Dead Pool 5th October 2014

Hi folks, a very quiet week this time, so I’ve pulled out all the stops to produce what I can only call an epic saga of news and entertainment for your perusal. I know, there’s no need to thank me, honestly, I know I’m particularly more awesome than your next door neighbour, so let’s just get on with is shall we?

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Sheila Tracy, 80, British broadcaster and musician (Big Band Special).
• Lynsey de Paul, 64, English singer-songwriter (“Won’t Somebody Dance with Me“), brain haemorrhage.
• Rob Skipper, 28, British rock musician (The Holloways).
• Jean-Claude Duvalier, 63, Haitian politician, President (1971–1986), heart attack.

In Other News

The television presenter Michaela Strachan has revealed she was diagnosed with breast cancer. Sadly, the Springwatch host said she was forced to have both breasts removed after the cancer was discovered in a mammogram at the start of the year. The 48-year-old, who is set to undergo reconstructive surgery, stressed that her experience showed the importance of regular checkups.

Walmart – owners of the truck that crashed into Tracy Morgan’s limousine contend that his injuries and the death of a passenger were partly their own fault because the 30 Rock comic was not wearing a seatbelt, so nothing to do with the fact that their speeding/sleeping driver hadn’t slept for over 24 hours and managed to total seven vehicles in the crash. I don’t know about how you feel about these things, but these lawyers sometimes talk out of their arses! I’m voting Walmart as cunt of the week!

The British National Party says it has expelled its ex-leader Nick Griffin. In a statement, the BNP accused him of trying to “destabilise” the party and “harassing” party members, so nothing to do with the fact the guy is a twat! The report also suggested that he had ignored warnings from Adam Walker, the party’s chairman, that he was bringing the BNP into disrepute! Disrepute!!!! We better keep an eye on Griffin, or try to, hard to look the man in the face with that massive squint, he’s pretty much on a downward spiral, having being declared bankrupt, fired from his job and now being ignored by his racist friends. A suicide in the making?

Sir Bobby Charlton has been taken to hospital after complaining of stomach pains whilst playing in the Alfred Dunhill Championship pro-am event in Scotland. A source at the hospital said that the Manchester United director, 76, was treated for stomach pains in the accident and emergency department but was then discharged and allowed home. The episode was described as ‘a bit of a turn’, maybe a strong Vindaloo the night before, perhaps its a tumour, who knows, let’s see how it pans out.

Michael Caine has said he is ready to retire at the end of the year, and we all know what happens to men that retire! Caine has had a glittering career that has seen him win two Oscars and become one of Hollywood’s best-known British actors. The 81-year-old has acted in more than a hundred films including Alfie, Zulu, The Italian Job and Get Carter admitted that “I’ve retired, sort of. I’m doing a second one of Now You See Me, a picture I did about magicians,” he said. “I do that in December and then I stop.” We’re wondering if he’s talking about acting or life…

Following news of AC/DC guitarist Malcolm Youngs permanent departure from the band, his family have now confirmed that he’s being treated for dementia. The announcement follows news of AC/DC’s 17th studio album, Rock or Bust, which is produced by Brendan O’Brien and will be released on 1 December. It is the first AC/DC album not to feature Young, most likely because he forgot where he left his guitar.

Good news for us, actor Lynda Bellingham, 66, has decided to stop taking chemotherapy for her cancer riddled body at the end of November with the hope she’ll make it to the end of January, so it  looks like all of us will be starting off the year with 84 points. Let’s hope she has an awesome Christmas and I’m sure you would all like to join me in wishing her well until January.

The long, complicated saga of Casey Kasem’s final resting place has taken another turn as his daughter, Kerri, announced on Twitter that the funeral home in Oslo, Norway has refused to bury the late radio star. The Top 40 star passed away in June in Gig Harbor, Washington, one wonders what’s left to bury after four months of rotting and globe trotting, however, I’m sure that the family know what they are doing, so feel free to sign the petition to have the slightly fluid and bony corpse flown back to the loving arms of his children.

More good news, Oklahoma prison officials unveiled new execution procedures on Tuesday to replace those used in April when an inmate writhed and moaned before being declared dead 43 minutes after his lethal injection began. The new guidelines allow the state to keep using the sedative midazolam, so you wont have to listen to the inmate moan and watch him writhe on the table as he dies. I’m sure all of those on Death Row will be so pleased to hear this news, they will still feel all the pain, but those watching wont have a clue! Well done Oklohoma!

I’m sure some of you have seen footage of Larry Evans on social media, he’s the 57 stone guy who’s sharing his workouts with the world like some kind of inspirational guru. Obviously we can’t disparage his attempts at getting fit and back into shape, but 57 stone and rigorous exercise don’t mix very well. Will he be famous enough to cut the mustard? Will his next dive into the pool cause that fatal coronary? Will bench pressing those hamburgers cause a stroke? Who knows, let’s watch and find out, but as someone who has a slight strain lifting his wine to his mouth, I’m not holding out much hope for this guy.

On This Day

• 1914 – World War I: first aerial combat resulting in an intentional fatality.
• 1947 – The first televised White House address is given by U.S. President Harry S. Truman.
• 1962 – Dr. No, the first in the James Bond film series, is released.
• 1962 – The Beatles‘ first single, “Love Me Do” backed with “P.S. I Love You“, is released in the United Kingdom.
• 1969 – The first episode of Monty Python’s Flying Circus airs on BBC One.

Deaths

• 1983 – Earl Tupper, American inventor and businessman, founded the Tupperware Corporation (b. 1907)
• 2011 – Steve Jobs, American businessman, co-founder and of Apple Inc. (b. 1955)
• 2011 – Charles Napier, American actor (b. 1936)

Five diseases far deadlier than Ebola found in the US by KoA

Since Ebola has reached Texas, I thought we would cover some other diseases that are already killing thousands in the US – let’s look at five currently or recently observed in the US with higher fatality rates.

Amoebic Meningoencephalitis

A rare but highly lethal disease which sees the nervous system infected by a type of amoeba which can be found in warm, stagnant freshwater including swimming pools and lakes. Only five people have ever survived the disease, representing a 97 per cent fatality rate. Infection can occur if contaminated water enters deep into the sinus cavities. There are few symptoms in the first few days of infection beyond a loss of sense of smell, but most of those infected die within 14 days of exposure.

Rabies

Rabies is still present in all parts of the world except for Japan, parts of Western Europe and Australasia, and Antarctica, killing 55,000 annually. Spread by bites or scratches from infected animals, the disease in nearly always fatal once symptoms develop, typically one to three months after infection. A range of animals found in the US can also spread the disease, including bats, skunks, raccoons, foxes, coyotes and even groundhogs. Run now, run for the hills!

Anthrax

Anthrax used to kill hundreds of thousands around the world every year. However, the vaccine developed by Louis Pasteur has seen this vastly diminish. The disease is usually picked up by grazing animals from spores of bacteria in the soil, which can turn into inhalational anthrax, which was known as “woolsorters’ disease” due to the risk of inhaling spores suffered by those in the wool trade. Without treatment, only about 10 – 15% of patients with inhalation anthrax survive.

The Plague

We all remember this from school history lessons, the 14th-century Black Plague was just one of three global pandemics in history, which have collectively killed up to 200 million people. But it is still around, even in America! From 1990-2005, a total of 107 cases of plague were reported in the United States. Mortality from pneumonic plague approaches 100 per cent when untreated, while some strains of bubonic plague can be as high as 70 per cent.

HIV/AIDS

New research this week has claimed the first ever case of the HIV/AIDS pandemic can be traced to Kinshasa in the DR Congo in the 1920s. Since then it has spread across the world infecting some 75 million people and killing 36 million of them. It’s hard to put an exact figure on mortality as treatments vary substantially around the world and are constantly developing, while many die years or even decades after infection, however, the Control of Communicable Diseases Manual puts the case fatality rate among those untreated in a developed country at 80 to 90 per cent in the first five years.

Last Week’s Birthdays

Victoria Silvstedt (40), Brigitte Bardot (80), Mira Sorvino (47), Hilary Duff (27), Dita Von Teese (42), Jerry Lee Lewis (80), Johnny Mathis (79), Julie Andrews (79), Randy Quaid (64), Jimmy Carter (90), Sting (63), Gwen Stefani (45), Neve Campbell (41), Seann William Scott (38), Clive Owen (50), Lena Headey (41), Jackie Collins (77), Susan Sarandon (68) and Alicia Silverstone (38).

2014 League Table

[confidential]

Next Week peeps!