Dead Pool 28th January 2018

Unsurprisingly, nobody scored this week, however we all know a few people on the list below. Without further ado, let’s get on with it!

Look Who You Could Have Had:

• Howard Lew Lewis, 76, English comedian and actor (Brush Strokes, Maid Marian and Her Merry Men, Chelmsford 123).
• Jim Rodford, 76, English bassist (Argent, The Kinks, The Zombies), injuries from a fall.
• Connie Sawyer, 105, American actress (Dumb and Dumber, Pineapple Express, When Harry Met Sally…).
• Simon Shelton, 52, British actor (Teletubbies, Incredible Games).
• Ursula K. Le Guin, 88, American science fiction writer (A Wizard of Earthsea, The Left Hand of Darkness, The Dispossessed).
• Lari White, 52, American country singer (“Now I Know”, “That’s My Baby”) and actress (Cast Away), peritoneal cancer.
• Mark E. Smith, 60, English singer and songwriter (The Fall).
• Stacey Young, 52, British fashion model, brain cancer.
• Mort Walker, 94, American comics artist (Beetle Bailey, Hi and Lois), complications from pneumonia.
• Ingvar Kamprad, 91, Swedish businessman, founder of IKEA.

In Other News

Neil Diamond has officially announced his retirement from touring due to his recent Parkinson’s diagnosis. The third leg of his 50th Anniversary tour, which was set to launch in March across Australia and New Zealand, has been cancelled as was medically recommended by his doctor. Fans who already purchased tickets will be refunded in full. “I plan to remain active in writing, recording and other projects for a long time to come,” the singer wrote in a statement Monday on his website. “My thanks goes out to my loyal and devoted audiences around the world. You will always have my appreciation for your support and encouragement. This ride has been ‘so good, so good, so good’ thanks to you.” Diamond will be presented with the Lifetime Achievement Award by the Recording Academy at the Grammy Awards on Sunday, thus assuring his death as soon as possible.

Sir Ken Dodd has pulled no punches in attacking the sick individuals behind a fake news report that claimed he had died. In an exclusive interview with the The Dead Pool editorial team, and speaking from his hospital bed, the national treasure told us he is on the road to recovery. This story of his demise was spread across the nation via social media. The veteran entertainer said: “These monstrous evil trolls – people – should go back to the hell they came from. I wish them a reverse curse.” Dodd, who celebrated his 90th birthday in November, was admitted to the Liverpool Heart and Chest Hospital a week last Friday with a severe chest infection. And having dismissed the sad people who caused such upset on Monday night, he said: “I’ve had a good day today (Tuesday) and I’m really starting to get some kind of recovery, but it is going to take some time. “According to the medical people here, millions of people all over Britain are suffering from the same complaint – and it takes a long time to get rid of it.”

Julian Assange’s long stay in the Ecuadorian embassy in London is having a “dangerous” impact on his physical and mental health, according to clinicians who carried out the most recent assessments of him. They renewed calls for the WikiLeaks publisher to be granted safe passage to a London hospital. Sondra Crosby, a doctor and associate professor at the Boston University’s school of medicine and public health, and Brock Chisholm, a London-based consultant clinical psychologist, examined Assange for 20 hours over three days in October. Although the two did not go into details, Assange’s health appears to be deteriorating significantly after more than five years holed up in the embassy. Since he sought refuge in the embassy in June 2012, following an extradition request from Sweden over allegations of sexual assault, there have been various reports that he has a serious shoulder issue that requires an MRI scan, which would be near impossible to organise inside the embassy. He is also said to have a lung problem. They added, “Our assessment reveals that he has had no access to sunlight, appropriate ventilation or outside space for over five and a half years. This has taken a considerable physical as well as psychological toll.”

Sir Elton John has announced he will stop touring in order to prioritise his family. Speaking in New York, the star said he would say goodbye to fans with a series of 300 dates spanning three years. “I always thought I was going to be like Ray Charles, BB King – on the road forever,” he said. “My priorities have changed. We had children and it changed our lives. That doesn’t mean to say I’m not going to be creative. But I’m not going to travel.” The star denied reports in the press that he was retiring due to ill health. “Last year I picked up an infection and I was very ill and it knocked me sideways,” he admitted. But I still did 96 shows. “Believe me – if you ever do 300 shows, you’re not in ill health.” Isn’t that what Michael Jackson said???

Fiften To One quiz show host William G. Stewart left more than £2.4 million in his will – but nothing to his eldest son, The Dead Pool can reveal. Stewart died aged 84 in September last year after a short illness. He left most of his fortune and his Surrey mansion to third wife Laura, 60, and four of his five children will inherit the estate once Laura passes away. But his first child, Nick, a media consultant, will not receive a penny, according to official records. Stewart produced and directed a string of programmes including Bless This House, Love Thy Neighbour and The Price Is Right before going on to pose the questions on Fifteen To One from 1988 to 2003. He initially wanted Jonathan Ross to host it but stepped into the limelight himself when Ross turned down the role. Last night, Nick’s wife Christine said he was not aware he had been left out of his father’s will. Stewart’s family declined to comment yesterday.

On This Day

• 814 – Charlemagne dies of pleurisy in Aachen as the first Holy Roman Emperor. He is succeeded by his son Louis the Pious as king of the Frankish Empire.
• 1393 – King Charles VI of France is nearly killed when several dancers’ costumes catch fire during a masquerade ball.
• 1547 – Henry VIII dies. His nine-year-old son, Edward VI, becomes king.
• 1896 – Walter Arnold of East Peckham, Kent, becomes the first person to be convicted of speeding. He was fined one shilling, plus costs, for speeding at 8 mph (13 km/h), thereby exceeding the contemporary speed limit of 2 mph (3.2 km/h).
• 1956 – Elvis Presley makes his first American television appearance.
• 1958 – The Lego company patents the design of its Lego bricks, still compatible with bricks produced today.
• 1985 – Supergroup USA for Africa (United Support of Artists for Africa) records the hit single We Are the World, to help raise funds for Ethiopian famine relief.
• 1986 – Space Shuttle program: STS-51-L mission: Space Shuttle Challenger explodes after liftoff, killing all seven astronauts on board.

Deaths

• 814 – Charlemagne, Holy Roman emperor (b. 742)
• 1547 – Henry VIII, king of England (b. 1491)
• 1939 – W. B. Yeats, Irish poet and playwright, Nobel Prize laureate (b. 1865)
• 1986 – crew of Space Shuttle Challenger
• 1996 – Jerry Siegel, American author and illustrator, co-created Superman (b. 1914)

Last Week’s Birthdays

Bridget Fonda (54), Patton Oswalt (49), Alan Cumming  (53), James Cromwell (78), Mimi Rogers (62), Frank Miller (61), Scott Glenn (77), Ellen DeGeneres (60), Eddie Van Halen (63), Alicia Keys (37), John Terry (68), Kristen Schaal (40), Mischa Barton (32), Nastassja Kinski (57),  Ade Edmondson (61), Neil Diamond (77), Rutger Hauer (74), Gil Gerard (75), Olivia d’Abo (49), Linda Blair (59), Piper Laurie (86), Geena Davis (62), Martin Shaw (73), and Emma Bunton (42).