Dead Pool 31st May 2015

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Sadly, no points again this week, but a plethora of other deaths and plenty of death related news for you to enjoy nevertheless. Without further ado:

Look Who You Could Have Had:

In Other News 

Actor Unknown, who starred in Lawrence of Arabia and Doctor Zhivago in the 1960s, has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. The 83-year-old star’s agent confirmed the news, just in case you didn’t believe him. His son Tarek told us “He still knows he’s a famous actor. The loss of memory affects above all specific things, details like when he was in a specific place or who he acted with in a specific film, he remembers, for example, that it was Doctor Zhivago but he’s forgotten when it was filmed. He can talk about the film but he forgets its name or he calls it something else instead like Lawrence of Arabia.” Egypt-born Sharif won two Golden Globe awards and an Oscar nomination for his role as Sherif Ali in David Lean’s 1962 epic Lawrence of Arabia, or did he? I’m not so sure anymore…

Jack-VettrianoScottish artist Jack Vettriano has announced he is giving up painting for the foreseeable future due to a recent accident. He has released a statement  saying that he has dislocated his shoulder and is facing a long recovery period. The statement from Mr Vettriano said: “As a result of a recent accident my right shoulder was dislocated and the reality is that I am going to be unable to paint in the foreseeable future. “I am undertaking a course of physiotherapy but am facing a long recovery period. In the meantime I would like to thank the public for their continued support and interest.” Paintings by the 61-year-old Fife artist, including The Singing Butler, have fetched huge sums and his prints and postcards sell in vast quantities for some reason.

_kerry_The US secretary of state, John Kerry, was in a stable condition in a Geneva hospital after being injured in an accident while cycling near Scionzier, France. Kerry, 71, was transported by helicopter to a hospital in Geneva, where he was being examined for a broken leg after hitting a kerb. X-rays at a Swiss hospital confirmed that Kerry fractured his right femur. “The secretary is stable and never lost consciousness, his injury is not life-threatening and he is expected to make a full recovery,” a spokesman said in a statement. The question arrises, WTF was a 71 year old doing on a bicycle??? Twat…

N IrelandNorthern Ireland’s first minister, Peter Robinson, has been discharged from hospital as he recovers from a suspected heart attack. The Democratic Unionist party leader was admitted to the Ulster hospital in Dundonald on Monday, before being moved to Belfast’s Royal Victoria hospital (RVH), where he was fitted with a heart stent. After leaving the RVH on Friday the 66-year-old paid tribute to the hospital’s staff. “Happy to be discharged and back home. Thanks to the wonderful RVH cardiac team – everyone a star,” he tweeted. Can’t be that serious if he can tweet.

Tracy_MorganComic and 30 Rock star Tracy Morgan has settled his legal case against Walmart over a crash which left him seriously injured, and killed his friend. A Walmart truck crashed in to the back of Morgan’s limo in June 2014, with prosecutors alleging the driver had not slept for more than 24 hours. Morgan’s lawyer, Benedict Morelli, said Walmart “took full responsibility for the accident”. Morgan, 46, was left in a critical condition following the crash, suffering a traumatic head injury, a broken leg, nose and ribs. In March, his lawyer said the star had not yet been able to get back to work but was “working very hard to get better, physically, emotionally and mentally.” Which is lawyer speak for ‘he’s absolutely fine’. Morgan will be interviewed tomorrow on NBC’s Today program by Matt Lauer, so you can see for yourself the extent of his injuries.

Sam-ShepardActor and Pulitzer prize-winning playwright Sam Shepard was arrested Monday on suspicion of drunken driving after a Santa Fe restaurant’s security complained about a possibly intoxicated driver. The 71-year-old Shepard told a police officer that he had two tequila drinks and was planning to drive home, Santa Fe police lieutenant Andrea Dobyns said Tuesday. “Our officer could smell alcohol on his breath, and he had bloodshot, watery eyes,” she said. Shepherd declined to take a breath test, but he did perform a field sobriety test, which he failed! Monday’s arrest appears to be Shepard’s second on charges of drunken driving. In January 2009, he was arrested on charges of speeding and drunken driving in the central Illinois town of Normal. Shepard was driving 16 mph over the 30 mph speed limit, police said. A breath test then indicated his blood-alcohol level was double the legal limit. The actor told police then that he had been at a tavern in nearby Bloomington and was heading to a hotel. I’m taking bets on liver failure..

oldest-twinsAnd finally, Britain’s oldest twins have died just weeks apart after being inseparable for 103 years. Glenys Thomas died in April before her heartbroken sister Florence Davies passed away within a month. The great-great-grandmothers were born in 1911, the year before the Titanic sunk. They lived through two world wars, the civil rights movement and huge advances in technology, but they always lived in the small mining village of Abertridwr, in Caerphilly, South Wales, where they had homes next to each other. The twins – believed to be the oldest identical twins in the world – built an interior door joining the two kitchens of their homes to make it easier to see each other. The pair did everything together before Mrs Thomas died on April 23, followed by Mrs Davies last Wednesday, May 20. Their family put their great age down to a “nice, quiet life”.

On This Day


Last Week’s Birthdays

Laverne Cox (31), Priscilla Presley (70), Bob Dylan (74), Stevie Nicks (67), Mike Myers (52), Lauren Hill (40), Annette Bening (57), Todd Bridges (50), Mel B (40), Lenny Kravitz (51), Helena Bonham Carter (49), Anne Heche (46), Tommy Chong (77), John C. Reilly (50), Sir Ian McKellen (76), Frank Oz (71), Pam Grier (66), Bobcat Goldthwait (53), Louis Gossett Jr. (79), Cilla Black (72), Siouxie Sioux (58), Paul Bettany (44), Andre 3000 (40), Joseph Finnes (45), Gladys Knight (71), La Toya Jackson (59), Rupert Everett (56), Stephen Gerrard (35), Colm Meaney (62), Noel Gallagher (48), Kylie Minogue (47), Jamie Oliver (40), Denise Van Outen (41) and Jim Broadbent (66).

Next Week peeps!

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