Dead Pool 14th April 2024

Surprisingly, no points to hand out today, I could have sworn a couple of you had O.J.  

Next weeks issue will be dependent on whether WWIII has kicked off yet… 

Look Who You Could Have Had:

  • Lori and George Schappell, 62, American conjoined twins. 
  • Joe Kinnear, 77, Irish football player (Tottenham Hotspur, national team) and manager (Wimbledon), complications from vascular dementia
  • Peter Higgs, 94, British theoretical physicist, discoverer of the Higgs boson, Nobel Prize laureate (2013). 
  • O. J. Simpson, 76, American football player (Buffalo Bills) and actor (The Naked Gun, The Towering Inferno), prostate cancer. 
  • Roberto Cavalli, 83, Italian fashion designer and inventor. 
  • Eleanor Coppola, 87, American filmmaker (Hearts of Darkness: A Filmmaker’s Apocalypse, Paris Can Wait, Love Is Love Is Love). 

In Other News

Jackie Chan has responded to fans who were left “concerned” about his health following the release of a new photo of the star. The renowned actor and martial artist is known for his fitness, and was seen with grey hair at a recent event in Sichuan, China, sparking concern on social media once it went viral. Now, the Rush Hour star, who just turned 70, has responded to worries about his health, and revealed the reasons behind his appearance – which he admitted had frightened even his close friends. “Not so long ago, a lot of friends saw some recent photos of me on the internet, and they were all concerned about my health,” he wrote in a post on Instagram celebrating his 70th birthday on Sunday. “I want to take this opportunity to let everyone know, don’t worry!” He shared that he had donned the new look for a forthcoming role, but did not confirm any further details. “It’s just a character appearance for my latest movie. The character requires me to have white hair, white beard and look old. Over the years, I’ve always been willing to try new things for a movie, no matter if it’s a challenging stunt or a breakthrough appearance for a character.” He went on to reflect on his long career in the industry and turning 70, adding: “Especially for us stunt people, we don’t know how lucky we are to be able to grow old.” The Police Story star was born in Hong Kong, China, and appeared in a number of low-budget action movies before making his big break in Hollywood in the 1980 film The Big Brawl. He was awarded an honorary Academy Award in 2016 for his contributions to the film industry. The actor concluded, “I’ve been in the entertainment business for 62 years and I cherish every moment because I’m lucky I’m still filming today.”   

The world’s oldest conjoined twins Lori and George Schappell have died at the age of 62. Lori and her transgender twin George passed away on Sunday at a hospital in Pennsylvania due to undisclosed causes, per their online obituaries. The siblings, who had partially-fused skulls and shared 30 per cent of their brains, defied doctors who said they wouldn’t live past the age of 30. The twins had previously made headlines after George, formerly Dori, came out as transgender. Lori was able-bodied but George, who had spina bifida, was confined to a wheelchair which his twin pushed around. He had enjoyed a successful career as a country singer but Lori pursued her interests elsewhere as a trophy-winning ten-pin bowler. She also worked at a hospital laundry for several years during the ’90s, arranging her schedule around George’s gigs, which took them around the world to countries including Germany and Japan, according to the Guinness World Records. The twins lived independently in a two-bedroom apartment in Pennsylvania where they took turns practicing their separate hobbies. They alternated whose room they slept in and also showered separately by using the shower curtain as a barrier as one stood outside the bath. The pair appeared on numerous shows including Jerry Springer, The Maury Povich Show and The Howard Stern Radio Show. In the past, when asked if the death of one would necessarily mean the death of the other, Lori said at the time: ‘No, it would not. That’s another misconception.’ George, then Reba, explained in the 1997 documentary: ‘If it’s caught early enough, we could both be rushed to the hospital and then in an emergency, quickly be separated to save the other one.’ Elaborating further on whether they had ever wished to be separated, he said no: ‘Would we be separated? Absolutely not. My theory is: why fix what is not broken?’  

The mystery around Kate Beckinsale’s health continues as the Underworld actress has deleted all posts related to her hospital stay from her Instagram feed. For several weeks, the 50-year-old shared cryptic photos where she could be seen lounging in her room but as eagle-eyed followers have spotted, all posts related to the star’s health woes have been deleted. As she seemingly takes a break from the online platform, her comments have also been limited, although reasons for the change have been left unclear. The actress’ social media activity sparked concern in March, 2024, as she unveiled her health ordeal by sharing a string of shots where a teary-eyed Kate could be seen in a hospital gown with a large black bow in her hair. Her post was relayed on Instagram as she paid tribute to mothers around the world on Mother’s Day, including her own, Judy Loe. She refused to respond to worried fans who asked her for an update. “Thank you to those that love us and support us when it’s shit and try to make sure there are some bits that aren’t”, she had then penned. “And for looking after our dogs when we can’t, and lead us to remember happy things when we can’t. And turn up when we are sick and sit with us. And send balloons and check in and pull us out of wells with love.” A handful of days later, Kate still kept details around her health issues shrouded in secrecy as she continued to post from hospital to honour her late father, Richard, who passed away in 1979 as well as her stepfather, Roy Battersby, who drew his last breath at the age of 87 in January, 2024. After celebrating Easter in her hospital bed with a pair of festive socks, Kate posted photos while receiving a visit from pal Jonathan Voluck and seemed in good spirits as they wore peanut headbands while smiling at the camera. But, once again, she failed to mention why she’d been hospitalised. On April 9, 2024, the actress added fuel to the fire by posting and also deleting a photo of her mother Judy with a black eye. Fans grew increasingly frantic as she captioned: “My mum is hurt. Everything in me just wants me to scream. That soft, beautiful face, the unfairness of yet another fucking blow, this time to the face, hands, knee. As I am twisting my guts up to rail at this, she dresses in delicate purple to jauntily complement and has managed not to break a single bone. No one is stronger, no one terrifies me more in her fragility. Please mind, if you can. Minding helps.” But when faced with questions about her health, particularly as fans remember she had suffered from a ruptured ovarian cyst in January, 2019, Kate denied that she was being treated for a ruptured cyst or endometriosis. 

On This Day

  • 1865 – U.S. President Abraham Lincoln is shot in Ford’s Theatre by John Wilkes Booth; Lincoln dies the following day. 
  • 1912 – The British passenger liner RMS Titanic hits an iceberg in the North Atlantic and begins to sink.
  • 1958 – The Soviet satellite Sputnik 2 falls from orbit after a mission duration of 162 days.This was the first spacecraft to carry a living animal, a female dog named Laika, who likely lived only a few hours.
  • 1986 – The heaviest hailstones ever recorded, each weighing 1 kilogram, fall on the Gopalganj district of Bangladesh, killing 92.
  • 1999   – A severe hailstorm strikes Sydney, Australia causing A$2.3 billion in insured damages, the most costly natural disaster in Australian history. 
  • 2003 – The Human Genome Project is completed with 99% of the human genome sequenced to an accuracy of 99.99%.


Last Meals 

A Missouri man who murdered his cousin and her husband in 2006 has been executed by lethal injection despite clemency appeals by prison staff.

Brian Dorsey, 52, shot Sarah and Ben Bonnie after they agreed to help him with debts he owed to drug dealers.

The couple’s four-year-old daughter was at the home during the fatal attack. 

Dorsey nearly faced ‘surgery without anaesthesia’ to find a vein to inject the lethal drug due his obesity. Currently there is no guidance on how far the execution team can go to find a suitable vein, leaving open the possibility of an invasive “cutdown procedure,” Dorsey’s attorneys said. 

The procedure involves an incision that could be several inches wide and several inches deep. Forceps are used to tear tissue away from a vein that becomes the injection point.

However, the procedure wasn’t required and he was pronounced dead at 18:11 local time on Tuesday, according to a news release from the Missouri Department of Corrections.

Advocates for Dorsey argued that he had reformed during his stay in prison and that he did not have adequate legal defence during his trial.

The US Supreme Court rejected two bids to delay the execution. The governor also rejected a request for clemency, saying in a statement on Monday that Dorsey “punished his loving family for helping him in a time of need”.

Missouri Governor Michael Parsons also cited prosecutors’ claims that he sexually assaulted his cousin’s body after killing her. Lawyers for Dorsey reject the allegation, saying it was never proven at trial.

Dorsey turned himself in to the police three days after the attack. He confessed and pleaded guilty.

He is the first inmate executed by Missouri this year, after four people were put to death in the state in 2023.

Lawyers for Dorsey argued that he had become a model inmate in the last 17 years, one who worked as a prison barber giving haircuts to staff, and was remorseful for his crimes.

They said he was suffering drug-induced psychosis at the time of the attack, two days before Christmas, and that his lawyers faced a financial conflict of interest during trial.

At the time, the Missouri Public Defender Office’s paid court-appointed lawyers a flat fee of $12,000 per case. A low sum, given the thousands of hours normally needed in capital justice murder cases.

They argue his lawyers rushed him to take a plea deal that did not ensure that he would not be given a death sentence.

Former Missouri Supreme Court Justice Michael Wolff wrote to the governor saying the payment system, which has since been changed, has “undoubtedly influenced everything”.

Mr Wolff wrote that executing Dorsey “will dishonour our system of capital punishment”.

A petition signed by more than 70 correctional officers argued his sentence should be commuted to life in prison due to good behaviour.

“The Brian I have known for years could not hurt anyone,” one officer wrote in the petition. “The Brian I know does not deserve to be executed.”

In his final statement before his death, Dorsey again apologised to his victims and their relatives.

“To all of the family and loved ones I share with Sarah  and to all of the surviving family and loved ones of Ben, I am totally, deeply, overwhelmingly sorry,” he wrote.

“Words cannot hold the just weight of my guilt and shame. I still love you. I never wanted to hurt anyone. I am sorry I hurt them and you.”

Ahead of the execution, relatives of Dorsey’s victims called his sentence being carried out “a light at the end of the tunnel”.

Dorsey “was a close family member who was given a safe haven to get him out of a bad situation and turned this helping hand into the ultimate betrayal of a loved one”, according to a statement from Sarah Bonnie’s family. 

According to the Missouri Department of Corrections, before his execution he ordered his favourite foods, which included two cheeseburgers, two large French fries, two orders of chicken strips and a sausage, pepperoni, onion, mushrooms and extra cheese pizza.

The execution was carried out by a single dose of the sedative pentobarbital at the state prison in Bonne Terre.

Last Week’s Birthdays

Adrien Brody (51), Anthony Michael Hall (56), Sarah Michelle Gellar (47), Robert Carlyle (63), Julie Christie (84), Rob McElhenney (47), Peter Capaldi (66), Bokeem Woodbine (51), Ron Perlman (74), Peter Davison (73), William Sadler (74), Edward Fox (87), Jennifer Morrison (45), Saoirse Ronan (30), Claire Danes (45), Shannen Doherty (53), Andy Garcia (68), Ed O’Neill (78), Nicholas Brendon (53), David Letterman (77), Milly Alcock (24), Tricia Helfer (50), Matt Ryan (43), Jeremy Clarkson (64), Charlie Hunnam (44), Daisy Ridley (32), Haley Joel Osment (36), David Harbour (49), Steven Seagal (72), Peter MacNicol (70), Kristen Stewart (34), Elle Fanning (26), Dennis Quaid (70), Mark Pellegrino (59), Cynthia Nixon (58), Robin Wright (58), Katee Sackhoff (44), Patricia Arquette (56), and Dean Norris (61).

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