special happens! And what’s this? More points to award?! Yup! Ceri had Kane Tenaka listed, so 31 points! Paul C had her down as his Woman, 131 points and Dave listed her as his Cert, 131 points!! Well done all three of you. Which means we have a new points leader! 

Look Who You Could Have Had:

In Other News

Kim Woodburn has been rushed to hospital – and fans are worried for her. The 80-year-old TV star posted a photo from her bed, revealing that she has a mystery illness and underwent treatment. Kim managed to sit up in bed, while connected to an oxygen machine, and gave a smile to the camera. She appeared to show she was feeling in good spirits, by placing a cardboard bowl on top of her head, pretending it was a hat. Sharing how she can’t get back to her own home, Kim captioned the joyful photo: “My hospital outfit. Do you like the hat? Home tonight! Yippeee!” Kim is a ‘household name’ and rose to fame on show How Clean is Your House. She came onto screens back in 2003, fronting the show alongside Aggie MacKenzie. Before fame, she was working as a professional cleaner and earned around £1,000 a month. However things changed for the star when she entered the Big Brother house in 2017. She joined on Day 11 and finished in third place. The star was constantly involved in heated blows with her housemates on the show – making some of the most memorable moments in reality television history. She also had an infamous row with Coleen Nolan on Loose Women. Viewers got more than they bargained for when Kim and Coleen appeared on the show in 2018. With their explosive spat ending in tears and storming off, it’s safe to say their simmering feud had been a long time coming before their appearance on the ITV show. The two woman clashed in a highly charged episode billed to be a reconciliation after their Celebrity Big Brother stint, in which Kim claimed Coleen had ganged on on her with seven other housemates to bully her – which Coleen denied. The chaotic interview stunned viewers of the usually family-friendly show, as Coleen and Kim went to war on live TV, culminating in the How Clean Is Your House star storming off the  set in tears. 

Former Emmerdale star Malandra Burrows has vowed to stay positive while she is treated for breast cancer. The 56-year-old has had a stage three tumour removed from her left breast and is about to start chemotherapy. But she says: “I do not want to make this cancer my life. “When I tell people, they say to me, ‘I can’t believe you can talk about it and be so positive,’ but it’s the reality and you have to be positive.” Malandra, who portrayed Kathy Glover in the ITV soap for 16 years, was diagnosed in February after discovering a lump the month before. After seeing her GP and being referred to a hospital for a scan and an ultrasound, a consultant asked her to return and bring someone with her. Malandra said: “I thought, ‘I’ve got to take this on my own.’ I’m single and I felt I couldn’t do that to a friend. When I went in, I found myself greeted by a Macmillan nurse and I just knew. She nearly broke down telling me, but I just went, ‘Don’t be daft!’ We’ll get through it and I’m going to ring that bell. I had already galvanised myself before hearing the news so I’ve never cried about it. I’ve kind of gone into combat mode. If I look back, I’ve given it everything I can and that’s all I can do. When it’s your life at stake, you’re prepared to do everything to get through. That’s helped me focus.” Doctors told Malandra her type of cancer may have been caused by going through the menopause. She told our flying monkeys: “Davina [McCall] has done a fabulous job of bringing menopause to the forefront, but I had never heard of menopausal cancer. They told me that, because of the oestrogen and the way your hormonal balance changes, it’s one of the most major causes of breast cancer.” She decided to share her story to help raise awareness and encourage women to get checked out: “I tell all ladies, go and get a mammogram. No matter what age you are, if something seems suspicious, go to your GP. 

Paul ‘Bonehead’ Arthurs has revealed he has cancer. The Oasis legend and former guitarist, who currently plays as part of Liam Gallagher’s  solo band, took to social media to share the news last Tuesday. Sharing a statement, he began: “Just to let you all know I’m going to be taking a break from playing for a while. I’ve been diagnosed with tonsil cancer, but the good news is it’s treatable and I’ll be starting a course of treatment soon. I’ll keep you posted how it’s going”. The Manchester rocker continued: “I’m gutted I’m missing the gigs with Liam and the band. Have the best summer and enjoy the gigs if you’re going, I’ll see you soon xxx”. Fans and artists alike have rushed to offer the Manchester rocker their love and support, with his longtime friend and touring bandmate Liam sharing his response to the news. Also taking to Twitter, the Everything’s Electric singer wrote: “Sending BIG love to the 1 n only Bonehead and his family wishing you a speedy recovery we’re all thinking of you rasta you’ll be back on stage bfore you can say r we doing Colombia LG x”, because picking up the phone is far too much trouble…  The news of course means that Bonehead will miss Liam’s shows across the summer, including two iconic dates at Knebworth on 3rd and 4th June, which were set for the Queen’s Jubilee weekend. Bonehead is credited with being one of the founding members of the legendary Manchester band. In the late 1980s, while working as a building contractor, he started a band called The Rain with his friends Paul “Guigsy” McGuigan, Tony McCarroll and Chris Hutton, which would later go on become Oasis when Liam Gallagher replaced the late Paul Ashbee, the man who introduced Liam to Bonehead, believes the rhythm guitarist was even more instrumental in the makings of the band than people think. “People think it was Noel and Liam who created the sound of Oasis but it wasn’t – it was Bonehead,” he told the flying monkeys. ”Liam was the frontman, Noel was the poet who came later. It was a jigsaw puzzle. It was meant to be. “Definitely Maybe was Noel’s therapy, it was his poetry – but it was Bonehead’s core sound. I know because I’d heard it back when they were still called The Rain.”

On This Day

  • 1807 – The Slave Trade Act 1807 takes effect, abolishing the slave trade within the British Empire.
  • 1840 – The Penny Black, the first official adhesive postage stamp, is issued in the United Kingdom.
  • 1945 – World War II: A German newsreader officially announces that Adolf Hitler has “fallen at his command post in the Reich Chancellery fighting to the last breath against Bolshevism and for Germany”. He had in fact died the day earlier.
  • 1956 – The polio vaccine developed by Jonas Salk is made available to the public.
  • 1994 –Three-time Formula One champion Ayrton Senna dies from an accident during the San Marino Grand Prix.
  • 1999 – The body of British climber George Mallory is found on Mount Everest, 75 years after his disappearance in 1924.

Deaths

Last Week’s Birthdays

Jamie Dornan (40), Julie Benz (50), Joanna Lumley (76), Gal Gadot (37), Kirsten Dunst (40), Sam Heughan (42), Johnny Galecki (47), Burt Young (82), Michelle Pfeiffer (64), Daniel Day-Lewis (65), Uma Thurman (52), Kate Mulgrew (67), Jerry Seinfeld (68), Willie Nelson (89), Penélope Cruz (48), Jessica Alba (41), Jay Leno (72), Jenna Coleman (36), Russell T. Davies (59), Sheena Easton (63), Pablo Schreiber (44), Channing Tatum (42), Giancarlo Esposito (64), Tom Welling (45), Kevin James (57), Jet Li (59), Joan Chen (61), Renée Zellweger (53), Al Pacino (82), Gina Torres (53), Hank Azaria (58), Talia Shire (76), and William Roache (90).

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