Dead Pool 25th January 2015

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A very busy week for deaths, as you may have surmised from the Klaxon e-mails. Alas nobody scored, so the league table remains the same for the time being. Without further ado…

Look Who You Could Have Had:

In Other News

TigerPoor old Tiger Woods, his career is in free fall and his love life in turmoil, but whilst trying to surprise his girlfriend Linsey Vonn at an Alpine Ski Competition, he manages to lose a tooth after being hit in the face by a camera! His agent later explained “During a crush of photographers at the awards’ podium, a media member with a shoulder-mounted video camera pushed and surged towards the stage, turned and hit Tiger in the mouth, his tooth was knocked out by the incident.” Oops! I bet that poor cameraman will be much poorer once the legal team get hold of him.

BrianVeteran actor Brian Blessed collapsed on stage with an apparent heart problem while playing King Lear – but, to the audience’s astonishment, returned to the stage 20 minutes later and  continued to act. The 78-year-old had just begun his lines at the start of the Shakespearean tragedy when he fainted, falling off a raised platform with his crown rolling to a halt at the front of stage. Fellow actor Noel White, playing the Earl of Kent, announced quietly “Ladies and gentlemen this is not part of the play. Is there a doctor in the house?” But after a brief inspection backstage and in the true spirit of “the show must go on”, Mr Blessed returned to the stage 20 minutes later to apologise to the final-preview audience for the interruption. He’s a tough old nut!

howard marksHoward Marks, the notorious former dope smuggler known as Mr Nice, has told the the media that he has been diagnosed with inoperable bowel cancer. Marks, 69, said this weekend. “It’s impossible to regret any part of my life when I feel happy and I am happy now, so I don’t have any regrets and have not had any for a very long time.” The cancer was diagnosed last autumn and Marks was told nothing could be done to stop the disease, which has now spread to his liver and lungs. As a drug smuggler in the 1980s, Marks had 43 aliases, 89 phone lines and 25 companies trading worldwide as fronts for money laundering. Sentenced to 25 years for drug smuggling, he was released in 1995, after seven years, for good behaviour. His 1996 autobiography, Mr Nice, sold more than a million copies and was made into a film starring fellow Welshman Rhys Ifans. Sounds like he’s not going to last…

PETER SUTCLIFFEPeter Sutcliffe aka The Yorkshire Ripper has been told he could lose what remains of his sight within a year. The murderer, who is already blind in one eye after a prison attack, was said to be “extremely upset” when he was told he has a severe condition linked to diabetes. Sutcliffe, now 68, killed 13 women (and attempted to kill seven more) between 1975 and 1980; he’s serving 20 life sentences at a high-security psychiatric hospital. Such shame that.

R.K.LaxmanAnother bad week for cartoonists; legendary Indian cartoonist RK Laxman, 94, is in a critical condition in hospital after suffering multiple-organ failure. Best known for his iconic “Common Man” character, he is credited with holding a mirror to Indian society with his satirical works targeting politicians. He’s currently in intensive care and on ventilator support.

Another failing cartoonist is Norm Breyfogle, who was one of the artists who changed Batman forever. He’s suffered a stroke that affected the left side of his body, including his drawing arm. His family is raising money to help pay his medical expenses, such a shame that he lives in the States where they couldn’t give a fuck about people who need medical help.

On This Day

Deaths

Last Week’s Birthdays

Jason Segel (35), Kevin Costner (60), Dolly Parton (69), Rainn Wilson (49), Neil Diamond (74), Emma Bunton (39), Katey Sagal (61), Geena Davis (59), Bill Maher (59), Buzz Aldrin (85), Jack Nicklaus (75), John Hurt (75), Rutger Hauer (71), Piper Laurie (83), Linda Blair (56), DJ Jazzy Jeff (50), Placido Domingo (74), Billy Ocean (65), Gil Gerard (72), Martin Shaw (70), Tom Baker (81), David Lynch (69), and Dave Bautista (46).

2015 League Table

[confidential]

Next week peeps!

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