Dead Pool 27th March 2022

A quiet week until Taylor Hawkins shocked the world. Rather odd real, I’d only just watched Studio 666 the night before and thought he was the best actor other than Grohl himself.  

Look Who You Could Have Had:

In Other News

‘Canoe man’ John Darwin is willing to travel to Ukraine to fight, according to his second wife – who insists he has ‘good life insurance’. Mercy Mae Avila Darwin, 48, said her 71-year-old husband, who faked his death for money, is ‘on his way’ to join troops fighting against Russian forces. When questioned about the danger, she told the flying monkeys: ‘Yes, dangerous for the Russian when he shoot them. He will have a bullet proof vest and good life insurance, good for me.’ Her comments come ahead of an ITV drama, ‘The Thief, His Wife And The Canoe’, airing next month, exploring the culpability of John’s first wife, Anne. The Darwins’ jaw-dropping deception tricked insurers, police and even their two sons into believing the ex-prison officer had died in a North Sea accident in 2002. The couple started a new life in Panama but the tale unravelled in 2007 when a photo emerged of John and his wife smiling alongside an estate agent in Panama where they had moved to run an eco-resort. Their elaborate plot wiped off their £700,000 debt and fooled insurers into paying out over £500,000 so that they could start a new life abroad. They were jailed for the fraud and the extent of the parents’ deception shocked the world. During her trial at Teesside Crown Court, Anne used the unusual defence of marital coercion, claiming her domineering husband had forced her to go through with the massive deception. Nowadays, Darwin and his new wife live outside Manila, with Darwin continuing to receive the UK state pension. His wife is said make a living running clothes stalls in the capital.      

Dramatic pictures captured the moment former heavyweight champ Mike Tyson embraced an armed man who moments earlier pulled out a gun after trying to fight him at a Hollywood comedy club. On Tuesday an unidentified man was filmed interrupting a comedy set at a Hollywood rooftop bar to challenge Tyson to a fight in a deranged attempt to ‘elevate his status’, the flying monkeys reported. The bar’s MC interrupts the random man’s tirade and and asks him to get out. That MC then proceeds to shove the troublemaker away from the stage. But the man, wearing a white t-shirt and black leather jacket tries to play off the situation, saying: ‘I don’t give a fuck! I’m joking’ as the host pushes him towards the exit. It’s then the man says ‘look, this is easy’ and pulls out a gun from his waistband and cocks it, shocking the MC and drawing gasps from crowd members. Almost immediately the man seems to change his mind and puts the gun back into his waistband and says: ‘I’m out of here’ and walks towards the exit. He then stops and looks at Tyson who is seated in the front row and says ‘Hey I love you fam, salute to all of your accomplishments, for real, if it wasn’t for you we wouldn’t have no inspiration, I love you OG, for real. From the heart, for real.  Respect.’ When he is told to leave once again he says ‘I told you am just joking’ laughing it off. Tyson who the entire time has been sitting calmly, appearing unfazed, calls the man over.  The armed man says ‘No’, because he fears the owners will call the police, but Tyson insists. The man then goes in for a handshake and the two then hug it out. The man then screams ‘New York! Brownsville!’ referencing the neighbourhood Tyson grew up in, before firmly shaking his hand again, grasping it tightly with two hands and leaning in with his forehead. He then shouts ‘Shalawam!’ which translates to ‘May peace be with you’ in Hebrew and salutes Tyson before walking away. As the MC tells him to head out, he once again grows confrontational and calls him a ‘sucker’ ‘You a bitch ass nigger, you not an OG,’ he says before he finally leaves.After he is finally gone, the person recording thanks Tyson and the tense crowd applauds him.

There has been a whole horde of ‘celebrities’ who have been rushed to hospital this week, all seem to be suffering from a mystery illness. Rather than fill up the pages of the newsletter with inane stories, let’s just list them: 

Made in Chelsea ‘star’ Sam Thompson was rushed to hospital this week with acute stomach pain. The 29 year old probably just needed a good shit, but has apparently been diagnosed with a hernia. 

Onto Kate Lawler; the Big Brother ‘star’ has vowed to make changes after she was rushed to hospital Thursday. The 41 year old radio presenter did not divulge what was wrong with her, but probably needed a good shit. 

Josh Widdicombe also jumped on the mystery illness bandwagon. The comedian missed his scheduled Last Leg show because he’d been ‘throwing up all week’. Josh added that he’s been having stomach issues, probably needed a good shit. 

Not to be outdone, Big Brother’s Aisleyne Horgan-Wallace was rushed to hospital with pneumonia! The ‘star’, 43, took to Instagram to update her fans on the pain she’d been suffering after her diagnosis, which couldn’t have been that bad as she managed to post on Instagram. 

Then we have Emmerdale’s Samantha Giles who sparked concern as she’s was rushed to hospital with her version of the mystery illness! Samantha, 50, tweeted that she was in hospital after needing urgent medical treatment and would be “home soon”. Again, we have no idea what was wrong with her, probably needed a good shit. 

On This Day

  • 1871 – The first international rugby match, when Scotland defeats England in Edinburgh at Raeburn Place.
  • 1886 – Geronimo, Apache warrior, surrenders to the U.S. Army, ending the main phase of the Apache Wars.
  • 1915 – Typhoid Mary, the first healthy carrier of disease ever identified in the United States, is put in quarantine for the second time, where she would remain for the rest of her life.
  • 1977 – Tenerife airport disaster: Two Boeing 747 airliners collide on a foggy runway on Tenerife in the Canary Islands, killing 583 (all 248 on KLM and 335 on Pan Am). Sixty-one survived on the Pan Am flight. This is the deadliest aviation accident in history.
  • 1998 – The Food and Drug Administration approves Viagra for use as a treatment for erectile dysfunction, the first pill to be approved for this condition in the United States.


  • 1968 – Yuri Gagarin, Russian colonel, pilot, and astronaut (b. 1934).
  • 2000 – Ian Dury, English singer-songwriter and actor (b. 1942).
  • 2002 – Dudley Moore, English actor (b. 1935).
  • 2002 – Billy Wilder, Austrian-born American director, producer, & screenwriter (b. 1906).

Typhoid Mary’s Tragic Tale

George Soper was not your typical detective. He was a civil engineer by training, but had become something of an expert in sanitation. So when, in 1906, a landlord in Long Island was struggling to trace the source of a typhoid outbreak, Soper was called in. The landlord had rented his Long Island house to a banker’s family and servants that summer. By late August, six of the house’s 11 inhabitants had fallen ill with typhoid fever.

Soper had been previously hired by New York state to investigate disease outbreaks – “I was called an epidemic fighter,” he later wrote – and believed that typhoid could be spread by one person serving as a carrier. In Long Island, he focused his attention on the cook, Mary Mallon, who had arrived three weeks before the first person became ill. 

What Soper discovered would demonstrate how an unwitting carrier could be the root of disease outbreaks, and, later, spark a debate about personal autonomy when it’s pitted against public health.

Combing through the roster of wealthy New Yorkers who had employed Mallon in their summer homes between 1900 and 1907 he found a trail of 22 infected people. Typhoid fever is a bacterial infection typically spread through food and water contaminated by salmonella. Patients fall ill with high fever, diarrhoea – and, before antibiotics were developed to treat it, sometimes delirium and death.

At that time, without regulated sanitation practices in place, the disease was fairly common and New York had battled multiple outbreaks. In 1906, the year Soper began his investigation, a reported 639 people had died of typhoid in New York. But never before had an outbreak been traced to a single carrier – and certainly not one without any symptoms themselves.

Soper learned that Mallon would often serve ice cream with fresh peaches on Sunday. Compared to her hot, cooked meals, he deduced that “no better way could be found for a cook to cleanse her hands of microbes and infect a family.”  

Four months after he started the investigation, Soper found Mallon working in a Park Avenue brownstone. The 37-year-old Irish cook, he later described, was “five feet six inches tall, a blond with clear blue eyes, a healthy colour and a somewhat determined mouth and jaw.” When confronted with his evidence and a request for urine and faeces samples, she surged at Soper with a carving fork.  

Dr. S. Josephine Baker, an up-and-coming advocate of hygiene and public health, was dispatched to convince Mallon to provide samples, but was also chased away. Baker, whose father had died of typhoid, later made it her mission to promote preventative medicine (and became the first woman to earn a doctorate in public health). “It was Mary’s tragedy that she could not trust us,” Baker later wrote. 

Finally, Mallon was escorted by Baker and five policemen to a hospital where – after a nearly successful escape attempt – she tested positive as a carrier for Salmonella typhi, a bacteria that causes typhoid. This would later be confirmed by more tests. She was quarantined in a small house on the grounds of Riverside Hospital. The facility was isolated on North Brother Island, a tiny speck of land off the Bronx.

Mallon herself had no symptoms of typhoid and didn’t believe she could be spreading it. It’s likely Mallon never understood the meaning of being a carrier, particularly since she exhibited no symptoms herself. The only cure, doctors told Mallon, was to remove her gallbladder, which she refused. She was dubbed “Typhoid Mary” by the New York American in 1909 and the name stuck.

In a hand-written letter to her lawyer that June, Mallon complained. “I have been in fact a peep show for everybody. Even the interns had to come to see me and ask about the facts already known to the whole wide world. The tuberculosis men would say ‘There she is, the kidnapped woman,’” she wrote. “Dr. Park has had me illustrated in Chicago. I wonder how the said Dr. William H. Park would like to be insulted and put in the Journal and call him or his wife Typhoid William Park.”

In 1909, she sued the New York City Department of Health and the case was brought to the Supreme Court. In the court of public opinion, Mallon had stirred a debate over individual autonomy and the state’s responsibility in a public health crisis. In the court of law, her lawyer argued she had been imprisoned without due process.

The court declined to release her, saying “it must  protect the community against a recurrence of spreading the disease,” but Mallon was freed early the following year by the city’s new health commissioner. He agreed on the condition that she stop cooking.

Without other skills and unconvinced that her condition was a danger, Mallon drifted back to her old job around New York and New Jersey. She prepared meals for a hotel, a Broadway restaurant, a spa, and a boarding house. When, in 1915, a typhoid outbreak sickened 25 people at Sloane Maternity Hospital, George Soper was again called to investigate. The cook, “Mrs. Brown,” was discovered to be Mallon. 

Mallon was sent back to North Brother island – permanently. She spent her days reading and working in the laboratory preparing medical tests. She died there of a stroke in 1938, after a quarter-century of quarantine. She never admitted to being a carrier of typhoid, and perhaps without the education to understand it, actually never believed it. Nine people attended her funeral at St. Luke’s in the Bronx.

During the course of two outbreaks, at least 51 people caught typhoid through Mallon, and three died. The number of cases was probably much higher. “The story of Typhoid Mary indicates how difficult it is to teach infected people to guard against infecting others,“ Soper warned. But the authorities had already changed the way they responded to such threats. At the time of Mallon’s death, more than 400 healthy carriers of typhoid who had been identified by New York officials, and none had been forced into confinement.

The legacy of “Typhoid Mary” as an asymptomatic vessel for disease led to the theory of “superspreaders” that has surfaced in disease outbreaks ever since. “Since ‘Typhoid Mary’ was discovered, the whole problem of carriers in relation to infectious diseases has assumed an immense importance,” Soper said in a speech in 1913, “an importance which is recognised in every country where effective public health work is done and in every army where communicable disease has been brought under control.”

Last Week’s Birthdays

Quentin Tarantino (59), Nathan Fillion (51), Michael York (80), Julian Glover (87), Fergie (47), Mariah Carey (53), Jessie J (34), Keira Knightley (37), Jennifer Grey (62), James Caan (82), Martin Short (72), Diana Ross (78), Steven Tyler (74), Lee Pace (43), Sarah Jessica Parker (57), Richard O’Brien (80), Paul Michael Glaser (79), Elton John (75), Jessica Chastain (45), Jim Parsons (49), Alyson Hannigan (48), Lara Flynn Boyle (52), Kelly LeBrock (62), Tig Notaro (51), Mark Calaway (57), Amanda Plummer (65), Joanna Page (45), Reese Witherspoon (46), William Shatner (91), Carter Wong (75), Gary Oldman (64), Sonequa Martin-Green (37), Matthew Broderick (60), Timothy Dalton (76), and Rosie O’Donnell (60).

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