Dead Pool 15th September 2013


A week full of unknowns, but I bet you’ve all sampled a wafer thin After Eight mint and I’m sure you all know about Dolby, even if you didn’t realise it was named after the inventor.  Goes without saying that we have nil points to dispense, so if you’re stuck there at the bottom of the league table, don’t feel bad, at least you’re not the subject of this newsletter.

Look who you could have had:

In other news

thRemember Bob Geldof? The architect of Band Aid and everyone’s favourite living zombie has revealed to the nation that he’s going to be the first Irish astronaut in 2014. Wonderful what money can buy you isn’t it. One would have thought Bob would have donated his millions to Africa, now it looks like he wanted our cash to fund his trip into space. Elvis may have left the building, but Bob is going to leave the planet, let’s hope he burns up on re-entry and scores us some points, the rich bastard!

tony-bennLeft wing politician Tony Benn has been admitted to hospital after ‘feeling unwell’. The 88 year old former cabinet minister is said to be resting comfortably and in no immediate danger of dying, so surely this means he’s only got days to live.

th-1I’m going to take this opportunity to declare the death of Microsoft. The once mighty giant of computing has practically admitted defeat in slowly firing its boss, pulling derogatory adverts about Apple because they were truly shit, and last but not least, offering consumers £200 vouchers if they will trade in their iPad’s for a Surface. Yes Microsoft, you have finally lost the plot.

white-dressAnd now for something a little different. I thought I’d try out a new feature, Died on this Day. Pretty much what the title says.  On the day that the picture of Marilyn Monroe trying her best to hold her famous white dress down was taken, we lost… well, nobody interesting.  If it was yesterday I could have mentioned Patrick Swayze (2009) and Grace Kelley (1982). But at least we discovered Penicillin 85 years ago on this day. Well, that was a bit of a failure wasn’t it….

Onto last weeks birthdays: Michelle Williams (33), Colin Firth (53), Pink (34), Hugh Grant (53), Harry Connick Jnr (46), Adam Sandler (47), Eric Stonestreet (42), Henry Thomas (42) Elliott from ET is 42!!! Linda Gray (73), Joe Perry (63), Rachel Hunter (44), David Arquette (42), Sam Neill (66), Stella McCartney (42), Moby (48), Virginia Madsen (52), Michael Buble (38) and Guy Richie (45).

2013 League Table


Next Week peeps!

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