Dead Pool 16th March 2014

Dead Pool Background

With the death of the great Tony Benn, we have a few points to award. Congratulations to Julie and Chrissy, both scoring 62 points. To be honest I though more of us had him, including me, sadly this wasn’t so. Maybe old Tony should have been more aware of the Ides of March, I know I was and I’m still here! Anyhow, onwards to the frivolity.

Look Who You Could Have Had:

In Other News

CS43425358Wesley-Warren-T-1981266Sadly I have to report the death of Wesley Warren, the man with the biggest testicles in the known universe! You might remember poor Warren from the Channel 4 documentary covering his life before and during his operation to remove his 10 stone balls. Tragically, even though he recovered from his testicular problem, he died of a heart attack related to his diabetes last week. Rest in peace old titan bollocks!

Chris TarrantChris Tarrant is recovering in hospital after suffering a mini-stroke. His manager, Paul Vaughan, said he had been taken ill on a flight to London from Bangkok in Thailand on Saturday and was taken to Charing Cross hospital. The 67-year-old broadcaster had been filming in Asia and South America before falling ill and Vaughan said he would not be going straight back to work after he is discharged,  much to the delight of everyone I’m sure.

michael_schumacherAfter reporting last week that Michael Schumacher was turning into a cabbage, the German seems to be showing signs of improvement. One assumes he’s now a parsnip! Doctors treating the former F1 champion seem to think he’s going to pull through, maybe even reaching the complex state of lettuce by next week! If anyone can, I’m sure Michael can!

angelina-jolie-33354Angelina Jolie has confirmed that she is to undergo further preventative cancer surgery after she was subjected to a double mastectomy last year. The 38-year-old actress had the procedure after discovering she was at high risk of developing breast cancer. Jennifer Aniston is said to be punching the air and shouting something about ‘take that Brad…’

walnut-breaking-record-1And finally a Pakistani martial arts expert has found notoriety after headbutting his way through 155 walnuts in one minute. His record-breaking attempt literally smashed the previous record of 44 walnuts. Surrounded by a crowd of onlookers and officials, Mohammad Rashid proceeded to crack a long line of walnuts laid out on a table using only his forehead. After his minute was up, a breathless Rashid looked pleased with his efforts. However a few of the walnuts clearly got the better of him, as he could be seen wiping away a few spots of blood from his head. One question though.. Why?

On This Day

Deaths

Last Week’s Birthdays

chuck norrisJuliette Binoche (50), Chuck Norris (74), Shannon Tweed (57), Sharon Stone (56), Robin Thicke (37), Olivia Wilde (30), Emeli Sande (27), Johnny Knoxville (43), Thora Birch (32), Liza Minnelli (68), Neil Sedaka (75), William H. Macy (64), Michael Caine (81), Quincy Jones (81), Billy Crystal (66), Eva Longoria (39), and Will.I.Am (39).

2013 League Table

[confidential]

Next week peeps!

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